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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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Ethnic Joke: The Height of Ingratitude

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

A poor decrepit Irishman, with a large family, was out of work and broke. He needed $50 very badly. He applied to his priest who advised him to search for work and pray, and he would find it. A week went by without results so the Irishman decided to appeal to the Lord directly. He wrote a stirring tearful letter asking for $50. he addresses the letter to the Lord God in care of Heaven, and mailed it, but did not put a stamp on it.

The postman, thinking it was only a child's letter, opened it and after reading same [sic] was deeply touched by the appeal. That night he took the letter with him to the Masonic Lodge meeting and brought it to the attention of the lodge in session. They promptly voted him $25, and they sent it to the Irishman.

A few days later the postman found another letter similar to the one addressed without a stamp. He opened it and read: Dear God, Thanks for the money, but please - next time send it by way of the Knights of Columbus because the goddamned Masons stole half of it.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

The word IRISH is written in the top left corner of the submission.

Submission card located in a pile marked To Be Classified.

Where learned: HOME ; MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): CHARITY ; GIFT MONEY ; HUMOR ; INGRATITUDE ; Irish ; IRISHMEN ; Knights of Columbus ; Masons ; MONEY ; POVERTY ; Stereotype ; STUPIDITY

James Callow Keyword(s): Irish

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman

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Ethnic Joke: The Italian Who Came to Detroit

Ima don lak Detroit worth a sheet. I check inna hotel and go down for breakfast an I tella da girl I wanna ham and eggs and two piece a toast. I tella her I wanna two peese. She say if you wanna to peese go to da toilet. I say you no unnerstand, I wanna two peese on my plate. She say you don peese on your plate, you sonna ma beech. I no eat, I go to my room.

At lunch time I go donna da street for my lunch inna Drake Hotel. The waitress brings me a knife an a napkin but no foke. I tella her I wanna foke. She say whatta you talk, everybody wanna foke. I say you no unnerstand, I wanna foke on the table. She say you don care where you foke, you sonna ma bech. So when she call me sonna ma beech, I go back to hotel.

When I get inna da room I got no sheet on my bed, so I calla da manager and tell him I wanna sheet on my bed. He says don sheet on your bed, go to the bathroom. You no unnerstand, I say, I wanna sheet on the bed. He say you better not sheet on your bed, you sonna ma beech. So when he call me a sonna ma beech, I go check out. I go to da desk to check out to New York, and when I leave the manacer say Peace on You. I say peese on you too, you sonna ma beech cause I go back to Italy.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

The word Italian is written in the upper left hand corner of the submission.

Submission card was located in a pile marked To Be Classified.

Where learned: HOME ; MICHIGAN ; SAINT CLAIR SHORES

Keyword(s): AMERICAN ; Cultural Divide ; EUPHEMISM ; HUMOR ; Italian ; Language ; Language Barrier ; NEW YORK ; OBSCENE IMPLICATION ; SPEECH ; Stereotype

James Callow Keyword(s): Italian

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote
ITAL

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A Joke

Informant told me that it is a standing joke among the Jewish people he knows that no two Jews can agree on anything except on what the third Jew should give.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

James Callow comment:

The word Jewish is written in the upper left hand corner of the submission.

The original BN's [A566, B660] have the lightest ink mark running through them. It may be that they were crossed out, or it may simply be a very light, very faint pen mark.

Submission card located in a pile marked To Be Classified.

Where learned: TELEPHONE ; TOLD BY

Keyword(s): ETHNIC JOKE ; HUMOR ; Jewish ; JOKE ; Stereotype

James Callow Keyword(s): Jewish

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote

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Ethnic Joke: French

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

There was this couple engaged to be married. He was a Frenchman, while she was American. Her father gives her advice about her fiance: "Daughter, don't marry a frenchman!" But father, I love this man very much, I'm sure he will be fine. Her father repeats his warning: "Don't marry a Frenchman, because in six months, he'll ask you to "Change ends!" Don't worry father, everything will be ok. So, they got married.

What do you know, but six months later, while they are in bed, the Frenchman says "Honey, would you mind changing ends, just for tonight?" The girl gets a little angry and says "I should have listened to my father, he was right about you Frenchmen!" The frenchman replied, "But honey, Don't you want to have any children?"

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Submission card was located in a pile marked To Be Classified.

Where learned: RENO HALL ; DORM ROOM

Keyword(s): ETHNIC JOKE ; FRENCH ; HOMOSEXUALITY ; Innuendo ; MARRIAGE ; REFERENCE TO SEXUAL INTERCOURSE ; SEXUAL EUPHEMISM ; Stereotype

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- C566

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Ethnic Joke: Italian

Two old friends are at an airport, watching theplanes land and take off. Suddenly, one says to the other, "Hey! I bet you $25.00 that the Pope is aboard that plane!" The other guy, thinking that he has a safe bet says "you're on!" They watch the plane land, and sure enough, the red carpet rolls out to meet the plane and the Pope walks out! Later, as they guy pays off his debt, he asks, "How in the world did you know that the Pope would be on board?" "Simple," replied the other. "The plane was marked T.W.A., and as we all know, that means Top Wop Aboard!"

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Submission Card located in pile marked To Be Classified.

Italian, Ethnic

Where learned: DORM ROOM

Keyword(s): AIRPLANES ; Airport ; Bet ; DEROGATORY ; DEROGATORY TERM=WOP (FOR ITALIAN) ; ETHNIC JOKE ; ETHNIC SLUR ; Gamble ; JOKE ; Pope ; Stereotype

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- C566
Filter - Mature Content

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Ethnic Joke: Italian

Three Italian men are talking about their individual sons' success in America. One says to the other two: "My son Luigi, he go to America, he go to college, he becomes a lawyer, he earns $30,000.00 dollars a year!"

On of the other two guys replies "Oh, that's nothing! My son Josephie, he go to America, he go to college, he becomes a doctor, he earns $50,000.00 a year!"
 But the third guy replies "That's Nothing!"

"My Vincenti, he go to America, he doesn't go to college, and he earns $200,000.00 a year!" The other two ask in amazement, "But what does your son do?" He replies, "He's a sports-mechanic. He fixes football games, basketball games, baseball games..."

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

The word Italian is written in the top left corner of the submission card.

Submission card was located in a pile marked To Be Classified.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ETHNIC JOKE HUMOR ; GAMBLING ; HUMOR ; Professions ; Stereotype

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- C566

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Ethnic Joke: Black

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

Ethnic (Black) Joke

5 Men are on the moon. Because of rocket engine trouble, only 4 can come back to Earth. The captain of the ship proposes a question to be asked to each of the men. If they answer correctly, they return to Earth. If not, they will be left there. He asks the first: "What was the worst sea-going accident of all time?" The crew man replies"The sinking of the Titanic." "Good!" the captain replies. "You have a place with me on the ship." He comes to the second crewman and asks, "how many people died on that ship?" The crew man answers "about 1100 people, sir." "Good!" The captain says. "You have a place on the ship with me." He comes to the third crewman and says "allright nigger, name 'em!"

(Obviously, he didn't make it...)

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

The word Negro is written in the top left hand corner of the submission card.

Submission card was located in a pile labeled To Be Classified.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT ; DORM ROOM

Keyword(s): DEROGATORY ; DEROGATORY SLANG ; Distasteful Jokes ; ETHNIC JOKE ; ETHNIC SLUR ; MOON ; NEGRO ; NIGGER ; RACISM ; Stereotype ; Titanic

James Callow Keyword(s): NEGRO

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- C566
RIDDLE -- W566
Filter - Mature Content

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Ethnic Joke: Black

Ethnic (Black) Joke:

Did you hear about the accident on the Lodge Freeway Yesterday?

A colored guy stuck his head out of the window while travelling 60 mph, and his lips beat him to death!

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

The word negro is written in the top left hand corner of the submission card.

Submission card was located in a pile labeled To Be Classified.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT ; TOLD AT INFORMANTS HOME

Keyword(s): AUTOMOBILE ; DEROGATORY ; DEROGATORY SLANG ; Distasteful Jokes ; ETHNIC JOKE ; Freeway ; NEGRO ; RACISM ; Stereotype

James Callow Keyword(s): NEGRO

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- C566
RIDDLE -- W566
Filter - Mature Content

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Ethnic Joke: Jewish

Irishman, Scotchman and Jew visiting dead friend in funeral parlor. Sign on dead man's chest says, "I'd like to take some money with me when I go." Irishman puts out $500. So does the Scotchman. Jew writes a $1500 check and takes the $1000 as change.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Original BN [B66] crossed out

Submission card located in pile marked [?]

Where learned: BUFFALO ; NEW YORK ; Collection

Keyword(s): AFTERLIFE ; BURIAL ; Dead ; Distasteful ; ETHNIC ; Funeral ; Irish ; Jewish ; JOKE ; MONEY ; Offensive ; Penny-pincher ; SCOTTISH ; Stereotype

James Callow Keyword(s): Jewish

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery

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Ethnic Joke: Misc.

One fellow advising another to buy Fisher Price Toy MFG.Co. stock, because they were planning to marker a new item that was expected to go great. It was a boxed jigsaw puzzle made expressly for (Poles, or Italians, or Irish, etc.) with instructions which would eliminate any confusion by saying "open either end."

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Submission located in pile marked [?]

Where learned: BUFFALO ; NEW YORK ; Collection

Keyword(s): BUSINESS ; Entertainments ; ETHNIC ; GAMES ; Investment ; Italian ; Jewish ; Mockery ; POLISH ; RIDICULE ; Stereotype ; Stock

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery

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Ethnic Joke: Black

Negro:

Excited negro bank bandit says "OK you mudder stickers, this is a fuck up."

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Submission card located in a pile marked [?]

Where learned: BUFFALO ; NEW YORK ; Collection

Keyword(s): Black ; DEROGATORY ; ETHNIC ; HUMOR ; Language ; NEGRO ; Offensive ; SLANG ; Stereotype ; TONGUE TWISTER

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery
Filter - Mature Content

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Ethnic Joke: Jewish

Descriptions of a Jewish Christmas Card: on the front it has a tree, and strung from the tree, instead of the usually bulbs [sic], it has 32 colored Matzo Balls, and on the top, instead of the star of Bethlehem, it has a Jewish star, not the star adavin [sic], but a picture of Sammy Davis Jr. or Liz Taylor, you can take your pick.

Submitter comment:

Sammy Davis Jr. and Liz Taylor are Jewish movie stars.

Data entry tech comment:

I believe that adavin is supposed to be "of David."

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Submission card located in pile marked [?]

Where learned: HOME ; MICHIGAN ; OAK PARK

Keyword(s): CHRISTMAS ; Decoration ; Distasteful ; ETHNIC ; Hollywood ; HUMOR ; Jewish ; JOKES ; Offensive ; Stereotype ; Tree

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery

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Ethnic Joke: Italian

Why couldn't Christ have been born in Italy?

There aren't three wise men or any virgins...

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs and BN added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Italian

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; WARREN

Keyword(s): Christ ; ETHNIC ; HUMOR ; Italian ; JOKE ; Off-Color ; Stereotype ; Virgin

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery
RIDDLE -- W566

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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE NEW CEREAL "QUEERIOS?"
YOU POUR ON THE MILK AND THEY EAT THEMSELVES.

Data entry tech comment:

Updated by TRD on 12-21-2010

Where learned: Massachusetts

Keyword(s): DEROGATORY ; Homophobia ; HOMOSEXUAL ; HUMOR ; JOKE ; Off-Color ; Stereotype

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote
Filter - Mature Content

Date learned: 00-00-1972

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Ethnic: Irish

An Irish Retort:

An Irishman is never drunk so long as he can hold on to one blade of grass and not fall off the face of the earth.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Why is this called a "retort"?

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): DRUNK ; ETHNIC ; Irish ; JOKE ; RETORT ; Stereotype

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula

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Toast

Here's to the world as round as a wheel

That all must feel,

If this life were a thing that you could buy,

The Jews would all live while the Irish would die.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Where learned: HOME

Keyword(s): Buy ; DRINKING ; ETHNIC ; Irish ; Jewish ; LIFE ; MONEY ; Purchase ; Social ; Stereotype ; TOAST ; Wheel

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Speech Speech
SPEECH -- Formula

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Belief

RED HEADED WOMEN ARE MORE PASSIONATE AND BLONDES HAVE MORE FUN.

Data entry tech comment:

Updated and Motifs added / 02-28-2011 / TRD

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; GROSSE POINTE

Keyword(s): Blonde ; Brunette ; COLOR ; Female ; HAIR ; Red ; Stereotype ; Woman ; WOMEN

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Body part Senses Hair, on head, mustache, widow's peak

Date learned: 02-12-1970

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Entertainment: Song

Rugby Song:

Ay-yi-yi-yi

Rodriguez the Mexican Pervert,

He'll cornhole your brother and gross out your mother, and waltz you around by your willy.

(This is sung, then a dirty limmerick, then this is repeated.)

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Where learned: Myself

Keyword(s): ; LIMERICK ; Mexican ; Pervert ; Rugby, Sport, Racism ; SONG ; Stereotype

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse C730.334
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Initiation rite Hazing
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Entertainment: Song

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

fraternity Song:

Aye-yi-yi-yi

In China they do it for Chile

So sing me another verse that's worse than the other verse, and waltz me around by my willy.

(Here is sung one's favorite filthy limerick) Then the chorus is repeated.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Where learned: Myself

Keyword(s): China ; Fraternity ; LIMERICK ; Racist ; SONG ; Stereotype ; Willy

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse C730.344
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Initiation rite Hazing
Filter - Mature Content

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A:WHAT DO YOU HAVE WHEN YOU CROSS A NEGRO WITH A JEW?
B:A JANITOR, BUT HE OWNS THE BUILDING!

Data entry tech comment:

Updated by TRD

Where learned: OHIO ; TROTWOOD

Keyword(s): African American ; Black ; ETHNIC SLUR ; Jewish ; JOKE ; NEGRO ; Stereotype

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question
Filter - Mature Content

Date learned: 04-00-1972

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