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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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SONG

I HATE BOSCO, BOSCO'S BAD FOR ME
MY MOMMY PUT IT IN MY MILK
AND TRIED TO POISON ME.
BUT I FOOLED MOMMY, I PUT IT IN HER TEA
AND NOW I HAVE NO MOMMY, TO TRY AND POISON ME.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): MATRICIDE ; PARODDY OF A COMMERCIAL JINGLE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery

Date learned: DATE NOT RECORDED BY COLLECTOR.

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I'M CONCHITA BANANA
AND I'M HERE TO SAY
HOW TO GET RID OF YOUR TEACHER
THE EASY WAY
PUT A BANANA ON THE FLOOR
AND WATCH YOUR TEACHER
SLIDE OUT THE DOOR.

DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, THE STAIRS SHE GOES
WHERE SHE LANDS KNOW ONE KNOWS
AND WHILE SHE'S GONE, THE KIDS HAVE FUN
DRINKING WHISKEY, BEER, AND RUM.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ANTI-TEACHER ; PARODY OF A COMMERCIAL JINGLE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery
Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Children

Date learned: DATE NOT RECORDED BY COLLECTOR.

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PEPSI JINGLE

PEPSI COLA HITS THE SPOT
TEN MINUTES LATER HITS THE POT.

Where learned: MICHIGAN, ASSUMED ; PLYMOUTH

Keyword(s): PARODY OF COMMERCIAL JINGLE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery
Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery

Date learned: DATE NOT RECORDED BY COLLECTOR

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RIDDLE

WHAT IS BLACK AND BLUE AND GOES DING-DONG?
A BEAT UP AVON LADY RINGING THE DOORBELL.

Data entry tech comment: AVON LADIES SELL COSMETICS DIRECTLY TO HOMES.

Where learned: SAINT LEONARD SCHOOL ; DETROIT, ASSUMED

Keyword(s): COLOR ; COMMERCIAL

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 11-15-1965

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GRAFFITI

LSD MELTS IN YOUR MIND, NOT IN YOUR HAND.

Data entry tech comment: THIS IS A PARODY OF THE M&M CANDY COMMERCIAL.

Where learned: DETROIT ; PLUM ST

Keyword(s): DRUGS PARODY OF TV COMMERCIAL ADVICE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Art Craft Architecture Art, Craft, Architecture

Date learned: 10-31-1967

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SAYING.

IF I'VE ONLY ONE LIFE TO LIVE, LET ME LIVE IT AS A BLONDE.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ADVERTISING ; HAIR COLORING, BLEACHING ; HUMOR. ; TELEVISION COMMERCIAL

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim

Date learned: DATE NOT RECORDED BY COLLECTOR.

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A POLITICAL JOKE

WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THE AJAX WHITE KNIGHT RODE THROUGH
TEXAS?
THEY ELECTED HIM GOVERNOR.

Submitter comment:

HEARD ON U. OF D.'S CAMPUS.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): REFERENCE TO AJAX CLEANING PRODUCTS TELEVISION COMMERCIAL

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman

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(sung to the tune "Colonel Bogey March" theme from
the movie "Bridge on the River Kwaii")

Comet, it makes your teeth turn green.
Comet, it tastes like gasoline.
Comet, it makes you vomit.
So drink some Comet, and vomit, today!

Submitter comment: Matthew only recently learned this song, and thought is
was new. When he tried to teach it to his older cousin,
Joshua, who lives in the Chicago area, Josh had already heard
of it.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ALLEN PARK

Keyword(s): Parody, commercial, humor

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest
Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Children

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Entry filtered.

"Death Certificate"

It's the nigga ya love to hate with a new song,
So what really goes on,
Nothin' butta come up,
But ain't that a bitch,
They hate to see a young nigga rich,
But I refuse to switch even tho,
Cause I can't move to the smella,
Cause soon as y'all get some dough,
Ya wanna but a white bitch on ya elbow,
Movin' outcha neighborhood,
But I walk through the ghetto,
And the flava's good,
Little kids jumpin' on me,
But you, ya wanna but white and corny,
Livin' way out; "Nigga Go Home!"
Spray painted on ya house,
Trying to be white or a Jew,
But ask yourself, who are they to be equal to,
Git the hell out!,
Stop being an Uncle Tom,
Ya little sell out!,
House nigga scum!,
Give somethin' back to the place where ya made it from,
Be true to the game!
Before ya end up broke,
Fuck around and get ya ghetto pass revoked!,
I ain't sayin' no names,
Ya know who ya are,
Ya little punk!
Be true to the game,
When ya first start rhymin',
It started off slow,
And then ya started climbin',
But it wasn't fast enough, I guess,
So ya gave ya other style a test,
Ya was hard-core hip-hop,
But looka' cha self boy!,
Ya done flip-flop,
Giving our music away to the main stream,
Don't cha know they ain't down with the team!,
They just sent their boss over,
Put a bug in ya ear,
And now ya crossed over!
On MTV, but they don't care,
They'll hava' new nigga next year!,
Ya out in the cold,
No more white fans and no more soul,
And ya might hava' heart attack,
When ya find out that black folks,
Don't wantcha back!
And ya know what's worse,
You was just like the nigga in the first verse,
Stop sellin' out ya race!
And wipe that stupid ass smile off ya face!
Niggas always gotta show they teeth!
Now I'ma be brief,
Be true to the game,
A message to the Oreo Cookie!
Find a mirror and take a look G,
Do you like whatcha see,
Butcha quick to pointcha finger at me!
Ya wanna be the big fish,
Ya little guppy,
Black man can't be no yuppy,
Ya put on ya suit and tie and ya good clothes,
Ya don't associate with the negroes!
Ya wanna be just like Jack,
But Jack is callin' you a nigga behind ya back,
So back off genius!
I don't need you to correct my broken English!
Ya know that's right!
You ain't white, so stop holdin' ya ass tight!
Cause ya can't pass,
So why ya keep tryin' to pass withcha black ass!
Mr. Big, but in reality you shorter than a mig',
Ya only gotcha self to blame,
Git a grip, Oreo, and be true to the game!

Submitter comment: Rap has been referred to as a trendy style of music, that
could not compete against the more traditional styles of music.
Soul, Pop, Rock, Country, Jazz and many others have to take a
back seat to this rising style of music. The media has placed
a dark veil of controversy around the Rap industry. Nevertheless,
Rap is a multi-million dollar business, giving the
more traditional forms of music stiff competition. It is and has
been a very pertinent part of black expression. Cliches from Rap
are finding their way to commercials, radio, and movies.

Where learned: Life experience

James Callow Keyword(s): African-American defectors to white commercialism rebuked

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Serious condemnation Scorn
Filter - Mature Content

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IF IN HEAVEN WE DON'T MEET,
TOGETHER WE WILL STAND THE HEAT,
IF IT GETS EXTREMELY HOT,
PEPSI COLA HITS THE SPOT.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): ADVERTISEMENT ; COMMERCIAL ; SODA POP

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Autograph Verse Wisecracks, gags, silly stories, insults

Date learned: 06-03-1959

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IN HEAVEN IF WE DON'T MEET,
HAND IN HAND, WE'LL BEAT THE HEAT.
AND IF IT GETS EXTREMELY HOT,
PEPSI COLA HITS THE SPOT.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): COMMERCIAL ; SODA POP

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Autograph Verse Wisecracks, gags, silly stories, insults

Date learned: 10-10-1967

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PROVERB

THE TRIDS OF TRIDVILLE WERE CONSTANTLY BEING PLAGUED
BY A MEAN OGRE WHO KICKED THEM VICIOUSLY. ONE DAY,
A RABBI CAME TO THE OGRE AND SAID, "OGRE, PLEASE DON'T
KICK THE TRIDS ANYMORE, KICK ME." THE OGRE REPLIED,
"SILLY RABBI, KICKS ARE FOR TRIDS."

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): PARODY OF TELEVISION COMMERCIAL FOR KIX CEREAL ADVERTISE-

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 10-00-1971

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YELLOW FINGERS

ONCE THERE WAS A KING WHO WANTED TO GET A MESSAGE THROUGH
TO A NEIGHBORING KINGDOM. BUT IN ORDER TO GET THROUGH,
THE MESSANGER WOULD HAVE TO PASS THE MONSTROUS YELLOW
FINGERS. FIRST A KNIGHT WAS SENT, BUT THE YELLOW FINGERS
PINCHED HIM TO DEATH. THEN A SQUIRE TRIED, BUT MET WITH
THE SAME FATE. FINALLY, A PAGE WAS SENT AND MADE IT
THROUGH.
THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS: LET YOUR PAGES DO THE WALKING
THROUGH THE YELLOW FINGERS.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): PUN ON COMMERCIAL FOR THE BELL TELEPHONE CO., WHICH SAYS,

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 10-15-1969

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IT FLOATS

THERE WAS AN OLD MAN WHO KILLED ANOTHER MAN AND DUMPED
HIS BODY IN THE RIVER. THAT NIGHT WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
HE HEARD A VOICE SAYING, "IT FLOATS, IT FLOATS." SO HE
JUMPED UP AND RAN DOWN TO THE RIVER, BUT HE COULDN'T
SEE THE BODY. THE NEXT NIGHT HE HEARD THE SAME VOICE
SAYING, "IT FLOATS, IT FLOATS." HE WENT BACK TO THE
RIVER, BUT HE COULDN'T FIND ANY BODY, SO HE WENT BACK
TO BED. THE NEXT NIGHT THE VOICE CAME AGAIN, SAYING
"IT FLOATS, IT FLOATS." HE WENT DOWN TO THE RIVER, BUT
HE COULDN'T FIND ANY FLOATING BODY. HE SAID "WHAT
FLOATS?" THE VOICE ANSWERED: "IVORY SOAP FLOATS."

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ADVERTISING COMMERCIAL

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 10-30-1968

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PROVERB

THE TRIDS OF TRIDVILLE WERE CONSTANTLY BEING PLAGUED
BY A MEAN OGRE WHO KICKED THEM VICIOUSLY. ONE DAY,
A RABBI CAME TO THE OGRE AND SAID, "OGRE, PLEASE DON'T
KICK THE TRIDS ANYMORE, KICK ME." THE OGRE REPLIED,
"SILLY RABBI, KICKS ARE FOR TRIDS."

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): PARODY OF TELEVISION COMMERCIAL FOR KIX CEREAL ADVERTISE- MENT, WHICH ENDED WITH THE WORDS "SILLY RABBIT, KIX ARE FOR KIDS."

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 10-00-1971

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YELLOW FINGER

ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A CASTLE THAT WAS GUARDED BY
A HUGE YELLOW FINGER, WHO WOULDN'T LET ANYONE PASS
THE KING FROM A RIVALING CASTLE SENT ONE OF HIS BRAVEST
KNIGHTS TO GET BY THE FINGER, BUT THE FINGER KILLED HIM.
SO THE KING SENT A DUKE, BUT HE, TOO, WAS KILLED. THEN
THE KING SENT ONE OF HIS PAGES. HE JUST WALKED RIGHT
THROUGH.
MORAL: LET YOUR PAGES DO THE WALKING THROUGH THE YELLOW
FINGER.

Submitter comment: IT SEEMS TO ME THERE WAS SLIGHTLY MORE BUILD-UP ON THIS
STORY, BUT I CAN'T REMEMBER IT.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): PUN ON TELEVISION ADVERTISEMENT: LET YOUR FINGERS DO THE WALKING THROUGH THE YELLOW PAGES. COMMERCIAL FOR THE BELL TELEPHONE CO., REGARDING SAVING TIME AND ENERGY BY PRE-SHOPPING THROUGH MAKING CAL

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 11-18-1968

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YELLOW FINGERS

ONCE THERE WAS A KING WHO WANTED TO GET A MESSAGE THROUGH
TO A NEIGHBORING KINGDOM. BUT IN ORDER TO GET THROUGH,
THE MESSANGER WOULD HAVE TO PASS THE MONSTROUS YELLOW
FINGERS. FIRST A KNIGHT WAS SENT, BUT THE YELLOW FINGERS
PINCHED HIM TO DEATH. THEN A SQUIRE TRIED, BUT MET WITH
THE SAME FATE. FINALLY, A PAGE WAS SENT AND MADE IT
THROUGH.
THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS: LET YOUR PAGES DO THE WALKING
THROUGH THE YELLOW FINGERS.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): PUN ON COMMERCIAL FOR THE BELL TELEPHONE CO., WHICH SAYS, "LET YOUR FINGERS DO THE WALKING, THROUGH THE YELLOW PAGES." TIMESAVING AND ENERGY SAVING METHOD OF SHOPPING--LOOK UP IN THE YELLOW PAGES O

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 10-15-1969

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IT FLOATS

THERE WAS AN OLD MAN WHO KILLED ANOTHER MAN AND DUMPED
HIS BODY IN THE RIVER. THAT NIGHT WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
HE HEARD A VOICE SAYING, "IT FLOATS, IT FLOATS." SO HE
JUMPED UP AND RAN DOWN TO THE RIVER, BUT HE COULDN'T
SEE THE BODY. THE NEXT NIGHT HE HEARD THE SAME VOICE
SAYING, "IT FLOATS, IT FLOATS." HE WENT BACK TO THE
RIVER, BUT HE COULDN'T FIND ANY BODY, SO HE WENT BACK
TO BED. THE NEXT NIGHT THE VOICE CAME AGAIN, SAYING
"IT FLOATS, IT FLOATS." HE WENT DOWN TO THE RIVER, BUT
HE COULDN'T FIND ANY FLOATING BODY. HE SAID "WHAT
FLOATS?" THE VOICE ANSWERED: "IVORY SOAP FLOATS."

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ADVERTISING COMMERCIAL

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 10-30-1968

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Language

Two instructors on Peabody's Campus, husband and wife (The VanEhens), have acquired a nickname because of their physical resemblance. They both have red hair and freckles and a chubby build and are called "The Campbell's Kids" from Campbell's SOup Commercials.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): Campbells ; Chubby ; Commercials ; FRECKLES ; HAIR ; Language ; Nickname ; Pop Culture ; Professor ; Red ; Resemblance ; Soup

Subject headings: Person / Nickname

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showing 19 items

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