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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE ALCOHOLIC SOLDIER IN
VIETNAM SUFFERING FROM BOTTLE FATIGUE?
Where learned: Vietnam
James Callow Keyword(s): BATTLE FATIGUE PUN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 10-30-1967
THE MOTH BALL
THEY HAD BEEN TRAINING THE MOTH FOR YEARS GIVING HIM
JUST THE PROPER TYPE OF FOOD; KEEPING HIS LIVING
QUARTERS AT THE CORRECT HEAT; MAKING SURE HE GOT
JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF SLEEP. HE WAS DOING
CALESTHENTICS NOW BECAUSE HE WAS IN TRAINING FOR
THE BIG DAY--THE MOTH EATING CONTEST OF THE
NEIGHBORHOOD.
THE STORY GOES ON THAT THIS MOTH WON THE NEIGHBORHOOD
CONTEST, GOES ON TO WIN THE PARISH, DISTRICT,
CITY, STATE, COUNTRY, WESTERN HEMISPHERE, WORLD, AND
IS FINALLY ENTERED INTO THE UNIVERSE CONTEST. ALL
THIS TIME, HE IS GETTING BIGGER AND BIGGER, FROM THE
SIZE OF A BUTTERFLY TO THE SIZE OF THE EMPIRE STATE
BUILDING. ALSO, THE PLACE WHERE THE CONTEST IS
HELD GETS BIGGER AND BIGGER, I.E., THE WORLD
CONTEST BEING HELD WITH SIBERIA AS THE CONTEST
GROUNDS AND THE UNIVERSE ON THE MOON. WHAT THEY
EAT ALSO INCREASES IN SIZE FROM HANDKERCHIEFS
UNTIL NOW IT'S MINK COATS AND BLANKETS. THIS MOTH
JUST BARELY EDGES OUT EVERY OTHER MOTH BY EATING ONE
MORE ARTICLE THAN THEY DO--AND JUST BARELY ABLE TO
GET IT DOWN.
ALL THE MOTHS HAD ASSEMBLED ON THE MOON EXCEPT FOR THE
REPRESENTATIVE FROM MARS. EVERYONE WAS WAITING FOR
THIS ONE, BECAUSE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE BIGGEST
MOTH IN EXISTENCE. ALL OF A SUDDEN, EVERYTHING WAS
DARK--WE LOOKED UP AND SAW THE MARTIAN MOTH FLYING
DOWN. HE WAS SO BIG, HE HAD COVERED THE SUN AS HE FLEW
IN. SO ALL THE MOTHS WERE READY; THE MOMENT OF TRUTH
HAD ARRIVED. THE JUDGES PLACED THE MINK COATS AND
BLANKETS IN FRONT OF THE MOTHS. TEN MINK COATS, TEN
BLANKETS, TWENTY COATS, TWENTY BLANKETS, THIRTY
COATS, THIRTY BLANKETS; AFTER FORTY COATS AND FORTY
BLANKETS, THERE WERE ONLY THREE MOTHS LEFT; OURS,
THE MOTH FROM VENUS, AND THE MOTH FROM MARS. AFTER
50 COATS AND 45 BLANKETS, THE MOTH FROM VENUS
DROPPED OUT. IT WAS US AND MARS. 60 COATS-60 BLANKETS,
70 COATS-70 BLANKETS. IT LOOKED AS THOUGH THERE WOULD
BE NO END TO THIS CONTEST. BUT, LO AND BEHOLD, AFTER 78
COATS AND 77 BLANKETS, THE MOTH FROM MARS ROLLED OVER,
HIS FEET STICKING UP IN THE AIR, GAVE A GREAT ROAR AND
DIED. WE WERE IN. ALL OUR MOTH HAD TO DO WAS EAT 3
MORE COATS AND 2 MORE BLANKETS--HE HAD ALREADY CONSUMED
76 COATS AND 75 BLANKETS. (HE ALWAYS WAS A SLOW EATER.)
SO HE ATE ONE COAT, ONE BLANKET; ANOTHER COAT AND ANOTHER
BLANKET. IT WAS TIED. ALL HE HAD TO DO NOW WAS FINISH
THAT LAST COAT AND WE WOULD BE THE CHAMPIONS OF THE
ENTIRE UNIVERSE. HE WALKED OVER TO THE LAST COAT,
LOOKED AT IT, PICKED IT UP AND TRIED TO EAT. HE
COULDN'T. WE BEGGED HIM, THREATENED HIM, BRIBED HIM,
DID EVERYTHING WE COULD POSSIBLY DO TO TRY TO MAKE HIM
EAT THIS LAST COAT. HE GOT A FIERY LOOK IN HIS EYES,
WENT UP TO THE COAT AGAIN, PICKED IT (UP) SET IT DOWN
AGAIN, AND WENT TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE RING AND
STARTED TO CRY. AND DO YOU KNOW THAT WAS THE FIRST
TIME A MOTH BAWL.
Submitter comment:
DENNIS DID NOT RECALL HEARING THIS STORY BEFORE THAT
SUMMER AND DID NOT KNOW WHERE HE FIRST HEARD IT.
Where learned: NOT GIVEN
James Callow Keyword(s): MOTHBALL
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
DO YOU KNOW WHAT A ZEBRA IS?
IT'S ABOUT TWENTY-FIVE SIZES LARGER THAN AN A-BRA.
Submitter comment:
LARRY HEARD IT AT THE TOWN AND GOWN SERIES, FROM A
GROUP CALLED THE ARBORS. (THEATER GROUP)
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; CAR
James Callow Keyword(s): BOSOM ; BREAST ; BUST
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 10-16-1967
AFTER AN EXCEPTIONAL PERFORMANCE ON BROADWAY, IT IS
CUSTOMARY TO TELL THE CAST TO "BREAK A LEG."
Submitter comment:
NO KNOWLEDGE OF WHERE OR HOW THE INFORMANT LEARNED
THE ITEM.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): ISN'T IT RATHER, BEFORE A PERFORMANCE, TO SAY "BREAK..."
| Subject headings: | CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Entertainment Diversion |
Date learned: 10-04-1967
ELDER ARMENIANS FINGER A STRING OF BEADS SIMILAR TO A
ROSARY TO PASS THE TIME. IN THE UNITED STATES,
ARMENIAN PEOPLE FINGER BEADS SO THAT THEY CAN STOP
SMOKING.
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS
James Callow Keyword(s): WORRY BEADS.
| Subject headings: | CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Entertainment Diversion |
Date learned: 09-00-1967
PHONE RINGS, SOMEONE PICKS UP THE RECEIVER AND / SAYS:
"HELLO, TIGER STADIUM, THIRD BASE."
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): BASEBALL STADIUM
| Subject headings: | SPEECH -- Formula |
Date learned: 00-00-1968
TRADITIONAL OCCUPATION
THE VAST MAJORITY OF THE STRUCTURAL STEEL WORKERS
IN NEW YORK CITY WHO WORK ON THE FRAMING FOR SKY-
SCRAPERS, ARE NAVAJO INDIANS WHO BECAUSE OF AN INBORN
SENSE OF BALANCE HAVE PASSED THIS HAZARDOUS JOB
DOWN FROM FATHER TO SON.
Where learned: NEW YORK CITY
James Callow Keyword(s): BUILDING TRADES ; SKYSCRAPERS.
| Subject headings: | CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Work Commerce Business |
Date learned: 00-00-1967
ACTIVITY-ASTRONOMY
CORN SHOULD BE PLANTED UNDER LEO TO INSURE LARGE
EARS. MM
CORN SHOULD BE PLANTED UNDER GEMINI TO INSURE TWO
EARS PER STALK.
Submitter comment: LEARNED FROM AN UNCLE, JOHN FURR.
Data entry tech comment: GEMINI=TWINS
Where learned: INDIANA ; GREENFIELD
James Callow Keyword(s): LEO=LION, KING OF BEASTS. ; SYMBOLISM ; SYMBOLISM MM
| Subject headings: | Observation BELIEF -- Plant husbandry Farming |
Date learned: 11-23-1967
ACTIVITY-ASTRONOMY
ANYTHING PLANTED UNDER GEMINI, WILL BE ABUNDANT. / LEARNED FROM HIS FATHER.
IN ORDER TO GET A GOOD CROP OF CUCUMBERS, PLANT THE SEED UNDER PISCES. / LEARNED FROM HIS MOTHER.
PLANT POTATOES DURING THE SIGN OF CAPRICORN FOR GOOD POTATO YIELD; BUT ONLY WHEN THE POINTS OF THE MOON POINT DOWNWARD. / LEARNED FROM HIS FATHER.
IF YOU DO NOT WANT POTATOES TO GROW TOO DEEP, PLANT THEM IN THE QUARTER OF THE MOON DURING ARIES. / LEARNED FROM HIS FATHER.
PLANT TOMATOES UNDER LIBRA AND THEY WOULD BE LARGE AND HEAVY. / LEARNED FROM HIS MOTHER.
Data entry tech comment: GEMINI=TWINS ; PISCES=FISH, WATER SIGN. ; LIBRA=SCALES--BALANCE
Where learned: INDIANA ; South Bend
James Callow Keyword(s): SYMBOLISM
| Subject headings: | Observation BELIEF -- Plant husbandry Farming |
Date learned: 11-23-1967
THERE IS AN OLD SUPERSTITION THAT MY MOTHER RELATED
TO ME BACK WHEN I GOT MY FIRST CAR. I HAD JUST
BOUGHT A ST. CHRISTOPHER MEDAL TO PUT ON THE
DASHBOARD. AS I WAS PLACING IT THERE, MY MOTHER
CAME UP AND SAID, "YOU KNOW, THERE IS AN OLD BELIEF
THAT WHEN YOU HIT EIGHTY, OLD ST. CHRISTOPHER GETS
UP AND LEAVES YOU ON YOUR OWN."
James Callow Keyword(s): AUTOMOBILE
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Religious hero BELIEF -- Product or activity of man or animal |
Date learned: 05-22-1965
BAPTISM CUSTOM
THOSE WHO STAND UP AT YOUR WEDDING SHOULD BE ASKED TO BE THE
GODPARENTS OF AT LEAST YOUR FIRST CHILD.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): BEST MAN ; MATRON OF HONOR ; WITNESSES
| Subject headings: | CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Baptism Naming rite |
Date learned: 10-26-1969
PROVERBIAL METAPHOR
IF YOU WANT TO DANCE, YOU MUST PAY THE FIDDLER.
YOU DON'T GET NOTHING FOR NOTHING IN THIS WORLD.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): ADVICE
James Callow Keyword(s): DOUBLE NEGATIVE
| Subject headings: | PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor |
Date learned: 11-07-1971
IF YOU WOULD HAVE A CHICKEN LAY, YOU FIRST MUST HEAR HER
CACKLE.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT'S UNCLE HAS TOLD HIM THIS PROVERB OFTEN. HIS UNCLE
OWNS A CHICKEN FARM AND INFORMANT BELIEVES HIS GREAT UNCLE
WAS THE ORIGINATOR OF THIS SAYING.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): ADVICE ; ANIMALS ; BIRTH
| Subject headings: | PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor |
Date learned: 03-28-1971
VERSE
DOWN TO THE PRESS THE PUWICE GOES (QUINCE?)
AND'S PRESSED TILL OUT THE CIDER FLOWS
IT FLOWS INTO THE CIDER TANKS
MONSTROUS FELLOWS ALL IN RANKS. MM
THEN THEY THE BARRELS WITH CIDER FILL
AND FREIGHT TRAINS TAKE IT FROM THE MILL
THEY FREIGHT IT TO SOME DISTANT TOWN
WHERE OLD TOPERS DRINK IT DOWN.
Where learned: BURLINGAME ; FAMILY JOURNAL
Keyword(s): DRINKING ; HUMOR ; RHYME DOUBLE ; RHYME: AABBCCDD
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Food Drink C855.443 |
Date learned: 11-08-1969
A SWARM OF BEES IN MAY
IS WORTH A LOAD OF HAY;
A SWARM OF BEES IN JUNE,
IS WORTH A SILVER SPOON.
A SWARM OF BEES IN JULY,
ISN'T WORTH A FLY.
Submitter comment:
ANOTHER OLD SAYING OF HIS FATHER, CLOSELY LINKED TO THE
TIME WHEN BEES PRODUCE THE MOST HONEY.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): COUPLET ; HONEY ; INCOME ; MONTHS OF YEAR ; OBSERVATION ; PREDICTION
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Belief Belief |
Date learned: 03-10-1968
OLD MOTHER HUBBARD
OLD MOTHER HUBBARD
WENT TO THE CUPBOARD
TO GET HER POOR DAUGHTER A DRESS,
BUT WHEN SHE GOT THERE
THE CUPBOARD WAS BARE,
AND SO WAS HER DAUGHTER, I GUESS.
Data entry tech comment: PARODY
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): COUPLET ; NURSERY RHYME PARODY ; OBSCENE ; SURPRISE ENDING
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Autograph Verse |
Date learned: 00001960S LATE
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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
THIS IS MY RIFLE, THIS IS MY GUN,
THIS IF FOR FIGHTING, THIS IS FOR FUN.
Submitter comment:
THIS VERSE HAS BEEN AROUND LONGER THAN I CAN REMEMBER. IT IS
SAID TO HAVE ORIGINATED IN A BOOT CAMP DURING WORLD WAR II,
WHEN A SGT. GOT P.O'D AT A BOOT (BUCK PRIVATE) FOR CALLING
HIS RIFLE A GUN. TO TEACH THE BOOT A LESSON, THE SGT. MADE
HIM WALK AROUND CAMP WITH NO PANTS ON, HIS RIFLE IN ONE HAND,
HIS PENIS IN THE OTHER RECITING THE ABOVE VERSE.
Keyword(s): HUMOR ; METONOMY ; MNEMONIC ; OBSCENE ; SEX ; WEAPONS
James Callow Keyword(s): ANGER ANGRY ; SERGEANT
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Custom Festival C840.549 Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1960
IRISH LEGEND
IT SEEMS THAT MY GRANDMOTHER KNEW A WOMAN IN IRELAND WHO TOLD HER
THE STORY OF HER SON. ONE DAY WHEN THE LITTLE BOY WAS BEING CHASTISED
HE RAISED HIS HAND IN ANGER TO HIS MOTHER. SHORTLY THEREAFTER THE
LITTLE BOY DIED. A FEW DAYS AFTER HE WAS BURIED HIS MOTHER WAS CALLED
TO THE GRAVE SITE. THERE WAS THE LITTLE BOY'S HAND STICKING UP OUT
OF THE GROUND. A PRIEST WAS SUMMONED AND AFTER A SERIES OF RITUALS
AND APPLICATIONS OF HOLY WATER THE HAND RECEDED INTO THE GROUND. THIS
INCIDENT OF COURSE WAS AN EXAMPLE FOR THE TOWNSPEOPLE OF WHAT
HAPPENS TO CHILDREN WHO DO NOT RESPECT THEIR PARENTS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): BODY PART
| Subject headings: | Favorites PROSE NARRATIVE -- Body part Senses BELIEF -- Street Trip Relations between relatives, friends, host and guest Social class Rank BELIEF -- Death Funeral Burial |
Date learned: 00-00-1937
A DIABOLICAL POSSESSION
THERE WAS A GIRL WHO ENTERED A CONVENT SOMEWHERE
IN EUROPE. SHE SEEMED
TO ACT SO STRANGELY THAT THE EXTIRE COMMUNITY WONDERED. ONE
EVENING SHE WALKED UP THE WALL AND SLITHERED ACROSS THE CEILING LIKE
A SNAKE. ON THE FOLLOWING MORNING SHE WAS DISMISSED AND AS SHE LEFT
THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR SHE DECLARED THAT SHE HAD GIVEN HER SOUL TO
THE DEVIL.
Submitter comment:
MY INFORMANT CLAIMS TO HAVE OBTAINED THIS INFORMATION FROM
ANOTHER SISTER WHO IN TURN CLAIMED TO HAVE SEEN THE INCIDENT
DESCRIBED ABOVE.
Where learned: SAINT JOSEPH CONVENT
Keyword(s): POSSESSION BY THE DEVIL
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Devil Demon |
Date learned: 00-00-1962
LIVING LEGEND
VINCE LOMBARDY IS REGARDED BY MANY FOOTBALL FANS AS A MIRACLE
MAN. NATURALLY, SINCE HE PERFORMS MIRACLES, IT IS LOGICAL THAT
HE WOULD BE LIKENED TO GOD. IT SEEMS THAT VINCE RETURNED HOME
ONE COLD NIGHT IN GREEN BAY. HIS WIFE HAD ALREADY RETIRED, SO HE
JUST CRAWLED INTO BED. HIS WIFE AWOKE AND EXCLAIMED "GOD ARE
YOUR FEET COLD." VINCE TURNED OVER AND SAID, "THAT'S ALL RIGHT,
HONEY. WE'RE HOME NOW. YOU CAN CALL ME VINCE."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): FOOTBALL JOKE
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Secular hero PROSE NARRATIVE -- Man |
Date learned: 00-00-1966