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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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GRANDPA REMEMBERS WHEN HIS MOTHER USED TO CUT PAPER SQUARES,
ABOUT 8 INCHES BY 8 INCHES EXACT. THIS WAS AFTER THE SUNDAY
PAPERS HAD BEEEN READ. AFTER JUDGING THE PILE SHE SAID, "SON
ATTACH THIS PILE TO THE PEG IN THE OUTHOUSE."

Submitter comment: THESE PAPERS WERE USED AS TOILET PAPER.

Where learned: DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): FUNCTIONAL SHIFT: NEWSPAPERS CONVERTED INTO TOILET PAPER

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Home

Date learned: 10-07-1972

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TRUE RIDDLE

Q: IT IS BLACK AND WHITE AND RED ALL OVER.
A: AN EMBARRASSED ZEBRA.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; RENO HALL LOBBY

Keyword(s): ANIMAL (A) ; LITERAL ; NATURAL PHENOMENON (Q) COLOR

James Callow Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER RIDDLE, VARIAN OF ; SPELLING: RED FOR READ

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- True Riddle

Date learned: 10-01-1968

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NON ORAL RIDDLE

Q: WHAT IS THIS? .
A: A GHOST WITH A CINDER IN HIS EYE.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): COMMUNICATIONS AND RELATED MATTER (Q) ; PERSONS (A) ; VISUAL

James Callow Keyword(s): VISUAL RIDDLE -- PERIOD OR DOT ON PAPER

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- True Riddle

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RIDDLE

WHY DID THE MAN THROW HIS PANTS OUT THE WINDOW?
BECAUSE A MAN WAS YELLING, "FREE PRESS"

Where learned: SAINT LEONARD SCHOOL ; DETROIT, ASSUMED

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER NAME ; PUN ON PRESS

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 11-15-1965

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RIDDLE

WHY DID THE MAN THROW HIS PANTS OUT THE WINDOW?
HE HEARD A BOY CALLING FREE PRESS

Where learned: SAINT LEONARD SCHOOL ; DETROIT, ASSUMED

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER NAME

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 09-20-1965

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Entry filtered.

MORON JOKE

WHY DID THE MORON THROW HIS PANTS OUT OF THE WINDOW?
HE HEARD SOMEONE YELLING, FREE PRESS

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; WARREN

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER NAME ; PUN

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

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NUN'S TALE

IF A GIRL SITS ON A BOY'S LAP, SHE SHOULD PUT A PHONE BOOK BENEATH
HER UNLESS THE GUY IS HER FATHER OR A RELATIVE, IN WHICH CASE A NEWS-
PAPER WILL BE SUFFICIENT, ACCORDING TO THE NUNS.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER SITTING

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Street Trip Relations between relatives, friends, host and guest Social class Rank

Date learned: 02-12-1968

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Entry filtered.

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

WHY DID THE LITTLE MORON THROW HIS PANTS OUT
THE WINDOW?
BECAUSE HE HEARD SOMEONE YELLING "FREE PRESS."

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman

Date learned: 01-29-1968

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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

WHY DID THE MORON THROW HIS PANTS OUT THE WINDOW?
HE HEARD A BOY CALLING, "FREE PRESS!"

Submitter comment:

I HEARD THIS JOKE MANY TIMES AS A YOUNGSTER. ODDLY
ENOUGH, I NEVER CAUGHT ON TO IT UNTIL I WAS IN HIGH
SCHOOL.

Where learned: MICHIGAN

James Callow Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER.

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman

Date learned: 00001950S

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Entry filtered.

Poor Wording

A number of GI's in England during the war decided to hold a horse race to keep up the morale of the base. For some reason they were short of active animals for the event. Now it happened that the local parish priest had a donkey and they obtained his permission to use it to make up the field. The donkey to the surprise of everyone came in third in the first race. Where upon the camp newspaper came out with the headline "Padre's Ass Shows."

This naturally caused no small scandal among the people of the parish and eventually reached the bishop. However, when called to ask about it by the bishop the padre managed to mollify the good man by explaining it was only an American slang expression. The next day a race was held and the donkey came in first. The paper then announced "Padre's Ass Out in Front."

This called for further episcopal disapproval, but again the padre succeeded in mollifying the bishop. The third day's race the donkey finished second and the paper reported "Padre's Ass back in Place." This was the last straw for the bishop and he ordered the priest to withdraw the animal from the race. The camp then came forth with the sad news: "Bishop Scratches Padre's Ass."

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Original BN [ B667 ] modified: the number zero is written over the seven. Additionally, the entire BN is crossed out and replaced with B660.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): AMERICAN ; Anecdote ; Culture Clash ; DONKEY ; European ; GAMBLING ; HORSE ; Jest ; Language ; MILITARY ; NEWSPAPER ; PUN ; RACING ; RELIGION ; SLANG

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote
Filter - Mature Content

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Prank

TeePee-ing Houses:

A group of people go to a house late at night and throw toilet paper up into the trees, decorate the shrubbery and generally create a real mess.

Submitter comment:

This was done to my house by a group of friends who had attended Roosevelt High School in Wyandotte, MI. It was done in May of 1968. It seems that this was not an uncommon practice for them to do to their friends.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Where learned: Myself

Keyword(s): Amusement ; CUSTOM ; Diversion ; Entertainment ; JOKE ; PRACTICAL JOKE ; Prank ; Shrubbery ; Toilet Paper

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Entertainment Diversion

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Language: Rhyme

Married Rhyme:

When you get married and live in a shack,

Send me your money in a paper sack.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): Language ; MARRIAGE ; MONEY ; Paper ; RHYME ; Sack ; Shack ; VERSE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- C70o

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Autograph Rhyme

Gradeschool Autograph:

When you get married and live in a holler: Send me a kiss on a paper dollar.

Submitter comment:

Collected from my grade school autograph book.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): AUTOGRAPH ; Dollar ; KISS ; Married ; Paper ; RHYME ; Signature ; VERSE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Verse without Music

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Language

School Vocabulary;

"brown bagging it'

Carrying your lunch in a paper sack.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): Bag ; Brown ; Colloquialism ; Language ; Lunch ; Nickname ; Paper ; Sac ; SCHOOL ; SLANG ; Vernacular ; Vocabulary

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Vocabulary

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riddle

Question: What's black and white and red all over?

Answer: A newspaper.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): Black ; COLOR ; Homophone ; Language ; NEWSPAPER ; PLAY ON WORDS ; PUN ; Read ; Red ; RIDDLE ; White ; WORDPLAY

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

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Language: Rhyme

While rocks and hills divide us,

And you no more I see

Just take your pen and paper,

And write a line to me.

Submitter comment:

Found in an autograph book from the 1880's

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): Album ; AUTOGRAPH ; DISTANCE ; Hills ; Language ; Paper ; Pen ; poem ; RHYME ; Signature ; VERSE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse Lyrical Verse

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Riddle

What's black and white and red all over?

Variations of answers:

1) Newspaper
2) Skunk with a diaper rash
3) Penguin with a sunburn
4) Blushing zebra

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs Added by TRD

Where learned: TENNESSEE ; NASHVILLE

Keyword(s): Black ; Blush ; Brain Teaser ; COLOR ; Diaper Rash ; JOKE ; NEWSPAPER ; PLAY ON WORDS ; PUN ; Red ; RIDDLE ; SKUNK ; Sunburn ; White ; WORDPLAY ; Zebra

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

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Saying

When someone says "I thought..." you say "You know what Mr. Thought did."

They probably will want to know what he did so you tell him: "He thought a razor blade was toilet paper and he cut his behind."

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs Added By TRD

James Callow comment:

Original BN [V501] crossed out. Replaced with current classification.

Taste??

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): Answer ; Maxim ; PROVERB ; QUESTION ; razor ; RETORT ; Saying ; Think ; Thought ; Toilet Paper

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula

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Entry filtered.

HOW CAN YOU TELL WHEN YOUR DRIVING THROUGH A POLISH
NEIGHBORHOOD?
THE TOILET PAPER IS ON THE CLOTHSLINE DRYING.

Data entry tech comment:

Updated by TRD

Where learned: TENNESSEE ; NASHVILLE

Keyword(s): ETHNIC SLUR ; JOKE ; Neighborhood ; POLISH ; Toilet Paper

Subject headings: --
RIDDLE -- Riddle Question
Filter - Mature Content

Date learned: 04-00-1972

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IF YOU SEE A PAPER CLIP AND CONTINUOUSLY KEEP PICKING
IT UP ALL DAY YOU WILL HAVE GOOD LUCK.

Data entry tech comment:

Updated by TRD

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT

Keyword(s): GOOD LUCK ; LUCK ; Paperclip ; SIGN ; SUPERSTITION ; SYMBOL

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Good luck Objects

Date learned: 03-00-1982

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