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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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FARMER WITH TROUBLE

A FARMER HAD THREE SONS WHO WORKED VERY HARD ON THE FARM AND DID
NOT SEEM TO HAVE ANY ENEW JERSEYOYMENT OTHERWISE. SO THE OLD GENT,
FIGURED
D HE HAD TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT, AND HE SUGGESTED THEY CLEAN UP
THE BACK FORTY WHERE THE COWS USUALLY HERDED AND MAKE A BASEBALL
DIAMOND SO THEY COULD INVITE THEIR FRIENDS TO PLAY BALL AND
PICNIC. SO, THE FIRST SUNDAY, BEFORE THE GAME WAS HALF OVER
ONE OF THE SONS CAME TO THE HOUSE, AND BROTHER, WAS HE A MESS.
THE OLD MAN ASKED WHAT HAPPENED. "WELL," THE SON SAID, "I HIT
ONE A COUNTRY MILE, THE COACH ON FIRST SAID KEEP GOING. WHEN I
REACHED SECOND THE COACH ON THIRD WAIVED ME TO COME AHEAD. THE
PLAY WAS CLOSE BUT I WAS CALLED OUT WHEN I SLID INTO WHAT I
THOUGHT WAS THIRD BASE. SO, HERE I AM."

Where learned: DETROIT, ASSUMED

James Callow Keyword(s): COW MANURE

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote

Date learned: 10-07-1972

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KNOCK KNOCK JOKE

KNOCK KNOCK
WHO'S THERE?
GRETTA
GRETTA WHO?
GRETTA LONG LITTLE DOGGIE-GRETTA LONG

Submitter comment: GEORGETOWN U. FROM FRIENDS

Where learned: GEORGETOWN UNIVERSITY

Keyword(s): COWBOY SONG ; NAME ; TITLE OR LINE FROM SONG: GET ALONG LITTLE DOGGIES

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 11-25-1967

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BIRDIE, BIRDIE IN THE SKY,
DROP A WHITE WASH IN MY EYE,
ME NO WORRY,
ME NO CRY,
ME JUST HAPPY COWS DON'T FLY.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT ; TOLD IN

Keyword(s): ANIMALS ; BABY TALK ; EUPHEMISM: WHITEWASH FOR BIRD DUNG ; RHYME: AABAA ; SUGGESTION COW DUNG

Subject headings: 730 Lyrical Verse
Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse

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Entry filtered.

POLISH JOKE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE POLISH TANK WITH FOUR GEARS?
IT HAS 3 REVERSE GEARS AND ONE FORWARD. THE FORWARD IS
IN CASE THE ENEMY ATTACKS FROM THE REAR.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): COWARDICE.

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman
BELIEF -- Poli

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Entry filtered.

POLISH JOKE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

YOU KNOW WHAT THEY CALL THE POLISH NAVY? CHICK OF THE
SEA.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): COWARDICE.

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman
BELIEF -- Poli

Date learned: 04-13-1967

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RIDDLE

WHY DOES A COW WEAR A BELL AROUND HER NECK?
ANSWER: HER HORN DOESN'T WORK.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ANIMALS: COWS ; RIDDLING QUESTION

James Callow Keyword(s): ALLUSION TO HORNS ON AUTOMOBILES ; PUN ON HORN

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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RIDDLE

WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS AN ELEPHANT AND A COW?
PEANUT BUTTER.

Submitter comment: LEARNED FROM A FRIEND.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ANIMALS: COWS ; ANIMALS: ELEPHANTS ; RIDDLE JOKE: CROSSING ONE THING WITH ANOTHER

James Callow Keyword(s): HYBRID

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 10-13-1967

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If you tip a cow when it is asleep the milk from that cow
will become sour.

Submitter comment: A farmer told our family this story when we stopped to
buy some fresh fruits and vegetables from his farm on our
way to Traverse City.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; TRAVERSE CITY

Keyword(s): drink, sour.

James Callow Keyword(s): cow tipping

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Entertainment Diversion
BELIEF -- Mammal

Date learned: 00-00-1983

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On Halloween, when the trick-or-treating is over you go and knock
over the cows and let the chickens out of their house. This is done
to the people who did not give out treats.

Submitter comment: This was done by friends in Mississippi during the 1960's.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): cow tipping

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- F103
BELIEF -- Mammal

Date learned: 00-00-1987

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HOMELY TALE

WHEN I WAS A LITTLE GIRL, OUR COW WOULDN'T LET A MAN
MILK IT. SO, MY GRANDFATHER SPENCE DRESSED UP IN A
SUNBONNET AND A MOTHER HUBBARD DRESS WHICH WAS A
LONG DRESS THAT TOUCHES THE FLOOR. BUT AS SOON AS
HE SAT TO MILK IT, THE COW KICKED THE BUCKET AND OFF
WENT THE COW. YOU COULDN'T FOOL THAT COW.

Where learned: TENNESSEE ; NASHVILLE

James Callow Keyword(s): DISGUISE FAILS TO FOOL COW ; TRANSVESTISM

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Product or activity of man or animal

Date learned: 07-21-1968

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THE COWARDLY COUNT

ONE TIME THERE WERE TWO COUNTRIES CARRYING ON A BLOODY WAR.
INTELLIGENCE REPORTS FROM THE SECRET SERVICE TOLD THE
GENERALS OF THE ONE COUNTRY THAT THEIR ENEMIES HAD A
SECRET WEAPON THAT THEY WERE PLANNING TO USE. IN ORDER TO
FIND OUT THIS SECRET WEAPON, THEYCAPTURED ONE OF THE ENEMIES'
HIGH RANKING COUNTS WHO HAD INFORMATION ON THIS WEAPON.
INTERROGATING HIM FOR HOURS, THEY COULD GET NO INFORMATION.
FINALLY, THEY THREATENED THE COUNT BY PUTTING HIM ON THE
CHOPPING BLOCK. THE EXECUTIONER HAD HIS AX READY TO BEHEAD
THE COUNT WHEN THE CHIEF INTERROGATOR GAVE THE LAST CHANCE
TO TELL THEM THE VALUABLE INFORMATION. AS THE COUNT REFUSED
AGAIN, THE SIGNAL WAS GIVEN FOR THE EXECUTIONER TO CUT OFF
THE COUNT'S HEAD. AS THE AX WAS COMING DOWN, THE COUNT
CHANGED HIS MIND AND CALLED OUT, "WAIT, WAIT. I'LL TELL YOU
EVERYTHING!" BUT BEFORE THE ORDER COULD BE REVERSED, SWISH,
THE HEAD WENT ROLLING OFF THE CHOPPING BLOCK. THE MORAL
OF THE STORY: DON'T HATCHET YOUR COUNTS BEFORE THEY CHICKEN.

Submitter comment: I HEARD THIS SEVERAL YEARS AGO, BUT DON'T REMEMBER FROM WHOM.

Where learned: NOT GIVEN

Keyword(s): COWARD

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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THE COWARDLY COUNT

ONE TIME THERE WERE TWO COUNTRIES CARRYING ON A BLOODY WAR.
INTELLIGENCE REPORTS FROM THE SECRET SERVICE TOLD THE
GENERALS OF THE ONE COUNTRY THAT THEIR ENEMIES HAD A
SECRET WEAPON THAT THEY WERE PLANNING TO USE. IN ORDER TO
FIND OUT THIS SECRET WEAPON, THEYCAPTURED ONE OF THE ENEMIES'
HIGH RANKING COUNTS WHO HAD INFORMATION ON THIS WEAPON.
INTERROGATING HIM FOR HOURS, THEY COULD GET NO INFORMATION.
FINALLY, THEY THREATENED THE COUNT BY PUTTING HIM ON THE
CHOPPING BLOCK. THE EXECUTIONER HAD HIS AX READY TO BEHEAD
THE COUNT WHEN THE CHIEF INTERROGATOR GAVE THE LAST CHANCE
TO TELL THEM THE VALUABLE INFORMATION. AS THE COUNT REFUSED
AGAIN, THE SIGNAL WAS GIVEN FOR THE EXECUTIONER TO CUT OFF
THE COUNT'S HEAD. AS THE AX WAS COMING DOWN, THE COUNT
CHANGED HIS MIND AND CALLED OUT, "WAIT, WAIT. I'LL TELL YOU
EVERYTHING!" BUT BEFORE THE ORDER COULD BE REVERSED, SWISH,
THE HEAD WENT ROLLING OFF THE CHOPPING BLOCK. THE MORAL
OF THE STORY: DON'T HATCHET YOUR COUNTS BEFORE THEY CHICKEN.

Submitter comment: I HEARD THIS SEVERAL YEARS AGO, BUT DON'T REMEMBER FROM WHOM.

Where learned: NOT GIVEN

Keyword(s): COWARD FEAR

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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SHAGGY DOG STORY (WITH A MORAL)

A COUNT IN THE DAYS OF OLD WAS ACCUSED OF STEALING FROM
THE KING AND SENTENCED TO BE BEHEADED FOR HIS CRIME. HE
IS TAKEN UP TO THE HIGHEST TOWER IN THE CASTLE OF THE KING
AND HIS HEAD IS SET ON THE CHOPPING BLOCK. THE AXMAN TURNS
TO HIM AND SAYS, "WILL YOU ADMIT THAT YOU DID THE STEALING
BEFORE I MUST BEHEAD YOU?" AND THE COUNT DENIES IT. AGAIN,
AFTER A FEW SECONDS, THE AXMAN PLEADS, "TELL THAT YOU DID
THE STEALING AND YOU WILL BE RELEASED." AGAIN, THE COUNT
REFUSES TO TELL AND THE AXMAN PREPARED TO LIFT THE BLADE.
JUST AS THE AX GOES DOWN, THE COUNT SCREAMS OUT, "I DID IT."
BUT IT IS TOO LATE TO RECALL THE AX, AND HE IS BEHEADED.
THE MORAL OF THIS STORY IS AS FOLLOWS: "DON'T HATCHET
YOUR COUNTS BEFORE THEY CHICKEN."

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; SAGINAW

Keyword(s): FEAR COWARD

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 03-27-1971

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(PROVERB)

THERE ONCE WAS A KING WHO HAD A COUNT SUSPECTED OF WITH-
HOLDING HIS PAYMENTS TO THE KING. THE KING THREATENED
HIM WITH THE AWE {AXE} IF HE WOULDN'T CONFESS TO WITHHOLDING.
THEN ONE DAY HE WAS DETERMINED TO GO THROUGH WITH IT. HE
HAD THE COUNT DRAGGED UP TO THE BLOCK AND STRAPPED IN.
"I'LL GIVE YOU ONE LAST CHANCE," SAID THE KING, BUT THE
COUNT SAID NOTHING.
THE KING TOLD THE HEADSMAN TO READY HIS AXE. AS THE AXE
WAS RAISED OVER THE COUNT'S NECK, THE KING SAID: "I'LL
GIVE YOU ONE MORE CHANCE." BUT THE COUNT STILL SAID
NOTHING. THE KING TOLD THE HEADSMAN TO CHOP. AS THE
BLADE WAS COMING DOWN, THE COUNT YELLED: "WAIT!" BUT IT
WAS TOO LATE.
THIS ONLY GOES TO SHOW THAT YOU SHOULDN'T HATCHET YOUR
COUNTS BEFORE THEY CHICKEN.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT

Keyword(s): FEAR COWARD

Subject headings: 6677 Formula Tale

Date learned: 11-02-1970

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Superstition: Animals

There is said to exist an animal which is snake-like in form and which crawls up a cows leg and drinks all her milk. This it has its name the milk-snake.

Submitter comment:

A Sly Poacher
and Item Card are written in the top left hand and right hand corners of the card, respectively. A Sly Poacher is crossed out.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Original BN [P440] has been crossed out. Replaced with current classification.

Keyword(s): BELIEF ; Cow ; Drink: consumption ; FOOD ; Milk ; PUN ; Serpent ; Snake ; SUPERSTITION

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Animal

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Toast

Good health to you, and then to me, and then to the cow in the ditch.

Submitter comment:

This toast rhymes when it is said in Polish

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Where learned: HOME ; MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): Cow ; Ditch ; DRINKING ; ETHNIC ; HEALTH ; POLISH ; Social ; TOAST

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Speech Speech
SPEECH -- Formula

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Retort

And the cow jumped over the moon.

Submitter comment:

To an absurd story.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

James Callow comment:

Small grammatical correction.

Keyword(s): COMEBACK ; Cow ; Fanciful ; INSULT ; MOON ; RETORT ; SARCASM ; Wisecrack

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula

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Belief: Weather

When an entire group or herd of cows is seen laying down in the pasture it is  said to be a prediction of coming rain.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): ANIMAL ; BELIEF ; Cow ; PREDICTION ; Rain ; WEATHER

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Weather sign or control

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Autograph Rhyme

Album Rhymes:

When you are very old and grat

I want you to remember the day

That I said you are my good friend.

Yours till the cows come home.

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): Age, Gray ; Album ; AUTOGRAPH ; COLOR ; Cows ; Devotion ; FRIENDSHIP ; Home ; LOVE ; RHYME ; Signature ; VERSE

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Verse without Music

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Language

In some country places stepping into cow manure is called "cutting your foot."

Data entry tech comment:

Motifs added by TRD

Keyword(s): Colloquialism ; COUNTRY ; Cow ; Cutting ; Foot ; MANURE ; REGIONAL ; SLANG ; Step ; Term

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Vocabulary of Special Group

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