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POLLACK JOKE
WHAT DO THEY DO WITH IDIOT POLLACKS?
THEY SEND THEM TO TEACH SCHOOL IN ITALY.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT THINKS HE HEARD THIS AT UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
CAMPUS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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POLLACK JOKE
DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE DEFINITION OF GROSS IGNORANCE IS?
IT'S A HUNDRED AND FOURTY-FOUR POLLACKS.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT HEARD THIS JOKE ON CAMPUS, UNIVERSITY OF
DETROIT. SHE DID NOT KNOW WHEN.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 03-00-1965
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POLLACK JOKE
HOW DO YOU TAKE A CENSUS IN HAMTRAMCK?
YOU FLOOD THE BASEMENTS.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT HEARD THIS ON UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT CAMPUS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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VARIANT OF POLITICAL-BIBLICAL ALLEGORY
THE INFORMANT IS A FIFTEEN YEAR OLD SOPHOMORE IN A
DETROIT COLLEGE PREP SCHOOL. HE RELATED THE STORY TO
ME WHEN WE WERE ON THE SUBJECT OF CHANGING ATTITUDES
TOWARD HISTORICAL LEADERS. HE HEARD HIS FATHER
TELLING THE STORY:
FIVE THOUSAND YEARS AGO MOSES SAID TO THE CHILDREN OF
ISREAL, "PICK UP YOUR SHOVELS, MOUNT YOUR ASSES AND
CAMELS AND I WILL LEAD YOU TO THE PROMISED LAND."
FIVE THOUSAND YEARS LATER FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT SAID,
"LAY DOWN YOUR SHOVELS, SIT ON YOUR ASSES, LIGHT UP
A CAMEL, THIS IS THE PROMISED LAND." NOW, LYNDON
B. JOHNSON IS STEALING YOUR SHOVELS, KICKING YOUR
ASSES, RAISING THE PRICE OF CAMELS, AND GIVING AWAY
THE PROMISED LAND TO THE NIGGERS."
Submitter comment:
THIRTEEN YEARS AGO I HEARD THIS STORY FROM A
SOUTHERN WHITE RESTAURANT OWNER, EXCEPT AT THAT TIME
THE REPUBLICANS WERE THE ONES CASTIGATED INSTEAD
OF LYNDON B. JOHNSON (PRESIDENT).
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 03-09-1967
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AJAX WHITE NIGHT JOKE (COMMERCIAL CLEANSING PRODUCT)
WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THE AJAX WHITE KNIGHT RODE
THROUGH A JEWISH NEIGHBORHOOD?
HE BOUGHT A NEW SET OF ARMOUR WHOLESALE.
Submitter comment:
HEARD IN UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ARCHITECTURE DEPARTMENT.
Data entry tech comment:
ALLUSION TO TELEVISION COMMERCIAL FOR AJAX CLEANSING
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 03-07-1967
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AJAX WHITE NIGHT JOKE (COMMERCIAL CLEANSING PRODUCT)
WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THE AJAX WHITE KNIGHT RODE THROUGH A
NEGRO NEIGHBORHOOD?
HE GOT MUGGED.
Data entry tech comment:
ALLUSION TO TELEVISION COMMERCIAL FOR AJAX CLEANSING
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 03-07-1967
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AJAX WHITE NIGHT JOKE (COMMERCIAL CLEANSING PRODUCT)
WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THE AJAX WHITE KNIGHT RODE THROUGH AN
ITALIAN NEIGHBORHOOD?
THE DIRT WAS STRONGER.
Submitter comment:
HEARD IN U. OF D.'S ARCHITECTURE DEPARTMENT
Data entry tech comment:
ALLUSION TO TELEVISION COMMERCIAL FOR AJAX CLEANSING
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 03-07-1967
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POLLACK JOKE
HOW MANY POLLACKS DOES IT TAKE TO PAINT A HOUSE?
201; 200 TO LIFT THE HOUSE UP AND DOWN AND ONE TO
HOLD THE BRUSH.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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POLLACK JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE SEVEN FOOT POLLACK WHO DIED?
THEY ONLY HAD A SIX FOOT CASKET SO THEY GAVE HIM AN
ENEMA AND BURIED HIM IN A MATCH BOX.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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POLLACK JOKE
WHAT IS THE DEFINITION OF A DOPE RING?
FOUR POLACKS STANDING IN A CIRCLE HOLDING HANDS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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POLLACK JOKE
WHAT IS THE DEFINITION OF A DOPE PEDDLAR?
A STORK THAT DELIVERS POLISH BABIES.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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POLLACK JOKE
WHAT IS THE DEFINITION OF A POLISH LOUAH?
FOUR POLLACKS SITTING AROUND A CEPTIC TANK WITH STRAWS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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POLLACK JOKE
HOW MANY POLLACKS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
THREE. ONE TO HOLD THE BULB AND TWO TO TURN THE LADDER.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT HEARD THIS ON U. OF D.'S CAMPUS. HE DOES NOT KNOW WHEN.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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THE POLISH PROSTITUTE
WHAT DID THE POLISH PROSTITUTE GIVE HER DAUGHTER FOR
HER WEDDING GIFT?
THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STREET.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT DOES NOT KNOW WHEN OR WHERE HE HEARD THIS.
IT MAY HAVE BEEN ON THE UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT CAMPUS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
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AN INTERNATIONAL STORY
AN AMERICAN, AN IRISHMAN, A CHINAMAN, AND A RUSSIAN
ARE GATHERED IN A ROOM.
THE CHINAMAN RISES AND PROPOSES A TOAST. "I SALUTE
THE GREAT WALL OF CHINA. NO ONE HAS EVER GONE OVER
IT WITHOUT OUR HELP. TO EVERYONE BUT THAT DIRTY
AMERICAN IN THE CORNER." THE AMERICAN CHUCKLES.
THE IRISHMAN PROPOSES A ROAST. "I WANT TO HONOR THE
BEAUTIFUL GREEN ISLE OF ERIN WHICH HAS NEVER BEEN
DEFILED. TO EVERYONE BUT THAT DIRTY AMERICAN IN THE
CORNER." THE AMERICAN ROARS WITH LAUGHTER.
THE RUSSIAN RISES. "I TOAST THE GREAT, RED,
INVINCIBLE FLAG OF RUSSIA. IT HAS NEVER BEEN DEFACED.
TO EVERYONE EXCEPT THAT DIRTY AMERICAN." BY NOW THE
AMERICAN IS ROLLING ON THE FLOOR.
THE AMERICAN STANDS UP, GULPS HIS DRINK, AND THEN
PROPOSES A ROAST. "I SALUTE THE WORLD RENOWNED
AMERICAN BALD EAGLE. HE FLEW OVER THE GREAT CHINESE
WALL, SHIT ON THE GREEN GRASS OF IRELAND, AND WIPED HIS
ASS ON THE RUSSIAN FLAG."
Submitter comment:
HEARD THIS FROM A FRIEND IN SOUTHWEST DETROIT.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 11-00-1967
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A NEGRO STORY
A LITTLE JUNGLE BUNNY (NEGRO) WAS PLAYING WITH HIS
CHEMISTRY SET. SUDDENLY, IT EXPLODED AND MADE HIS
SKIN TURN WHITE. HE RAN IN THE HOUSE SCREECHING FOR
HIS MOMMY. SHE WAS COOKING AND DIDN'T LOOK AT HIM.
"GO 'WAY. GO BOTHER YO' DADDY FO' WHAT YOU WANTS."
HE RAN TO HIS DADDY. HE WAS WATCHING A BASEBALL GAME
AND DRINKING BEER. HE DIDN'T LOOK AT HIM. "I'SE
BUSY. GO BOTHER YO' MOMMY. GO 'WAY." THIS MADE
THE BOY MAD. "I'SE ONLY BEEN WHITE FO' FIVE MINUTES
AND ALREADY I HATES NIGGERS."
Submitter comment:
HARRY HEARD THIS STORY IN A DEARBORN BAR.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): DEROGATORY TERM ; RACISM
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale |
Date learned: 11-00-1967
A YOUNG MAN, WITH A CONSIDERABLE NUMBER OF FRIENDS WHO
LOVED JOKING AROUND, WAS TO GET MARRIED. HIS FRIENDS
THREW HIM A STAG PARTY THE NIGHT BEFORE THE BIG EVENT.
AT THIS PARTY, THEY SUCCEEDED IN GETTING THE GUY
COMPLETELY DRUNK, SO THAT HE PASSED OUT. NOW, ONE
OF THE GUYS AT THE PARTY WAS A MEDICAL STUDENT AND HE
CAME UP WITH THE IDEA FOR THE BEST JOKE OF ALL TIME.
HE WENT TO HIS CAR AND GOT HIS EQUIPMENT FOR MAKING
PLASTER CASTS. THEN HE AND THE REST OF THE PARTY WENT
TO WORK. WHEN THEY FINISHED, THE POOR FELLOW WAS IN
A COMPLETE CAST FROM THE SHOULDERS DOWN. THE ONLY PART
LEFT WITHOUT THE PLASTER CAST, WAS HIS COCK, WHICH WAS
LEFT DANGLING OUT. HIS FRIENDS THEN CARRIED THE STATUE
OVER TO HIS GIRLS HOUSE AND PROPPED HIM UP ON THE PORCH,
FACING THE DOOR. THEY THEN RANG THE DOORBELL AND TOOK
OFF. WHEN THE GIRL CAME TO THE DOOR, ALL HELL BROKE
LOOSE. NOBODY KNOWS WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED AFTER THAT,
BUT IT TOOK THREE MONTHS BEFORE THE WEDDING ACTUALLY
TOOK PLACE.
Submitter comment:
I HEARD THIS LITTLE ANECDOTE AT A STAG PARTY FOR ONE OF
MY FRATERNITY BROTHERS AND IT WAS RELATED TO ME AS
BEING FACTUAL.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PENIS
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 05-22-1965
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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
WHY DOES IT TAKE FIVE POLAKS TO POP POPCORN?
IT TAKES ONE TO DIRECT, AND FIVE TO SHAKE THE STOVE.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT HEARD THIS FROM A FRIEND OF HERS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 05-14-1965
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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE TWO POLACKS WHO WENT ICE
FISHING?
THEY CAME BACK WITH 250 POUNDS OF ICE.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT WAS TOLD THIS JOKE BY A FRIEND AT WORK.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
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THE ALLIGATOR
THIS GUY WALKS INTO A BAR WITH AN ALLIGATOR. HE SAID
TO THE BAR KEEP, "DO YOU SERVE NIGGERS?"
BAR KEEP, "YES."
"GIVE ME A BEER AND A COUPLE OF NIGGERS FOR MY
ALLIGATOR."
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT HEARD THIS JOKE WHILE HE WAS EMPLOYED AT
THE FORD MOTOR COMPANY DURING THE SUMMER OF 1964.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): DEROGATORY TERM ; RACISM
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 07-00-1964