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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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WHEN IN DOUBT - DON'T

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT ; DORMS

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim

Date learned: 00-00-1968

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MILT FAMEY

MILT FAMEY WAS A MAJOR LEAGUE PITCHER FOR THE BOSTON BEANS. HE HAD
BEEN WITH THE TEAM FOR 4 YEARS AND HAD NEVER PITCHED A GAME. THE
REASON FOR THIS WAS THAT JOE "LEFTY" SLINGER WAS ALSO WITH THE TEAM.
HE WAS THE WINNINGEST PITCHER IN THE MAJORS, PITCHING EVERY GAME FOR
THE BEANS. NEEDLESS TO SAY, MILT WAS GETTING PRETTY DISCOURAGED AND
HE TOOK TO DRINKING WHILE SITTING ON THE BENCH. HE AVERAGED ABOUT A
CASE OF BEER A GAME. HIS FIFTH YEAR FOR THE BEANS WAS NO DIFFERENT
THAN THE FIRST FOUR. LEFTY WAS PITCHING FLAWLESSLY AND MILT WAS
BECOMING AN ALCOHOLIC. THEN IT HAPPENED. IT WAS THE SEVENTH GAME OF
THE WORLD SERIES WITH THE BEANS LEADING 3 TO 0 OVER THE SMALLVILLE
GIANTS IN THE BOTTOM OF THE NINTH. THE GIANTS WERE AT BAT WITH ONE
OUT. THE NEXT BATTER LINED ONE RIGHT AT LEFTY. IT HIT HIM IN THE HAND
AND AFTER MAKING THE PUTOUT LEFTY COLLAPSED AND HAD TO BE CARRIED
OFF THE FIELD, SUFFERING A BROKEN HAND. IT WAS MILT'S BIG CHANCE TO
PROVE HIMSELF. UNFORTUNATELY, HE WAS STILL SITTING ON THE BENCH
DRINKING BEER AND THROWING THE EMPTY CANS OUT ON THE FIELD ALONG THE
THIRD BASE LINE. AFTER REALIZING WHAT HAD HAPPENED, HE STUMBLED OUT
ONTO THE FIELD TO THE PITCHER'S MOUND AND SHOUTED TO THE CATCHER TO
BRING 'EM ON. THE FIRST BATTER STEPPED UP AND MILT LEFT GO WITH HIS
FIRST PITCH WHICH SAILED THROUGH THE AIR ABOUT 15 FEET ABOVE THE
BATTER'S HEAD, AS DID THE NEXT 3 PITCHES. THE NEXT 2 BATTERS ALSO
GOT ON BASE THIS WAY. NOW THINGS WERE GETTING CLOSE. THE BASES WERE
LOADED WITH THE WINNING RUN AT THE PLATE. MILT KNEW HE HAD BETTER
START THROWING STRIKES SOON AND HE DID SO ON THE NEXT PITCH. THERE
WAS A LOUD CRACK AND THE BALL SAILED OUT OF THE PARK FOR A GAME
WINNING HOMERUN. AS THE BASERUNNERS ROUNDED THIRD THEY WERE BEGINNING
TO KICK THROUGH ALL OF MILT'S EMPTY BEER CANS. ONE OF THEM ASKED
WHERE ALL THE EMPTY CANS HAD COME FROM AND ANOTHER REPLIED "THAT'S
THE BEER THAT MADE MILT FAMEY WALK US".

Submitter comment: THIS STORY WAS TOLD WITH A GREAT AMOUNT OF HAND AND ARM MOVEMENT.
WOULD COME UNDER C1400-C1599 IN SHAGGY DOG INDEX (PUNCH LINE FROM
ADVERTISING). - J. T. CALLOW

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Product or activity of man or animal
PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale
SPEECH -- Gesture

Date learned: 00-00-1971

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IT IS A UKRAINIAN CUSTOM TO MIX POPPIES AND WHEAT TOGETHER AT
CHRISTMAS TIME. THEN TAKE THE MIXTURE IN A SPOON AND THROW IT IN THE
AIR AND TRY TO CATCH IT. IF YOU CATCH IT, YOU WILL HAVE GOOD LUCK.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; NORTH QUAD ; DORMS ; TOLD IN

Keyword(s): FOOD CUSTOM ; PREDICTION

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- December 21 solstice to March 20 Predictions
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- December 21 solstice to March 20 Single dishes
BELIEF -- Fate Destiny Luck Chance

Date learned: 02-07-1971

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CAR-WASHING

WHEN YOU'RE DONE WITH YOUR CAR, YOU CAN WASH MINE.

Submitter comment: WHILE WASHING MY CAR, APPROXIMATELY 12 PERSONS IN A 20 MINUTE PERIOD
USED THE ABOVE IN PLACE OF A GREETING.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DORMS ; TOLD IN ; PARKING LOT

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula

Date learned: 10-06-1970

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TOM SWIFTIE

I DON'T LIKE STICK SHIFT, TOM SAID AUTOMATICALLY.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DORMS ; TOLD IN

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Wellerism Quotation

Date learned: 01-00-1972

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PROVERBS

MOST OF US DON'T PUT OUR BEST FOOT FORWARD UNTIL WE GET THE OTHER
ONE IN HOT WATER.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT ; DORMS

James Callow Keyword(s): OBSERVATION

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor
PROVERB -- Proverbial Phrase

Date learned: 00-00-1968

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IT ALL COMES CLEAN IN THE WASH.

Submitter comment: MEANING: THE TRUTH WILL COME OUT.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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NECESSITY IS THE MOTHER OF INVENTION.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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VARIETY IS THE SPICE OF LIFE.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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IF YOUR NOSE ITCHES, YOU'RE GOING TO KISS A FOOL.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: Observation
BELIEF -- Body part Senses

Date learned: 00-00-1979

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IF YOU STEP ON A SPIDER IT WILL RAIN.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Animal
BELIEF -- Weather sign or control

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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IF YOUR EARS ARE RINGING, SOMEBODY IS TALKING ABOUT YOU.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: 842 Ringing ears / buzzing / hot, burning

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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IF YOUR HAND ITCHES, YOU ARE GOING TO PAY OUT MONEY.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Sensations and involuntary actions Itching hands and feet

Date learned: 00-00-1979

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IF YOU CARRY THE BABY HIGH, IT WILL BE A GIRL.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Birth

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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OYSTERS MAKE YOU FERTILE.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Animal
BELIEF -- Birth

Date learned: 00-00-1979

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OWL AT MIDNIGHT MEANS SOMEONE WILL DIE.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: Observation
BELIEF -- Bird
BELIEF -- Death Funeral Burial
BELIEF -- Measure of time WeekDayHour

Date learned: 00-00-1979

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IF YOU SPILL SALT, THROW IT OVER YOUR SHOULDER TO WARD OFF BACK LUCK.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Mineral
BELIEF -- Conversions P883.17

Date learned: 00-00-1979

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HONEY AND LEMON WITH WHISKEY FOR COLDS.(TEA IS OPTIONAL)

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Remedy

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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PICKLED HERRING AT MIDNIGHT ON NEW YEARS EVE AND PASS A SOLID SILVER
QUARTER TO YOUR NEIGHBOR WHILE KISSING.

Submitter comment: THIS IS A POLISH CUSTOM PRACTICED BY FRIENDS OF MINE.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- December 31 New Year's Eve
Food Drink -- Typical menus for the various meals For meal hours, see F574.84. Special or festive meals
BELIEF -- Mineral
SPEECH -- Gesture

Date learned: 00-00-1979

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BAYBERRY CANDLES BURNED ON NEW YEAR'S EVE FOR PROSPERITY
IN THE NEW YEAR.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT DORMS

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- December 31 New Year's Eve
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Measure of time Year

Date learned: 00-00-1978

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