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SONG
IF YOU SPRINKLE WHEN YOU TINKLE,
BE A SWEETY AND WIPE THE SEATY.
Where learned: NEW YORK ; CHEEKTOWAGA
James Callow Keyword(s): ADMONITION
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest |
Date learned: 12-00-1973
SONG
DRUNK, DRUNK, DRUNK, DRUNK,
DRUNK, DRUNK, DRUNK, DRUNK,
DRUNK LAST NIGHT, DRUNK THE NIGHT BEFORE,
GOING TO GET DRUNK TONIGHT, LIKE I'VE NEVER BEEN DRUNK BEFORE,
FOR WHEN I'M DRUNK, I'M AS HAPPY AS CAN BE,
'CAUSE I AM A MEMBER OF THE SAUSS FAMILY.
OH THE SAUSS FAMILY IS THE BEST FAMILY,
THAT EVER CAME OVER FROM OLD GERMANY,
THERE'S THE HIGHLAND DUTCH,
AND THE LOWLAND DUTCH,
THERE'S THE ROTTERDAM DUTCH,
AND THE OTHER DAMN DUTCH.
SINGING GLORIOUS, GLORIOUS
ONE KEG OF BEER FOR THE FOUR OF US.
SINGING GLORY BE TO GOD, THAT THERE AIN'T NO MORE OF US,
SO ONE OF US CAN DRINK IT ALL ALONE.
Where learned: NEW YORK ; CHEEKTOWAGA
James Callow Keyword(s): ANIMAL
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Social reunion Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Food Drink C855.447 |
Date learned: 12-00-1973
THE NEW ENGLAND DUCK
IN AN OLD ITALIAN TOWN, A LITTLE OLD LADY WALKED INTO A BUTCHER SHOP
AND ASKED FOR A NEW ENGLAND DUCK.
THE OWNER, WHO WAS A VERY FAMILIAR WITH ALL KINDS OF DUCKS, WAS VERY
PUZZLED. SO TO TRY TO HELP OUT THE LITTLE OLD LADY, HE HELD UP JUST
ANY OLD DUCK.
THE LADY TOOK HER THUMB AND STUCK IT IN THE "COOLOO" OF THE DUCK. SHE
PULLED IT OUT AND SAID, "NO, THIS ISN'T A NEW ENGLAND DUCK".
THE OWNER AGAIN GOT ANOTHER DUCK AND GAVE IT TO THE LITTLE OLD LADY.
SHE AGAIN TOOK HER THUMB AND INSERTED IT INTO THE DUCK'S "COOLOO" AND
SAID, "AH: THIS IS A NEW ENGLAND DUCK."
AS HE WRAPPED THE CHICKEN FOR THE LITTLE OLD LADY, HE ASKED HER IF
SHE WAS AN ITALIAN. SHE REPLIED, "VERY MUCH SO."
THE LITTLE OLD LADY, STILL PUZZLED AS TO HOW COME THE BUTCHER DIDN'T
KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A NEW ENGLAND DUCK AND THE OTHERS, ASKED
HIM WHERE HE CAME FROM.
THE BUTCHER PULLED DOWN HIS PANTS, BENT OVER AND SAID, "HERE- YOU
TELL ME!"
Submitter comment: FROM ITALY IN THE EARLY 1900'S
Where learned: BUFFALO ; NEW YORK
James Callow Keyword(s): ANIMAL
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote Food Drink -- Meat Bird Poultry |
Date learned: 11-00-1973
(KIND AND UNKIND STORY) ST. PETER STORY
ONCE UPON A TIME IN A SMALL TOWN IN SICILY, THERE LIVED A MEAN
STEPMOTHER WITH TWO DAUGHTERS, ONE OF WHOM WAS HER NATURAL DAUGHTER
AND THE OTHER WAS HER STEPDAUGHTER. HOWEVER, HER STEPDAUGHTER, BEING
THE PRETTIER OF THE TWO GIRLS, WAS ALWAYS IN THE KITCHEN SCRUBBING
THE POTS AND PANS AND DOING ALL THE DIRTY WORK THAT HAD TO BE DONE,
WHILE THE NATURAL DAUGHTER WAS JUST LAYING AROUND DOING NOTHING AND
GETTING SELFISH AND MORE SELF-CENTERED EVERY DAY. WELL, THIS
STEPMOTHER MADE THE BREAD FOR THE PEOPLE OF THE TOWN AND DELIVERY WAS
MADE DAILY BY HER TWO DAUGHTERS. ONE DAY AS THE BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTER
WAS WALKING DOWN THE ROAD, SHE MET AN OLD, BEARDED MAN SITTING ALONG
THE ROADSIDE. HE ASKED HER FOR A SMALL PIECE OF BREAD BECAUSE HE HAD
NOT EATEN FOR TWO DAYS. THE YOUNG GIRL TOOK PITY ON HIM AND GAVE HIM
THE WHOLE LOAF OF BREAD. HE THANKED HER AND TOLD HER IF SHE HEARD THE
ROOSTER CROW ONCE ON THE WAY HOME, SHE WAS NOT TO TURN AROUND. BUT,
IF THE ROOSTER CROWED TWICE, SHE WAS TO TURN AROUND QUICKLY. BEING AN
OBEDIENT GIRL, WHEN THE ROOSTER CROWED ONCE SHE KEPT RIGHT ON
WALKING, BUT WHEN SHE HEARD HIM CROW TWICE, SHE QUICKLY TURNED
AROUND AND AS SHE DID SO, A DIAMOND APPEARED IN THE MIDDLE OF HER
FOREHEAD MAKING HER MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN EVER. UPON RETURNING HOME
AND EXPLAINING WHAT HAPPENED TO HER STEPMOTHER, THE NATURAL DAUGHTER
WANTED TO GO THE SAME ROAD HER SISTER FOLLOWED THE DAY BEFORE.
HOWEVER, BEING SELFISH AND MEAN, WHEN THE POOR OLD MAN APPROACHED HER
AND ASKED FOR A MORSEL OF BREAD, SHE SPAT UPON HIM AND TRIED TO RUN
AWAY. THEREFORE, ANGERED BY HER ACTIONS, HE TOLD HER TO TURN AROUND
IF SHE HEARD THE ROOSTER CROW ONCE, AND TO WALK STRAIGHT AHEAD IF SHE
HEARD HIM CROW TWICE. UPON DOING THIS, AS SHE TURNED AROUND WHEN THE
ROOSTER CROWED ONCE, A BIG HORN GREW IN THE MIDDLE OF HER FOREHEAD,
MAKING HER UGLIER THAN SHE WAS BEFORE.
Submitter comment:
FROM ITALY IN THE EARLY 1900'S
THE MORAL OF THIS STORY IS TO SHARE WITH OTHERS AND HAVE PITY ON
THOSE LESS FORTUNATE THAN YOU, FOR THE LITTLE OLD MAN WAS REALLY ST.
PETER IN DISGUISE, SAID MY GRANDMOTHER.
Where learned: BUFFALO ; NEW YORK
James Callow Keyword(s): CONTRAST ; ITALY
| Subject headings: | Favorites PROSE NARRATIVE -- Religious hero PROSE NARRATIVE -- Magic |
Date learned: 10-00-1973
SONG
JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS,
JINGLE ALL THE WAY,
OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO RIDE,
IN A HORSE DRAWN CHEVROLET.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT ; TRAVERSE CITY ; CAMPUS
James Callow Keyword(s): AUTOMOBILE ; PARODY
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery |
Date learned: 12-00-1973
SONG
JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS,
JINGLE ALL THE WAY,
OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO RIDE,
IN A CRACKED UP CHEVROLET.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT ; TRAVERSE CITY ; CAMPUS
James Callow Keyword(s): AUTOMOBILE ; PARODY
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery |
Date learned: 12-00-1973
CHIQUITA BANANA
IM A CHIQUITA BANANA
AND IM HERE TO STAY
IF YOU WANT TO KILL YOUR TEACHER
I HAVE FOUND THE WAY.
EAT A BANANA.
PUT THE PEEL ON THE FLOOR
AND WATCH YOUR TEACHER FLY OUT THE DOOR.
(THIS IS SUNG TO THE TUNE OF THE CHIQUITA BANANA AD ON TV)
Submitter comment:
VIOLENCE AGAINST TEACHERS IS ALWAYS A POPULAR SUBJECT FOR GRADE
SCHOOL SONG PARODIES. IT IS ALSO COMMON FOR CHILDREN TO MAKE UP
PARODIES OF THE ADS ON TV SINCE THEY SEE THEM SO OFTEN.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PARODY OF ADVERTISEMENT
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery |
HI HO, HI HO
HI HO, HI HO,
IT'S OFF TO SCHOOL WE GO
WE LEARN SOME JUNK
AND THEN WE FLUNK
HI HO, HI HO, HI HO.
HI HO, HI HO
IT'S OFF TO CHURCH WE GO
WITH A BOTTLE OF BEER
AND A KICK IN THE REAR
HI HO, HI HO, HI HO.
HI HO, HI HO
I BIT THE TEACHER'S TOE
THE DIRTY RAT
SHE BIT ME BACK
HI HO, HI HO, HI HO.
Submitter comment:
CLAIRE SAYS SHE LEARNED THESE SONGS AT GIRL SCOUT CAMP. I ALSO
HEARD THE LITTLE GIRL I BABYSIT FOR SINGING THE THIRD ONE.
HER MOTHER TRIED TO STOP HER BY SAYING' "YOU SHOULDN'T SING SONGS
LIKE THAT. HOWEVER' I DON'T THINK THE MOTHER'S ADMONITION FAZED
THE LITTLE GIRL MUCH. IT WILL PROBABLY ONLY HELP TO IMPRINT THIS
SONG ON HER MIND.
James Callow comment:
HI HO= SONG FROM WALT DISNEY MOVIE "SNOW WHITE"
CK[ SATIRE OF EDUCATION
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): SATIRE OF EDUCATION
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Children |
Date learned: 00-01-1974
VERSE WITHOUT MUSIC
BOYS ARE ROTTEN/ MADE OF COTTON
GIRLS ARE DANDY/ MADE OF CANDY.
Submitter comment:
THE GIRLS IN MY FAMILY LOVE SAYING THIS VERSE. THE BOYS TEND TO
IGNORE IT. THE VERSE IS ALSO PREVALENT AROUND QUEEN OF HOPE SCHOOL
WHERE MY SISTER GOES.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): C730.328 ; FEMININE RHYME ; SEXISM
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse Lyrical Verse |
Date learned: 00-02-1974
THE FOLLOWING CONVERSATION TOOK PLACE BETWEEN A CUSTOMER AND A
WAITRESS IN A JEWISH RESTAURANT.
FUNEM?
SVFM.
FUNEX?
SVFX.
OKMNX.
TRANSLATION:
HAVE YOU ANY HAM?
YES, WE HAVE HAM.
HAVE YOU ANY EGGS?
YES, WE HAVE EGGS.
OK, HAM AND EGGS.
Submitter comment:
WHEN MY GREAT UNCLE TRIED THIS ON US NO ONE COULD GUESS IT JUST BY
LOOKING AT IT. HOWEVER, WHEN HE READ IT TO US USING EXPRESSION IT
WAS MUCH EASIER TO CATCH ON. THE ONLY PROBLEM WITH THIS "PUZZLE" IS
THAT IT IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO CATCH ON TO THE FIRST TIME YOU SEE
IT. THEN ONCE YOU ARE TOLD WHAT IT MEANS THE ELEMENT OF CURIOSITY IS
DESTROYED. ALMOST INVARIABLY PEOPLE WILL TRY TO READ EACH LINE
AS A WORD NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES YOU TELL THEM TO PRONOUNCE EACH
LETTER SEPARATELY.
Where learned: OHIO ; CINCINNATI
James Callow Keyword(s): JEWISH PRONUNCIATION OF ENGLISH
| Subject headings: | SPEECH -- Group of Vowels and Consonants, and of Words RIDDLE -- Riddle Question |
Date learned: 00001960S
PEANUTS--CONFESSION JOKE
1ST BOY: FATHER, I THREW PEANUTS IN THE ELEPHANT CAGE.
PRIEST: WELL THAT'S OK SON, NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.
2ND BOY: FATHER, I THREW PEANUTS IN THE ELEPHANT'S CAGE.
PRIEST: YES. I SEE.
3RD BOY: ...AND I THREW PEANUTS IN THE ELEPHANT'S CAGE.
PRIEST: I SEE, BUT THAT'S NOT A SIN.
4TH BOY COMES IN.
PRIEST: I SUPPOSE YOU'RE GOING TO TELL ME THAT YOU THREW PEANUTS
IN THE ELEPHANT'S CAGE. 5TH BOY: NO I'M NOT. I'M PEANUTS.
Submitter comment:
THIS IS MY GRANDMOTHER'S FAVORITE JOKE ABOUT CONFESSIONS. SHE'S
BEEN TELLING IT TO MY FAMILY EVER SINCE MY OLDER BROTHER WAS OLD
ENOUGH TO GO TO CONFESSION. BECAUSE SHE'S TOLD IT SO MANY TIMES
THERE ARE VARIATIONS EVEN WITHIN HER OWN TELLINGS. THE NUMBER OF
BOYS BEFORE PEANUTS MAY VARY AS WELL AS THE PRIEST'S COMMENTS.
SOMETIMES PEANUTS GETS THROWN INTO THE FOUNTAIN INSTEAD OF THE
ELEPHANT'S CAGE, BUT NATURALLY THE PUNCHLINE ALWAYS REMAINS THE
SAME.
Where learned: OHIO ; CINCINNATI
James Callow Keyword(s): NAME MISUNDERSTOOD
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00001960S
NARRATIVE SONG
DOCTOR, DOCTOR, CAN YOU TELL
WHAT WILL MAKE POOR (GAL'S NAME) WELL?
SHE IS SICK AND ABOUT TO DIE
AND THAT WOULD MAKE (HER BEAU'S NAME) CRY.
Submitter comment:
MY GREAT-AUNT PLAYED THIS ON THE PIANO AT ALL THE FAMILY PARTIES
THAT THEY HAD AT THEIR HOUSE. ALL THE KIDS WOULD JOIN IN THE
SINGING. IN THIS SONG THE NAME OF A GIRL COUSIN WAS ALWAYS FILLED
IN THE FIRST BLANK AND THEN A BOY COUSIN'S NAME WAS CHOSEN FOR THE
SECOND BLANK. NATURALLY NO ONE WAS REALLY SICK. THE OBJECT OF
THE SONG IS RATHER OBVIOUS--JUST PAIRING OFF THE GIRLS AND THE
BOYS WHO WERE THERE.
Where learned: OHIO ; CINCINNATI
James Callow Keyword(s): FUNCTION
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ballad, Song, Verse Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest |
Date learned: 00001960S
EPIPHANY CAKE
EACH YEAR ON EPIPHANY OUR FAMILY BAKES A CAKE WITH A RING INSIDE IT.
WHOEVER GETS THE RING IS SUPPOSED TO HAVE GOOD LUCK THROUGHOUT
NEW YEAR. WE HAVE BEEN DOING THIS CUSTOM IN MY FAMILY ON AND OFF
SINCE I WAS IN THE THIRD GRADE. I THINK ORIGINALLY IT MAY HAVE BEEN
A GERMAN CUSTOM.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): LUCKY FIND
| Subject headings: | CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- January 6 Twelfth Day Epiphany BELIEF -- Measure of time Year BELIEF -- Good luck P881.4 |
Date learned: CA 00001965
TWO, FOUR, SIX, EIGHT
TWO, FOUR, SIX, EIGHT
WHO DO WE APPRECIATE
OUR TEAM, OUR TEAM
RAH, RAH, RAH!
TWO, FOUR, SIX, EIGHT
WHO DO WE REALLY HATE?
THEIR TEAM, THEIR TEAM
RAH, RAH, RAH!
TWO FOUR, SIX, EIGHT, TEN
(NAME OF YOUR SCHOOL)'S GOING TO DO YOU IN.
O-O-O-H A-A-A-H
WE GOT THE POWER!
Submitter comment:
ALTHOUGH THESE ARE REALLY THREE SEPARATE CHEERS I COMBINED THEM
INTO ONE ITEM BECAUSE OF THEIR SIMILARITY TO EACH OTHER. THE
FIRST ONE IS THE TRADITIONAL CUB SCOUT BASEBALL CHEER FOR OUR AREA.
THE SECOND CHEER IS ALSO SAID BY THE CUB SCOUTS AND THEIR FANS IF
THEY ARE FEELING IN A PARTICULARLY NASTY MOOD. THE THIRD CHEER (AS
THE GREATER AMOUNT OF NUMBERS USED INDICATES)
IS SAID BY A SLIGHTLY
HIGHER EDUCACATIONAL GROUP. I'VE HEARD IT SAID MOST FREQUENTLY
AT HIGH SCHOOL GAMES.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): COUNTING
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Custom Festival Custom Festival |
BLUE MIST
IT IS BELIEVED THAT UPON A CERTAIN STREET IN GROSSE ILE, AT A
CERTAIN TIME, THE BLUE MIST DESCENDS UPON ANY CAR THAT TRESPASSES
THERE.
Submitter comment: THERE DOESN'T SEEM TO BE A STORY AS TO THE WHY OF THIS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; RIVERVIEW
James Callow Keyword(s): GROSSE ILE IS AN ISLAND IN THE DETROIT RIVER ; GROSSE ILE, MICHIGAN
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Cloud Fog Mist Rain Hail Ice Snow Frost Dew BELIEF -- Product or activity of man or animal |
Date learned: 01-00-1974
Language
FLAT ROCK IS CALLED BY DOWNRIVER PEOPLE WHO DON'T LIVE IN FLAT ROCK
LEVEL PEBBLE.
Submitter comment:
JUST RECENTLY.
A TOWN SOME 25 MILES SOUTH OO DETROIT, MICHIGAN.; FLAT ROCK, MICHIGAN; THIS ITEM REFERS TO FLAT ROCK, MICHIGAN,
Data entry tech comment:
Motifs added by TRD 02-22-2011
James Callow comment:
INCOMPLETE COMMENT?
CN[ PARTIPILO, FRANK 720870
C1[ 14909 STONEHAM
C2[ RIVERVIEW, MICHIGAN 48192
CO[ JUST RECENTLY.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; RIVERVIEW
Keyword(s): Flat ; Language ; Level ; MICHIGAN ; Nickname ; Pebble ; Region ; REGIONAL ; Rock ; SLANG ; STATE
| Subject headings: | SPEECH -- Place |
Date learned: 01-00-1974
THE STIGMATA OF PADRE PIO
PADRE PIO OF SAN GIOVANNI DI ROTONDO IN ITALY HAS THE STIGMATTA OF
OUR LORD ON HIS HANDS. THE WOUNDS ARE SAID TO BE OPEN ABOUT ONCE A
MONTH. ALSO ONLY MEN WERE ALLOWED TO SEE THIS. THE REASON FOR
THIS IS UNKNOWN.
Submitter comment:
I ALSO HAD A CHANCE WHILE IN ITALY IN 72, TO SEE THIS SIGHT, HOWEVER
I CANNOT ACCOUNT FOR IT. THE WOUNDS WERE OPEN AND BLEEDING AS HE SAID
MASS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; RIVERVIEW
James Callow Keyword(s): BELIEF ; SEXISM ; STIGMATA
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Religious hero |
Date learned: 01-00-1974
GARDEN GATE JOKE
DON'T KISS YOUR GIRL BY THE GARDEN GATE,
CAUSE LOVE IS BLIND BUT THE NEIGHBORS AIN'T.
Submitter comment:
SHE EMPHASIZED THAT THIS WAS A STRICT RULE OF THOUGHT BACK WHEN SHE
WAS YOUNG. HOWEVER SHE DID GIGGLE AS SHE RECITED IT, GIVING THE
IMPRESSION THAT SHE WAS PULLING MY LEG.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DELRAY ; DETROIT ; ETHNIC SECTION
James Callow Keyword(s): ADVICE ; OBSERVATION
| Subject headings: | 730 Lyrical Verse |
Date learned: 01-00-1974
THE TISSUE PRANK
ASK A PERSON TO SAY TERRIFIED. THEN ASK THEM TO SAY TISSUE. THEN ASK
THEM TO SAY IT TOGETHER. WHEN THEY SAY TERRIFIED TISSUE, ANSWER WITH
NO GO RIGHT AHEAD
Submitter comment:
AS SHE FINISHED THIS JOKE WITH MYSELF AS THE PERSON IT WAS PULLED ON
SHE STOOD THERE WITH HER EYES CLOSED AND HER LIPS PUCKERED.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; RIVERVIEW
James Callow Keyword(s): KISS
| Subject headings: | CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Entertainment Diversion |
Date learned: 01-00-1974
SMALL CHANGE FOR GOOD LUCK.
AN OLD MALTESE CUSTOM SAYS, PUT SMALL CHANGE ON THE WINDOW SILL
BEFORE THE NEW YEAR COMES. LEAVE IT THERE UNTIL AFTER THE NEW YEAR
SO THAT YOU'LL HAVE FINANCIAL GOOD LUCK THAT YEAR.
Submitter comment:
EVEN THOUGH THE INFORMANT DIDN'T BELIEVE THE WART
CURE {PREVIOUS ENTRY}, SHE SEEMED TO
BELIEVE THIS ONE, JUST BY THE WAY SHE SAID IT.
SHE GOT THIS ITEM FROM HER MALTESE HUSBAND.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; RIVERVIEW
James Callow Keyword(s): BELIEF
Date learned: 01-00-1974