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POLISH JOKES
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
TWO POLACKS WERE WALKING DOWN THE STREET AND THEY SEEN THIS
POSTER WHICH READ, "WANTED FOR RAPE" AND THERE WAS A PICTURE
OF A NEGRO UNDER THE WORDS. THE ONE POLACK LOOKED AT THE
OTHER AND SAID, "Y'KNOW, THOSE NIGGERS GET ALL THE GOOD JOBS."
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
A MAN WENT TO SEE A CONTRACTOR ABOUT BUILDING A HOUSE.
THE CONTRACTOR BEGAN TO ASK THE MAN A FEW BASIC QUESTIONS.
"HOW MANY WINDOWS DO YOU WANT IN THE HOUSE?"
"SIX"
"THE CONTRACTOR SAID "EXCUSE ME." HE WENT OVER TO THE WINDOW
AND YELLED, "GREEN SIDE UP, GREEN SIDE UP."
HE CAME BACK, SAT DOWN AND ASKED THE MAN, "HOW MANY DOORS DO
YOU WANT IN YOUR HOUSE?"
"THE MAN SAID THREE."
AGAIN THE CONTRACTOR WENT TO THE WINDOW AND YELLED, "GREEN
SIDE UP, GREEN SIDE UP. HE CAME BACK, SAT DOWN AND WAS ABOUT
TO ASK ANOTHER QUESTION.
THE MAN WHO WANTED THE HOUSE BUILT SAID' "HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON
HERE? I MEAN' I'M TELLING YOU ALL THESE THINGS I WANT DONE FOR
MY HOUSE AND YOU KEEP GOING TO THE WINDOW SAYING, 'GREEN SIDE UP,
GREEN SIDE UP.'"
"THE CONTRACTOR ANSWERED, AAW I GOT SOME POLACKS OUT THERE
LAYIN SOD, AND I GOT TO KEEP REMINDING THEM."
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
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ETHNIC JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
THERE WAS AN AMERICAN, A GERMAN, AND A POLAK WHO WERE RUNNING
AWAY FROM NATIVES IN A JUNGLE IN AFRICA. TO ESCAPE THEY DECIDED
THAT THEY COULD CLIMB A TREE AND MAKE ANIMAL SOUNDS.
THE AMERICAN WENT UP THE TREE AND MADE A SOUND LIKE A MONKEY.
THE NATIVES PASSED HIM BY. THE GERMAN WENT UP A TREE AND MADE
A SOUND LIKE A BIRD. THE NATIVES PASSED HIM BY. THE POLACK
WENT UP A TREE AND MADE A SOUND OF AN ANIMAL- "MOO".
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; WARREN
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
THERE WERE THESE THREE POLOCKS WHO WANTED TO MEASURE A FLAGPOLE.
FIRST, TWO TRIED TO CLIMB THE POLE WITH A TAPE MEASURE BUT ONLY MADE
IT THREE QUARTERS OF THE WAY UP BEFORE THEY SLID DOWN. A MAN CAME
UP TO THEM AND ASKED WHAT THEY WERE DOING. ONE POLOCK SAID, "WE
WANT TO MEASURE HOW TALL THE FLAGPOLE IS." THE MAN SAID, "WHY
DON'T YOU LAY IT DOWN?" ONE OF THE POLOCKS SAID " OH NO, WE DON'T
WANT TO MEASURE HOW LONG IT IS, WE WANT TO MEASURE HOW TALL IT IS."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; TAYLOR
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977 ; 00-00-1970
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
THERE WERE FOUR AMERICANS AND ONE POLOCK IN AN AIRPLANE. THE PLANE
STARTED TO CRASH BUT THERE WERE ONLY FOUR PARACHUTES. THREE
AMERICANS JUMPED OUT WITH A PARACHUTE EACH. ONE AMERICAN AND ONE
POLOCK WERE LEFT WITH ONE PARACHUTE. THE AMERICAN SAID, "I'LL JUMP
DOWN WITH THE PARACHUTE AND WHEN I LAND I'LL SHINE A FLASHLIGHT UP
TO YOU AND YOU CAN CLIMB DOWN THE BEAM." THE POLOCK SAID, "HOW
DUMB DO YOU THINK I AM? I KNOW THAT WHEN I GET HALFWAY DOWN, YOU
ARE GONNA TURN OFF THE LIGHT."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; TAYLOR
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977 ; 00-00-1972
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
HOW MANY POLOCKS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? 52: ONE TO
HOLD THE LADDER, ONE TO HOLD THE LIGHT BULB AND 50 TO TURN THE HOUSE
AROUND.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; TAYLOR
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman BELIEF -- Poli RIDDLE -- Riddle Question |
Date learned: 11-00-1977 ; 00-00-1970
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ETHNIC JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
THERE WAS AN ITALIAN, AN AMERICAN AND A POLOCK IN THE DESERT. THE
ITALIAN WAS CARRYING A BOTTLE OF WINE, THE AMERICAN A LOAF OF BREAD,
AND THE POLOCK WAS CARRYING A CAR DOOR. WHILE THEY WERE WALKING,
THEY BECAME HUNGRY AND THIRSTY, SO THEY SAT DOWN AND THE ITALIAN
OPENED HIS BOTTLE OF WINE AND SPLIT IT THREE WAYS. THE AMERICAN
TOOK OUT HIS LOAF OF BREAD AND SPLIT IT THREE WAYS. THE ITALIAN AND
THE AMERICAN LOOKED AT THE POLOCK AND ASKED WHY HE WAS CARRYING A
CAR DOOR. THE POLOCK SAID, "IN CASE IT GETS HOT, I CAN ROLL DOWN
THE WINDOW."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; TAYLOR
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977 ; 00-00-1971
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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
A POLISH KNOCK-KNOCK JOKE, YOU START IT.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 12-00-1977
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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE POLISH GUY WHO BROKE HIS LEG WHILE RAKING
LEAVES? HE FELL OUT OF THE TREE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 12-00-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
THIS POLACK WAS SO SLOW HE WENT TO THE ZOO TO WATCH THE TURTLES
WHIZ BY.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; GROSSE POINTE ; BON SECOURS HOSPITAL
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
WHAT'S A POLISH INTELLECTUAL?
A MAN WHO DOES NOT MOVE HIS LIPS WHILE READING.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; GROSSE POINTE
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-19-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO KEEP A POLACK FROM SMELLING?
CUT OFF HIS NOSE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 00001970S
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
WHY DOES A POLACK EAT BEANS FOR DINNER ON SATURDAY NIGHT?
SO HE CAN TAKE A BUBBLE BATH SUNDAY MORNING.
Submitter comment:
FLATULENCE
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Plant BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977
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POLISH AMERICAN JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
WHAT DO THE NUMBERS 1776 AND 1492 HAVE IN COMMON?
THEY ARE THE ADJOINING ROOMS AT THE WARSAW HILTON.
BUT WHO OWNS THE HOTEL?
THE AMERICANS.
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
HOW DO POLISH DOGS GET SNUBBED NOSES?
FROM CHASING PARKED CARS.
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
WE ALL KNOW WHO DISCOVERED AMERICA, BUT WHO DISCOVERED POLAND?
THE ROTO ROOTER MAN.
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
TO MAKE A POLISH COCKTAIL YOU DROP A MUSHROOM INTO A GLASS OF BEER.
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE POLISH AIRPLANE THAT CRASHED?
IT RAN OUT OF COAL.
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
WHAT IS THE TOUGHEST JOB IN HAMTRAMCK, MICHIGAN?
RIDING SHOTGUN ON THE GARBAGE TRUCKS.
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977
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POLISH JOKE
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
THEY PUT AN INDIAN ON A NICKEL. NOW THEY ARE GOING TO PUT A
POLACK ON A SLUG.
Submitter comment:
COIN
Where learned: THROUGH LETTERS ; TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Poli |
Date learned: 11-00-1977