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TERROR TALE
I REMEMBER IN THE SUMMER OF 1964, I WAS AN ACTIVE SIX YEAR OLD.
MY FRIENDS AND I WOULD GO TO THE HILL AT THE SOUTHFIELD CIVIC
CENTER AND RUN UP AND DOWN IT FOR FUN AND EXCITEMENT. THE
GARDENER OVER THERE TOLD US ABOUT HOOP SNAKES. HE SAID THEY WERE
SNAKES ROLLED UP LIKE HOULA HOOPS AND THEY ROLL DOWN HILLS.
HE TOLD US TO RUN ZIG ZAG SO AS NOT TO GET CAUGHT BY THE LITTLE
CREATURES.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; SOUTHFIELD ; 22289 WOODWILL
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale BELIEF -- Animal |
Date learned: 00-00-1964
LEGEND
AT MICHIGAN STATE UNIVERSITY THERE IS A RIVER NAMED
THE RED CEDAR, WHICH FLOWS THROUGH THE ENTIRE CAMPUS.
THIS IS THE ONLY RIVER IN EXISTENCE THAT HAS A RUBBER
COATED BOTTOM, IMPLYING A FAVORITE PLACE FOR LATE HOUR DATES.
Submitter comment: FROM DORM FRIENDS
Data entry tech comment: COLLECTOR'S SPELLING CORRECTED BY KEYPUNCHER.
Where learned: DORM ; MICHIGAN STATE
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale BELIEF -- Running water Large current. |
Date learned: 11-07-1967
JEST ANECDOTE
I ONCE KNEW A MAN SO OLD HE WAS OLDER THAN HIS MOTHER.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): HYPERBOLE
| Subject headings: | Favorites PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale SPEECH -- Formula PROVERB -- Proverbial Comparison |
Date learned: DATE NOT RECORDED BY COLLECTOR.
THE CRACKER BOX
IT SEEMS THAT THERE WERE TWO ANTS OUT FOR A WALK ONE DAY
AND THEY FOUND THEMSELVES IN A KITCHEN. ALL OF A SUDDEN,
ONE ANT STARTED RUNNING VERY FAST ACROSS A BOX OF
SALTINE CRACKERS. THE OTHER RAN AS FAST AS HE COULD
AND CAUGHT HIS FRIEND. "WHY ARE YOU GOING SO FAST
ACROSS THE BOX?" HE WANTED TO KNOW. "DIDN'T YOU SEE
WHAT IT SAID BACK THERE?" "NO." "IT SAID 'TEAR
ACROSS DOTTED LINE.'"
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT HEARD IT AT HER SCHOOL, BUT DOESN'T KNOW
FROM WHOM.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 10-13-1967
THERE WERE TWO STATUES IN THE PARK. THEY WERE BOTH NUDE
GRECIAN STATUES, ONE MALE, THE OTHER FEMALE. ONE DAY A
FAIRY GODMOTHER CAME UP TO THEM AND ASKED THEM IF THEY
WOULD LIKE TO MAKE A WISH. THEY SAID THAT THEY WOULD
LIKE TO BE TURNED INTO HUMAN PEOPLE. SHE WAVED HER MAGIC
STICK AND THEY WERE SUDDENLY ALIVE. THEY RAN INTO THE
WOODS TOGETHER. ABOUT A HALF HOUR LATER THEY WERE STILL
IN THE WOODS AND THE GODMOTHER WAS GETTING WORRIED, SO
SHE WENT IN TO SEE WHAT WAS HAPPENING. SHE HEARD SOME
TALKING BEHIND SOME BUSHES, SO SHE SNUCK UP TO SEE WHAT
WAS GOING ON. SHE HEARD THEM SAYING, "NOW IT'S YOUR
TURN, YOU HOLD THE PIGEON WHILE I SHIT ON IT."
Submitter comment: INFORMANT HEARD IT FROM HER PARENTS ABOUT A YEAR AGO.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 12-00-1965
MR. MURPHY WAS WARNED NEVER TO GO ADVENTURING IN THE WILD
TOWN OF HURLEY, WISCONSIN., WHEN HE WAS A TEENAGER. MANY
STORIES WENT AROUND, NONE OF WHICH HE CAN REMEMBER
EXPLICITLY, BUT HE DOES REMEMBER MANY TIMES HEARING
OF THE LUMBERJACKS THAT WENT THERE, GOT DRUNK, WENT
TO A "CAT HOUSE" AND WOKE UP THE NEXT MORNING IN THE
MIDDLE OF THE STREET, BROKE AND HALF FROZEN. HE ALSO
HEARD MANY TALES OF MEN WHO HAD GOTTEN INTO FIGHTS
AND BEEN KILLED AND WHOSE BODIES WEREN'T FOUND UNTIL THE
SPRING THAW, BECAUSE THEY HAD JUST BEEN TAKEN OUT AND
DUMPED IN THE DEEP SNOW.
Where learned: DETROIT ; MICHIGAN, ASSUMED
James Callow Keyword(s): HOUSE OF ILL REPUTE ; PROSTITUTION
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 05-22-1965
TALL TALE
WHEN I WAS A LOGGER WE HAD THIS ONE FELLA IN OUR CAMP,
ALWAYS BRAGGING ABOUT WHAT A GREAT HUNTER HE WAS. THIS
ONE DAY, HE WENT OUT HUNTING AND BEFORE HE COULD FIRE
A SHOT, HE SAW A BIG, BLACK BEAR. HE DECIDED HE'D KILL
THAT BEAR AND THEN GET US ALL TO HELP HIM SKIN IT.
WELL, HE SHOT, BUT DIDN'T KILL THE BEAR, ONLY WOUNDED IT.
AND THAT BEAR STARTED CHASING HIM. WELL, I'LL TELL YOU,
HE WAS MIGHTY SCARED. HE RAN AS FAST AS HE COULD, BUT
THAT BEAR WAS SO CLOSE HE COULD FEEL HIS BREATH DOWN
HIS BACK. SO, WHAT DID HE DO, HE TOOK OFF HIS JACKET
AND PUT IT OVER A TREE BRANCH SO THE BEAR WOULD THINK
IT WAS HIM, AND THEN HE TOOK OFF IN ANOTHER DIRECTION.
WELL, WHEN HE TURNED TO LOOK BACK, THAT BEAR WAS HUGGING
HIS JACKET AND SQUEEZING IT JUST AS HARD AS HE COULD.
WELL, WHEN HE GOT BACK TO CAMP, YOU'D THINK HE'D HAVE
LEARNED NOT TO BRAG SO MUCH, BUT WHAT DID HE DO? HE
BOASTED ABOUT HE'D TRICKED THAT OLD BEAR!
Submitter comment: HEARD IN GAYLORD, MICHIGAN ABOUT 1930.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; Gaylord
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 10-00-1963
I AM A MEMBER OF THE S.B.E.B.S.Q.S.A.,INC., A BARBERSHOP
QUARTET SOCIETY. THE INFORMANT TOLD THIS STORY TO A
GROUP OF BARBERSHOPPERS.
IT SEEMS THAT ONE OF OUR MEMBERS HAD BEEN DEVOTING MUCH
OF HIS TIME TO THE SOCIETY. IN FACT, HIS LIFE REVOLVED
AROUND ALL THE FUNCTIONS THAT OUR SOCIETY PERFORMS. HE
BELONGED TO A REGISTERED QUARTET, DIRECTED A CHORUS, WAS
THE LOCAL PRESIDENT AND PROGRAM CHAIRMAN.
ONE NIGHT, HE WAS OUT ESPECIALLY LATE WORKING ON A NEW
ARRANGEMENT. HE LEFT THE PRACTICE HALL AND ON THE WAY
TO HIS CAR, HE WAS ACCOSTED BY THREE MEN. THEY BEAT
HIM VICIOUSLY, KICKING HIM TIME AND TIME AGAIN. AFTER
HE WAS UNCONSCIOUS, THEY ROBBED HIM OF FIFTY DOLLARS.
HE WOKE UP ABOUT AN HOUR LATER, BLOODY, DISORIENTED, AND
SORE. HE MANAGED TO REACH INTO HIS POCKET AND PULLED
OUT HIS PITCHPIPE AND BLEW A "B FLAT" AND YELLED "HELP."
(RIGHT ON KEY).
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DEARBORN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 02-20-1967
THIS FELLOW WENT INTO A RESTAURANT AND ORDERED A BOWL OF
CHILI. HE WAS VISIBLY DISTURBED WHEN THE WAITRESS SERVED
HIS CHILI, BECAUSE SHE HAD HER THUMB BURIED IN THE BOWL
OF FLUID. NOT BEING THE KIND TO CREATE A FUSS, HE PUSHED
THE BOWL AWAY AND ORDERED A CUP OF COFFEE. THIS WAITRESS
RETURNED, BUT ALAS! HER THUMB WAS ALMOST COMPLETELY
IMMERSED IN THE COFFEE. THE CUSTOMER COULDN'T IGNORE
THAT A SECOND TIME AND DISGUSTINGLY ASKED THE MEANING OF
THIS. THE WAITRESS REPLIED THAT SHE HAD CAUGHT HER
THUMB IN A GRINDER A FEW DAYS EARLIER AND IT BECAME
INFECTED AND FULL OF PUSS. SHE THEN SHOWED HIM THE
THUMB WHICH WAS MANGLED, FESTERED, AND RUNNING. SHE
SAID THAT SHE HAD GONE TO HER DOCTOR AND HE SUGGESTED
THAT SHE KEEP THE THUMB IN SOMETHING WET AND WARM.
THE CUSTOMER AROSE AND SAID, "WHY DON'T YOU SHOVE IT UP
YOUR ASS?"
SHE REPLIED, "I DO WHEN I GO TO THE KITCHEN."
Submitter comment:
THE INFORMANT, A CITY POLICEMAN, TOLD THIS STORY AFTER
A DINNER. THE STORY, ONE OF MANY DESIGNED TO CREATE
SOME UNEASINESS IN THE STOMACHS OF THE WOMEN PRESENT, WAS
ONE WHICH I HAD HEARD SEVERAL YEARS EARLIER, BUT TO THE
INFORMANT IT WAS FRESH AND NEW.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 03-10-1967
IT SEEMS THAT THREE BUMS WERE SITTING ON THE BANK OF A
RIVER ON A PARTICULARLY COLD, BLUSTRY DAY. THEY WERE
INADEQUATELY DRESSED FOR THE OCCASION; FURTHERMORE,
THEY WERE STARVING. THE RIVER BEFORE THEM WAS NOT
COMPLETELY FROZEN OVER AND IT HAPPENED THAT A DEAD,
BLOATED DOG JUST WAS WASHED UP TO SHORE. TRAMP NO. 1
THOUGHT IT AN ACT OF DIVINE PROVIDENCE AND SUGGESTED THAT
THEY SOMEHOW CUT THE FROZEN, BLOATED DOG INTO THREE PARTS
AND HAVE A FEAST. TRAMP NO. 2 AGREED AND BEGAN TO DISECT
THE UNFORTUNATE ANIMAL. TRAMP NO. 3 HOWEVER, BEGGED OFF.
SAYING HE WOULD RATHER STARVE THAN EAT THE BLOATED, CRUDDY
REMAINS OF THE MISERABLE DOG. SO THE OTHER TWO TRAMPS
CUT THE HOUND IN TWO, AND GORGED THEMSELVES ON THE COLD
DOG MEAT. AFTER THEY HAD COMPLETED THEIR BANQUET, IT WAS
ONLY A MATTER OF TIME UNTIL THEY BOTH THREW UP
(REGURGITATED). WHEREUPON TRAMP NO. 3 SHOUTED WITH GLEE
"THAT'S WHAT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR, A WARM MEAL!"
Submitter comment:
AFTER DINNER, AT A PARTY, THE INFORMANT TOLD THIS STORY
WHICH AMONG OTHERS WAS INTENDED TO TEASE THE DIGESTIVE
CONSTITUTIONS OF THE LISTENERS. IN OTHER WORDS, WE
WERE TALKING ABOUT STORIES WHICH WERE AIMED AT GETTING
SOMEBODY SICK.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 03-10-1967
JESS HARPER, FROM GODRICH ONTARIO CAME INTO LONDON,
LOOKING FOR A JOB WITH THE RAILROAD. HE WAS 6'6"
TALL AND WEIGHED 240 POUNDS. HE HAD NO TROUBLE PASSING
THE PHYSICAL, BUT WHEN IT CAME TO THE MENTAL PART, HE
LEFT SOMETHING TO BE DESIRED. THE SHARP LAWYER BEHIND
THE DESK IMMEDIATELY BEGAN DRILLING TRICKLY QUESTIONS
AT JESS. "LET'S SAY THAT THERE ARE TWO TRAINS ON THE
TRACK AT THE SAME TIME, AND EACH TRAIN IS GOING 100
MILES PER HOUR. WITH 200 PEOPLE ON EACH TRAIN. WHAT
WOULD YOU DO, JESS?" "WELL," JESS SAID, "I GUESS I'D WAVE
MY HANDERCHIEF." "NO! NO!, THEY COULDN'T SEE IT IN THE
DARK," SAID THE LAWYER. "THEN I'D WAVE MY LANTERN,"
JESS SAID. "NO! NO!, THEY COULDN'T SEE THE LANTERN
EITHER." "WELL, I GUESS I'D WHISTLE AS LOUD AS I COULD."
"NO! NO! YOU COULDN'T HEAR IT ABOVE THE NOISE." "OH!
I KNOW WHAT I'D DO," JESS SAID, "I'D GO CALL MY SISTER
NELLY WHO LIVES ABOVE THE TRACKS." "CALL YOUR SISTER,
NELLY? WHY?" "WELL," JESS SAID, "I'D TELL HER TO COME
DOWN AND SEE THE GODAMNEST WRECK SHE'S EVER SEEN IN
HER LIFE!"
Submitter comment:
WALLY SAID HIS DAD HAS BEEN TELLING THIS STORY EVER
SINCE HE CAN REMEMBER.
Where learned: CANADA ; ONTARIO ; TOP HAT SUPPER CLUB ; WINDSOR
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
COMMITTMENT
A PIG AND A CHICKEN WERE WALKING DOWN A COUNTRY ROAD
DISCUSSING CHURCH SUPPORT. THEY CAME UPON A ROAD
SIGN WHICH READ, "RESTAURANT--SPECIAL FOR
BREAKFAST--HAM AND EGGS."
WELL, THE CHICKEN SAID, "SUPPOSE WE GO IN FOR
BREAKFAST AND CONTINUE OUR DISCUSSION."
"NO," SHOUTED THE PIG, "NOT ON YOUR LIFE. FOR
YOU IT WOULD BE JUST A CONTRIBUTION. FOR ME--
TOTAL COMMITMENT."
Submitter comment:
ED SAID THAT HE HEARD IT FROM A CLASSMATE AT
GEORGETOWN PREPATORY HIGH SCHOOL, NEAR WASHINGTON,
D. C. DURING THE MONTH OF AUGUST.
Where learned: WASHINGTON DC
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 09-12-1967
MEDICINE SHOWS USED TO COME TO TOWN QUITE REGULARLY.
ONE HE PARTICULARLY REMEMBERS, FEATURED A CURE FOR
TAPEWORM, ALONG WITH ITS OTHER MAGICAL PROPERTIES.
THE MEDICINE MAN HAD A TAPEWORM ON DISPLAY IN A
BOTTLE AND HE TOLD THE PEOPLE THAT, IN ORDER TO GET
THIS PARTICULAR TAPEWORM OUT OF A MAN, SO THEY COULD
USE IT FOR DISPLAY, THEY STARVED THE MAN FOR THREE
DAYS AND THEN PUT A GLASS OF MILK IN FRONT OF HIS
MOUTH. THE TAPE WORM CAME RIGHT UP OUT OF THE MAN'S
STOMACH AND JUMPED INTO THE GLASS.
Where learned: DETROIT ; MICHIGAN, ASSUMED
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Outlaw Criminal Bandit Pirate PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale BELIEF -- Curer BELIEF -- Method of Curing |
Date learned: 05-11-1965
TALL TALE
IT WAS FESTIVAL TIME IN A SMALL VILLAGE IN PANAMA WHERE THERE WAS
DANCING AROUND THE FIRE UNTIL THE SMALL HOURS OF THE MORNING.
WHEN EACH FAMILY STARTED HOME IT WAS FOUND THAT ONE GIRL AND ONE BOY
WERE MISSING FROM THE VILLAGE. A SEARCH WAS COMMENCED AND THE MEN
OF THE VILLAGE BEGAN SETTING OUT FOR THE JUNGLES WHEN ALL OF A
SUDDEN A BOA WITH ITS BODY SWOLLEN APPEARED IN THE VILLAGE SQUARE.
THE FATHER OF THE GIRL, THINKING THE BOA HAD EATEN HIS DAUGHTER
SLICED OFF THE HEAD OF THE SNAKE WITH HIS MACHETE. JUST AT THAT
MOMENT THE TWO CHILDREN APPEARED MYSTERIOUSLY IN THE CROWD OF MEN.
Data entry tech comment:
Updated by TRD
Where learned: PANAMA AIR FORCE BASE
Keyword(s): Fable ; FESTIVAL ; Jungle ; Snake ; TALL TALE
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 00-00-1976
HOW THE GREAT LAKES WERE FORMED
JOHN BUNYAN, PAUL BUNYAN'S BROTHER, DECIDED ONE DAY TO BUILD A
LONG, LONG LADDER TO REACH UP TO HEAVEN. HE BUILT THE LADDER
OUT OF FIR TREES AND USED THE BRANCHES FOR RUNGS. HE STARTED
CLIMBING ONE DAY, AND HE CLIMBED AND CLIMBED AND CLIMBED. THEN
HE GOT SO DIZZY FAR ABOVE THE GROUND THAT HE FELL. JOHN BUNYAN
BOUNCED IN FIVE PLACES, MAKING FIVE DEEP HOLES IN THE EARTH.
AFTER THE GLACIAL AGE THE WATER FILLED IN THE HOLES AND FORMED THE
GREAT LAKES. AS THE LADDER FELL, IT ENDED UP IN A STRAIGHT LINE,
AND BECAME THE TRACKS OF THE TRANSCONTINENTAL RAILROAD.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | Favorites PROSE NARRATIVE -- Still water Large body. Ocean, sea.... PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 02-26-1982
IN HORSE AND BUGGY DAYS BEFORE THERE WERE CHAINS PEOPLE USED
COWHIDE TO HARNESS THEIR WAGONS TO HORSES. MY GRANDFATHER WAS
RETURNING HOME FROM A TRIP AND HAD TO CROSS A CREEK. THE
WAGON GOT STUCK IN THE SAND SO GRANDFATHER TOOK THE HORSES AND
STRETCHED THE COWHIDE ATTACHED THE WAGON AND TIED IT TO A POST
AT THE BARN. THE NEXT MORNING THE SUN WAS SHINING ON THE
WINDOW AND HE LOOKED OUT TO SEE THE WAGON IN FRONT OF THE
BARN. THE SUN SHRANK THE COWHIDE PULLING THE WAGON OUT.
Submitter comment: TALL TALE
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI ; NATCHEZ
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
THE GREAT SMELLING GUN
MY UNCLE BRAGGED THAT HE COULD KILL MORE GEESE WITH THE
SMELLING GUN. HE WOULD HEAR THE SOUND OF THE GEESE IN THE SKY
AND SHOOT. THEN HE WENT BACK IN THE HOUSE AND WATCHED THE
GEESE FALL OUT OF THE SKY.
Submitter comment: TALL TALE, BRAGGING TO CHILDREN
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI ; NATCHEZ
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
JOKE
"WHAT SUPERB GRAPEFRUIT!" EXCLAIMED A VISITOR TO TEXAS AS
HE PASSED A CITRUS GROVE. "OH, OUR LEMONS ARE A LITTLE
SMALL NOW," SAID THE TEXAN NONCHALANTLY. "WE'VE HAD A
BAD SEASON, YOU KNOW." A LITTLE FARTHER DOWN THE ROAD
THE VISITOR REMARKED ON THE SIZE AND COLOR OF SOME
FLOWERS. "JUST SOME LITTLE OL' WEEDS, " THE TEXAN SAID
MODESTLY. FINALLY THEY CAME TO THE RIO GRANDE. "HMM-M"
MURMURED THE VISITOR, "SOMEONE'S RADIATOR MUST BE
LEAKING!"
Where learned: ILLINOIS ; CHICAGO
James Callow Keyword(s): SIZE
| Subject headings: | Favorites PROSE NARRATIVE -- Tale PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 04-00-1990
Michelle's grandpa used to tell her mom when she couldn't fall
asleep as a young child that her stuffed animals got very
angry because at the stroke of midnight they came out to play.
In the morning, the animals were spread out all over the floor
so the child believed the story.
Submitter comment:
Michelle said her mom used to use the same one on her and she
believed it and fell asleep.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): Stuffed animals
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale BELIEF -- Measure of time WeekDayHour |
Have you heard about the man who swam halfway across
the ocean, then he decided that he couldn't make it
so he swam back?
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): strong man
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote PROSE NARRATIVE -- Lie Tall tale |
Date learned: 00001980S