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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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TRUE FRIENDS ARE LIKE DIAMONDS--
PRECIOUS AND RARE.
FALSE ONES ARE LIKE LEAVES--
FOUND EVERYWHERE.

Submitter comment: THIS USED TO BE ONE OF MY PEN PALS (1957). THIS WAS
ONE OF HER CLEVER SAYINGS.

Data entry tech comment: OFTEN FOUND IN AUTOGRAPH BOOKS.

Where learned: Wyoming ; ROCK SPRINGS

Keyword(s): FRIENDSHIP JEWELS ; METER: TROCHAIC ; QUATRAIN FUNCTION AUTOGRAPH VERSE ; RHYME: MASCULINE, ABCB

James Callow Keyword(s): AUTUMN LEAVES SCATTERED EVERYWHERE--AMA BARR

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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VERSE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

LISTEN, LISTEN, THE CAT'S PISSING.
WHERE? WHERE?
UNDER THE CHAIR.
RUN, RUN, GET YOUR GUN.
AWH SHIT, SHE'S ALL DONE.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT ; RESIDENCE HALLS

James Callow Keyword(s): SCATALOGICAL SLANG

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse
Filter - Mature Content

Date learned: 00001950S AND 00001960S

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RIDDLE QUESTION

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

AB C D GOLDFISH
BN NO GOLDFISH
O S A R AB
C M P N

Submitter comment:

THIS CAN BE TRANSLATED TO:
AB SEE THE GOLDFISH
BN, THERE IS NO GOLDFISH
OH YES THERE IS AB
SEE THEM PEEING

James Callow comment:

VARIATION: MNO GOLDFISH
CN[ HARTWIG, WILLIAM 720390
C1[ 260 ALAMEDA
C2[ YOUNGSTOWN, OHIO 44504
DNC[ 1,688
******************** C FILE 1 ********************

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT ; CAMPUS

James Callow Keyword(s): SCATALOGICAL URINATION

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 00001950S AND 00001960S

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SHIT DRINKING GAME

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

EVERYBODY IS A TYPE OF ANIMAL SHIT, WHICH IS DETERMINED BEFORE THE
GAME. EVERYONE KNOWS WHO IS WHAT ANIMAL. SOMEONE STARTS BY SAYING
"SOMEBODY SHIT ON THE FLOOR, I THINK IT WAS...SAYING ANIMAL'S SHIT."
THE PERSON WHO IS THAT ANIMAL SAYS "BULLSHIT", THE FIRST PERSON SAYS,
"THEN WHO SHIT?" THE SECOND PERSON SAYS "I THINK IT WAS..THEN HE SAYS
ANOTHER ANIMAL'S SHIT." THE GAME CONTINUES LIKE THIS. ANY ERROR OR
DELAY IN ANSWERING CAUSES THAT PERSON TO DRINK.

Where learned: DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): SCATOLOGICAL

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Memory
Filter - Mature Content

Date learned: 11-24-1973

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VERSE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

BEANS, BEANS, THE MUSICAL FRUIT, THE MORE YOU EAT THE MORE YOU TOOT,
THE MORE YOU TOOT, THE BETTER YOU FEEL, SO EAT BEANS AT EVERY MEAL.

Where learned: DETROIT ; TOLD IN

James Callow Keyword(s): EUPHEMISM: TOOT FOR FART ; RHYME: AABB ; SCATALOGICAL

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse

Date learned: 09-20-1972

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VERSE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY STARTED
WHEN UNCLE FESTER FARTED.
THAT'S WHY THEY'RE RETARDED,
THE AADDAMS FAMILY.
RE RETARDED, THE ADDAMS FAMILY.

Submitter comment:

THIS IS A PARODY OF THE THEME SONG OF A TV PROGRAM THAT WAS POPULAR
SOME YEARS AGO.

Where learned: DETROIT ; TOLD IN

James Callow Keyword(s): SCATALOGICAL

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ill humor Ridicule Mockery

Date learned: 09-20-72

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VERSE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

THE NIGHT WAS DARK, THE SKY WAS BLUE, AROUND THE CORNER A WAGON FLEW.
A SHOT WAS FIRED, A SCREAM WAS HEARD, AND A MAN WAS HIT BY A FLYING TURD.

Submitter comment:

THIS VERSE IS CURRENTLY GOING AROUND CLARK ELEMENTARY SCHOOL.

Where learned: DETROIT ; TOLD IN

James Callow Keyword(s): RHYME: AABB ; SCATALOGICAL

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse
Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Art Craft Architecture Art, Craft, Architecture

Date learned: 09-20-72

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PRANKS - PENNSYLVANNIA

PUSH OUTHOUSES FOR HALLOWEEN PRANK.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): SCATOLOGICAL

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- October 31 Halloween
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Entertainment Diversion

Date learned: 11-30-1972

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JOKE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

QUESTION: WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN SWALLOWED BY AN ELEPHANT?
ANSWER: YOU RUN AROUND TIL YOU GET POOPED OUT.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ROSEVILLE

James Callow Keyword(s): SCATOLOGICAL BOWEL MOVEMENT

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 11-30-1972

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MORAL PROVERB

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

THE DOG CARRIED IT AWAY ON ITS TAIL.

Submitter comment:

TRANSLATED FROM LITHUANIAN.

Data entry tech comment:

5X8 CARD CONTAINS LITHUANIAN ORIGINAL OF TITLE.

Keyword(s): ANIMAL ; SCATALOGICAL (?)

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

Date learned: 02-17-1971

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PROVERB

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

A DOG NEVER BARKS WHEN IT SHITS.

Submitter comment:

IN OUR FAMILY WHICH WAS UNUSUALLY LARGE IT WAS SOMETIMES DIFFICULT
TO MAINTAIN SILENCE AT THE DINNER TABLE. MY POLISH GRANDMOTHER WAS
SUCCESSFUL WITH A PHRASE I DID NOT EVEN UNDERSTAND. YEARS LATER MY
MOTHER TRANSLATED FOR ME.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): ANIMAL ; FUNCTION ; SCATALOGICAL

James Callow Keyword(s): ADVICE: NEGATIVE ; DEFECATION ; FUNCTION ; OBSERVATION ; OBSERVATION ; OBSERVATION ; OBSERVATION

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Mammal
PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

Date learned: 00-00-1940

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POLISH PROVERB

DON'T STIR IT AND IT WON'T STICK.

Submitter comment: SHE LEARNED IT FROM HER FATHER.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): SCATAL (?)OGICAL

James Callow Keyword(s): ADVICE: NEGATIVE ; PARADOX?

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

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ANGER

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

BETTER TO BE PISSED OFF THAN BE PISSED ON.

Submitter comment:

TOLD TO INFORMANT BY JOHN JOGAN.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): SCATALOGICAL

James Callow Keyword(s): ANGER AND MISTREATMENT ; CONTRAST ; PARALLELISM ; URINE

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim

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PROVERB

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

CONFUCIUS SAY: LADY WHO SWALLOW FLOOR-POLISH HAVE FINE FINISH.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): SCATALOGICAL

James Callow Keyword(s): PARODY ; PUN

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

Date learned: 00-00-1967

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WELLERISM

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

"EVERY LITTLE BIT HELPS," SAID THE OLD LADY AS SHE URINATED INTO
THE OCEAN.

Data entry tech comment:

GOOD GRIEF

Where learned: ONTARIO

Keyword(s): SCATOLOGICAL

James Callow Keyword(s): IRONY ; PARODY

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Wellerism Quotation

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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PROVERBIAL METAPHOR

NEVER SOIL YOUR OWN NEST

Submitter comment: FROM UNCERTAIN

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; GROSSE POINTE

Keyword(s): SCATOLOGICAL

James Callow Keyword(s): ADVICE: NEGATIVE ; CLEANLINESS ; DEFICATION

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Number Emptiness, nothingness, zero
PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

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SPEED

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

HE CAME OUT OF THERE, LIKE SHIT THROUGH A FUNNEL.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): SCATOLOGICAL

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Phrase
PROVERB -- Proverbial Comparison

Date learned: 00-00-1969

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VERSE

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

GENE, GENE MADE A MACHINE
JOE, JOE MADE IT GO
ART, ART LET A FART
BLEW THE ENGINE ALL APART.

Where learned: HOME

Keyword(s): CHAIN ; INTERNAL RHYME ; ITERATION ; PERSONAL NAMES ; RHYME:ABCC ; SCATOLOGICAL

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse

Date learned: 11-29-1969

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A POEM TO ME MUDDER

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

WHEN MY PRAYERS WERE POORLY SAID
WHO TUCKED ME IN MY WIDDLE BED?
AND SPANKED ME TILL ME ASS WAS RED,
ME MUDDER.
WHO TOOK ME FROM MY COZY COT,
WHO PUT ME ON THE ICE COLD POT,
AND MADE ME PEE IF I COULD NOT?
ME MUDDER.
AND WHEN THE MORNING LIGHT WOULD COME,
AND IN ME CRIB ME DRIBBLE SOME,
WHO WIPED ME TIDY WIDDLE BUM?
ME MUDDER.
WHO WOULD ME HAIR SO NEATLY PART,
AND HUG ME GENTLY TO HER HEART,
SOMETIMES SQUEEZE ME TILL ME FART?
ME MUDDER.
WHO LOOKED AT ME WITH EYEBROW KNIT,
NEARLY HAD A KING SIZE FIT,
WHEN IN ME SUNDAY PANTS ME SHIT?
ME MUDDER.
WHEN AT NIGHT THE BED WOULD SQUEEK,
ME RAISED ME HEAD TO HAVE A PEEK,
WHO YELLED AT ME TO GO TO SLEEP?
ME FADDER.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ROYAL OAK

James Callow Keyword(s): BABY TALK ; SCATOLOGY ; SLANG

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest
Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Custom Festival C840.533

Date learned: CA00001977

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Entry filtered.

GRAFFITI

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

YELLOW RIVER BY I PEE DAILY.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ROYAL OAK

James Callow Keyword(s): PUN ; SCATOLOGICAL BOOK TITLE ; SLANG FOR URINATION

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Art Craft Architecture Art, Craft, Architecture

Date learned: CA00001977

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