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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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ASHES TO ASHES, DUST TO DUST,
IF THE DEVIL DON'T GET YOU, "SING, SING" MUST.

Where learned: PENNSYLVANIA ; GLENSHAW

James Callow Keyword(s): PRISON AT OSSINING, NEW YORK

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Autograph Verse Wisecracks, gags, silly stories, insults

Date learned: 00001929-1933

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WHOEVER STEALS THIS BOOK OF KNOWLEDGE,
WILL GRADUATE FROM SING SING COLLEGE.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): PRISON IN OSSINING, NEW YORK

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Wisecracks, Gags, Silly Insults

Date learned: 00-00-1955

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NEW YEARS'S CUSTOM

ON NEW YEAR'S A BUNCH OF KIDS KNOCKED ON THE DOOR SHOUTING LET THE
NEW YEAR IN. RUN AROUND THE TABLE THREE TIMES SHOUTING LET THE NEW
YEAR IN AND GET MONEY ON WAY OUT - GO TO THE NEXT HOUSE.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT ; TOLD IN

James Callow Keyword(s): VISITING AND GIFT-GIVING ON NEW YEAR'S.

Subject headings: 686 Properties attributed to specific numbers or numerals individually.
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- January 1 New Year's

Date learned: 11-30-1972

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GRANDPA REMEMBERS WHEN HIS MOTHER USED TO CUT PAPER SQUARES,
ABOUT 8 INCHES BY 8 INCHES EXACT. THIS WAS AFTER THE SUNDAY
PAPERS HAD BEEEN READ. AFTER JUDGING THE PILE SHE SAID, "SON
ATTACH THIS PILE TO THE PEG IN THE OUTHOUSE."

Submitter comment: THESE PAPERS WERE USED AS TOILET PAPER.

Where learned: DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): FUNCTIONAL SHIFT: NEWSPAPERS CONVERTED INTO TOILET PAPER

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Home

Date learned: 10-07-1972

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WHEN WE VISITED SOMEONE FOR THE FIRST TIME AT THE FIRST OF THE
YEAR WE HAD TO TAKE THEM SOMETHING. IF THE FAMILY WAS NOT
TAKEN SOMETHING THEY WOULD BE IN NEED FOR THE REST OF THE
YEAR.

Where learned: MICHIGAN

James Callow Keyword(s): GIFT-GIVING AT NEW YEAR'S SEASON

Subject headings: 686 Properties attributed to specific numbers or numerals individually.
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- January 1 New Year's
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Street Trip Relations between relatives, friends, host and guest Social class Rank
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Measure of time Year
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- December 21 solstice to March 20

Date learned: 10-20-1972

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IF YOU HAVE A BABY DON'T CROSS A RUNNING STREAM OF WATER UNTIL
YOUR BABY IS THREE WEEKS OLD. IF YOU DO DROP A STRAIGHT PIN IN
THE WATER.

Where learned: DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): NEWNESS

Subject headings: 686 Properties attributed to specific numbers or numerals individually.
686 Thirds / Thrice / Three / Triple
Favorites
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Birth

Date learned: 09-08-1972

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TRUE RIDDLE

Q: IT IS BLACK AND WHITE AND RED ALL OVER.
A: AN EMBARRASSED ZEBRA.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; RENO HALL LOBBY

Keyword(s): ANIMAL (A) ; LITERAL ; NATURAL PHENOMENON (Q) COLOR

James Callow Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER RIDDLE, VARIAN OF ; SPELLING: RED FOR READ

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- True Riddle

Date learned: 10-01-1968

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PROVERB

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

CONFUCIUS SAY: MAN WHO LOSE KEY TO GIRLFRIENDS PLACE GET NO NEW
KEY.

Where learned: NOT GIVEN

Keyword(s): SEX

James Callow Keyword(s): PARODY ; PUN--NEW KEY (NOOKY) ; SEXUAL INTERCOURSE

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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CUSTOMS

CIGARS: IF YOU ARE EITHER NEWLY PROMOTED OR A NEW FATHER, YOU
DISTRIBUTE CIGARS TO ALL OFFICERS.

Where learned: NOT INCLUDED

Keyword(s): MILITARY ; PROMOTION, NEW FATHER

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Work Commerce Business
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Birth
BELIEF -- Number

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RIDDLE

WHY DID THE MAN THROW HIS PANTS OUT THE WINDOW?
BECAUSE A MAN WAS YELLING, "FREE PRESS"

Where learned: SAINT LEONARD SCHOOL ; DETROIT, ASSUMED

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER NAME ; PUN ON PRESS

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 11-15-1965

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RIDDLE

WHY DID THE MAN THROW HIS PANTS OUT THE WINDOW?
HE HEARD A BOY CALLING FREE PRESS

Where learned: SAINT LEONARD SCHOOL ; DETROIT, ASSUMED

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER NAME

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 09-20-1965

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MORON JOKE

WHY DID THE MORON THROW HIS PANTS OUT OF THE WINDOW?
HE HEARD SOMEONE YELLING, FREE PRESS

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; WARREN

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER NAME ; PUN

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

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NUN'S TALE

IF A GIRL SITS ON A BOY'S LAP, SHE SHOULD PUT A PHONE BOOK BENEATH
HER UNLESS THE GUY IS HER FATHER OR A RELATIVE, IN WHICH CASE A NEWS-
PAPER WILL BE SUFFICIENT, ACCORDING TO THE NUNS.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER SITTING

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Street Trip Relations between relatives, friends, host and guest Social class Rank

Date learned: 02-12-1968

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SUPERSTITION

IF YOU MOVE INTO A BRAND NEW HOUSE, THERE WILL BE A DRASTIC CHANGE
IN THE FAMILY (BIRTH, DEATH, MARRIAGE).

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): OMEN ASSOCIATED WITH NEWNESS.

Subject headings: Observation
BELIEF -- Number

Date learned: 00-00-1963

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SAYING

I'M TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF

Keyword(s): STARTING A NEW CHAPTER IN LIFE BY MENDING MY WAYS

James Callow Keyword(s): RESOLUTION TO BEGIN ANEW

Subject headings: PROVERB -- Proverbial Phrase

Date learned: 00001950'S

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Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

WHY DID THE LITTLE MORON THROW HIS PANTS OUT
THE WINDOW?
BECAUSE HE HEARD SOMEONE YELLING "FREE PRESS."

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman

Date learned: 01-29-1968

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Entry filtered.

Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.

WHY DID THE MORON THROW HIS PANTS OUT THE WINDOW?
HE HEARD A BOY CALLING, "FREE PRESS!"

Submitter comment:

I HEARD THIS JOKE MANY TIMES AS A YOUNGSTER. ODDLY
ENOUGH, I NEVER CAUGHT ON TO IT UNTIL I WAS IN HIGH
SCHOOL.

Where learned: MICHIGAN

James Callow Keyword(s): NEWSPAPER.

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman

Date learned: 00001950S

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AUTOGRAPH ON FRIENDSHIP

IN CENTRAL PARK THERE IS A ROCK
AND ON IT SAYS FORGET-ME-NOT.
AND FARTHER ON THERE IS A TREE
AND ON IT'S CARVED REMEMBER ME.

Submitter comment: INFORMANT NOT AWARE OF NAME OR RESIDENCE OF MESSAGE WRITER.

Data entry tech comment: "ITS" CHANGED TO "IT'S"

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; CAMP METAMORA ; METAMORA

Keyword(s): "INDIRECTION" ; CENTRAL PARK ; CENTRAL PARK, NEW YORK ASSUMED ; COMMENT ON REMEMBRANCE ; INFORMATIVE ; METER: IAMBS ; QUATRAIN ; REMEMBRANCE ; RHYME: AABB ; RHYME: SLANT

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Autograph Verse Remember me

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HOUSEWARMING GIFTS

WHEN A FRIEND GETS A NEW HOUSE, YOU SHOULD TAKE THEM HONEY AND
BREAD ON YOUR FIRST VISIT. DR. SNIDER DOES NOT REMEMBER WHY
THIS IS DONE, BUT HE REMEMBERS THAT IT IS IMPORTANT.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; WEST BLOOMFIELD

Keyword(s): NEW HOME

Subject headings: 686 Properties attributed to specific numbers or numerals individually.
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Street Trip Relations between relatives, friends, host and guest Social class Rank

Date learned: 09-12-1990

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RETORT

WHEN SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU HAVE A MATCH, YOU CHEERILY ANSWER BACK:
"YEAH, DAFFY DUCK AND SPIRO AGNEW." OR "SURE -- ME AND SUPERMAN."

Submitter comment: I OBTAINED THIS ONE WITHOUT EVEN ASKING FOR IT.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; TOLD AT

James Callow Keyword(s): BRAG BOAST ; CARTOON CHARACTER DAFFY DUCK ANIMAL ; VICE-PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: SPIRO AGNEW

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula

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