Offensive content Filter is ON
Your search for B660 returned 470 results.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT A ZEBRA IS?
IT'S ABOUT TWENTY-FIVE SIZES LARGER THAN AN A-BRA.
Submitter comment:
LARRY HEARD IT AT THE TOWN AND GOWN SERIES, FROM A
GROUP CALLED THE ARBORS. (THEATER GROUP)
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; CAR
James Callow Keyword(s): BOSOM ; BREAST ; BUST
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 10-16-1967
ONE TIME, WHEN HE WAS IN THE ARMY, HE REMEMBERS SEEING
A NOTICE THAT "ANYONE WANTING A PASS FOR YOM KIPPUR,
SIGN BELOW." HE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA, SO HE
SIGNED UP. WHEN THE DAY FOR DISTRIBUTING PASSES
ARRIVED, HE STOOD IN LINE WITH THE "SILVERSTEINS AND
THE GOLDBERGS" TO GET HIS PASS. WHEN THE FLIGHT
COMMANDER SAW HIM, HE SAID, "YOU'RE NOT JEWISH."
MORRIS ANSWERED, "NO SIR, BUT YOU SEE, I'VE GOT A
DATE WITH THIS JEWISH GIRL AND I THOUGHT IT WOULD
BE NICE TO GO OUT ON YOM KIPPUR." THE FLIGHT
COMMANDER, A JEW HIMSELF, GOT FURIOUS AND RIPPED
UP THE PASS. MORRIS WAS RESTRICTED TO THE BASE FOR
THREE WEEKS AFTER THAT. TO THIS DAY, HE SAYS HE WAS
RIGHT, SINCE THE NOTICE DIDN'T SPECIFY THAT YOU HAD
TO BE JEWISH TO GET A PASS.
Where learned: NOT GIVEN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 05-12-1965
A YOUNG MAN, WITH A CONSIDERABLE NUMBER OF FRIENDS WHO
LOVED JOKING AROUND, WAS TO GET MARRIED. HIS FRIENDS
THREW HIM A STAG PARTY THE NIGHT BEFORE THE BIG EVENT.
AT THIS PARTY, THEY SUCCEEDED IN GETTING THE GUY
COMPLETELY DRUNK, SO THAT HE PASSED OUT. NOW, ONE
OF THE GUYS AT THE PARTY WAS A MEDICAL STUDENT AND HE
CAME UP WITH THE IDEA FOR THE BEST JOKE OF ALL TIME.
HE WENT TO HIS CAR AND GOT HIS EQUIPMENT FOR MAKING
PLASTER CASTS. THEN HE AND THE REST OF THE PARTY WENT
TO WORK. WHEN THEY FINISHED, THE POOR FELLOW WAS IN
A COMPLETE CAST FROM THE SHOULDERS DOWN. THE ONLY PART
LEFT WITHOUT THE PLASTER CAST, WAS HIS COCK, WHICH WAS
LEFT DANGLING OUT. HIS FRIENDS THEN CARRIED THE STATUE
OVER TO HIS GIRLS HOUSE AND PROPPED HIM UP ON THE PORCH,
FACING THE DOOR. THEY THEN RANG THE DOORBELL AND TOOK
OFF. WHEN THE GIRL CAME TO THE DOOR, ALL HELL BROKE
LOOSE. NOBODY KNOWS WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED AFTER THAT,
BUT IT TOOK THREE MONTHS BEFORE THE WEDDING ACTUALLY
TOOK PLACE.
Submitter comment:
I HEARD THIS LITTLE ANECDOTE AT A STAG PARTY FOR ONE OF
MY FRATERNITY BROTHERS AND IT WAS RELATED TO ME AS
BEING FACTUAL.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PENIS
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 05-22-1965
ANECDOTE
ON CERTAIN OCCASIONS, THE POPE COMES OUT ON THE BALCONY
OF THE VATICAN AND MAKES THE SIGN OF A BLESSING.
BUT, WHAT HE IS ACTUALLY SAYING IS, "OK YOU DEGOS,
GET OFF MY GRASS."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 11-03-1967
OLDEST PROFESSION ANECDOTE
FOUR MEN WERE FIGHTING OVER THE CLAIM TO THE OLDEST
PROFESSION. FIRST THE LAWYER CLAIMED THE HONOR ON THE
BASIS THAT A LAWYER WAS NEEDED WHEN CAIN KILLED ABEL.
SECOND, THE DOCTOR CLAIMED THE HONOR, BECAUSE HE WAS
NEEDED WHEN EVE CAME FROM ADAM. THEN THE ENGINEER
SPOKE UP CLAIMING THE ENGINEER WAS NEEDED TO BRING
THE WORLD OUT OF CHAOS. FINALLY, THE POLITICIAN
SPOKE UP AND ALL HE SAID WAS, "WHO DO YOU THINK WAS
RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CHAOS?"
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 12-04-1967
JEWISH JOKE
A CATHOLIC PRIEST AND A JEWISH RABBI LIVED CLOSE TO EACH
OTHER. ONE DAY THE PRIEST WAS GIVEN A NEW CAR AND
PROMPTLY WENT OUT AND BLESSED IT WITH WATER. THE
RABBI SAW THIS AND NOT TO BE OUTDONE, WENT INSIDE AND
CAME OUT WITH CUTTERS. HE WENT TO HIS CAR AND CUT OFF
A PIECE OF THE TAILPIPE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): CIRCUMCISION
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 10-27-1967
ANECDOTE
WHEN PERSONS CAME UP TO HEAVEN, IT WAS ST. PETER'S
JOB TO SHOW THEM AROUND AND HE WOULD TAKE THE NEWCOMERS
TO EVERY ROOM IN HEAVEN, EXCEPT ONE. ON ONE SUCH TOUR,
PETER TOOK SOME PROTESTANTS THROUGH HEAVEN, BUT UPON
COMING TO THE DOOR OF ONE ROOM, HE TIPTOED PAST AND
CAUTIONED HIS CHARGES TO KEEP QUIET. WHEN THEY ASKED
HIM WHY HE DID THIS, HE EXPLAINED, "THAT IS WHERE THE
CATHOLICS STAY WHO THINK THAT THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES
WHO ARE UP HERE."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-20-1967
ANECDOTE
THERE WAS A MAN WHO WAS VERY DEVOTED TO SAINT JOSEPH,
BUT NOT OTHERWISE OF A VERY RELIGIOUS DISPOSITION.
ON HIS DEATH, HE WENT TO HEAVEN AND ASKED ST. PETER
TO LET HIM IN. ST. PETER HAD TO REFUSE HIM,
BECAUSE OF HIS POOR RECORD, SO THE MAN CALLED ON
ST. JOSEPH TO HELP HIM. WELL, ST. JOSEPH HEARD AND CAME
TO INTERCEDE FOR HIM, BUT NOTHING ST. JOSEPH SAID COULD
SWAY ST. PETER. FINALLY, THEY GOT TO THE SHOUTING STAGE
AND ST. JOSEPH THREATENED TO LEAVE. ST. PETER STILL
REFUSED SO, ST. JOSEPH LOST HIS PATIENCE AND SHOUTED,
"MARY, GET THE KID, WE'RE LEAVING."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ADRIAN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-21-1967
ANECDOTE
AN ADULTERESS WAS BROUGHT BEFORE CHRIST FOR JUDGMENT.
AFTER WRITING SOMETHING ON THE GROUND, HE SAID, "LET
HE WHO IS WITHOUT SIN THROW THE FIRST STONE." HARDLY
HAD HE FINISHED SPEAKING, WHEN A STONE HIT THE WOMAN.
SIGHING, JESUS LOOKED UP AND SAID, "MOTHER, DID YOU
HAVE TO?"
Submitter comment:
FATHER TRENT, THEN OF ST. ALPHONSUS PARISH, TOLD THIS
ONE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-21-1967
ANECDOTE
THE POPE SIGNS HIMSELF, "THE SERVANT OF THE SERVANTS
OF GOD." THE CARDINALS SIGN THEMSELVES, "THE SERVANTS
OF THE SERVANT OF THE SERVANTS OF GOD."
THE BISHOPS SIGN THEMSELVES, "THE SERVANTS OF THE
SERVANTS OF THE SERVANT OF THE SERVANTS OF GOD."
THE PASTORS SIGN THEMSELVES, "THE SERVANTS OF THE
SERVANTS, OF THE SERVANTS OF THE SERVANT OF THE
SERVANTS OF GOD."
THE ASSISTANT PASTORS SIGN THEMSELVES, "THE SERVANTS
OF THE SERVANTS OF THE SERVANTS OF THE SERVANTS OF
THE SERVANTS OF THE SERVANT OF THE SERVANTS OF GOD."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ADRIAN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-29-1967
JEWISH JOKE
FOND JEWISH PARENTS WANTED TO KNOW WHAT THEIR SON WOULD
BE WHEN HE GREW UP, SO THEY WENT TO THEIR RABBI. HE
TOLD THEM THAT THEY SHOULD PUT A DOLLAR BILL, A BINGO
CARD, AND A GLASS OF WINE ON A TABLE WHERE THEY COULD
BE SEEN BY THE BOY WHEN HE CAME HOME FROM SCHOOL. IF
HE TOOK THE CARD, HE WOULD BE A GAMBLER. IF HE DRANK
THE WINE, HE WOULD ENTER RELIGION. IF HE TOOK THE BILL,
HE WOULD BE A FINANCIER. THIS WAS DONE AND THE RABBI
AND PARENTS SETTLED BACK TO WATCH THE OUTCOME. SOON
THE BOY CAME HOME, WENT TO THE TABLE, DRANK THE WINE,
PUT THE BILL IN HIS WALLET AND THE CARD IN HIS POCKET.
THE RABBI SEEING THIS, STRUCK HIMSELF AND EXCLAIMED,
"MY GOD, HE'S GOING TO BE A CATHOLIC PRIEST."
Submitter comment:
THE INFORMANT HEARD THIS AT HIS OFFICE IN DOWNTOWN
DETROIT.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
I WAS SITTING IN A BAR THE OTHER NIGHT AND THIS GIRL
WALKED IN WEARING THE TIGHTEST, BRIGHT GREEN SLACKS
I HAVE EVER SEEN. THEY WERE NOT ONLY PAINTED ON, THEY
LOOKED LIKE THEY WERE GROWING THERE. I WAS SO
ASTONISHED THAT I WENT OVER AND SAT DOWN NEXT TO HER
AND STARTED STARING AT THEM. LORD ONLY KNOWS HOW MUCH
TROUBLE I HAVE GETTING INTO A PAIR OF LEVI'S. SO I
ASKED HER, I SAID, "PARDON ME, BUT HOW DO YOU GET INTO
THOSE THINGS?" THEN SHE LOOKED AT ME AND SAID, "WELL,
YOU COULD START BY BUYING ME A BEER."
Where learned: NOT GIVEN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 05-22-1965
SICK JOKE
I DON'T LIKI FEDDO DAD.
SHUT UP AND EAT WHAT I PUT IN FRONT OF YOU.
Submitter comment: THE INFORMANT DOES NOT KNOW WHERE HE HEARD THIS JOKE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): ANIMAL: DOG ; FIDO
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
LET'S GO TO THE WOODS
(AN OLDER MAN AND A TEENAGE GIRL)
DEEP VOICE: LET'S GO TO THE WOODS.
HIGH VOICE: BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE WOODS.
DEEP VOICE: LET'S GO TO THE WOODS.
HIGH VOICE: BUT IF WE GO TO THE WOODS, I'LL SCREAM.
DEEP VOICE: HOW LOUD CAN YOU SCREAM?
HIGH VOICE: AHH...(ALMOST A WIMPER)
DEEP VOICE WITH GUSTO: LET'S GO TO THE WOODS.
Submitter comment: INFORMANT HEARD THIS AT THE UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
SICK JOKE
BUT MOM, I DON'T WANT TO GO TO ENGLAND.
SHUT UP AND KEEP SWIMMING.
Submitter comment: THE INFORMANT DOES NOT KNOW WHERE HE HEARD THIS JOKE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
COOL COURSE
DID YOU KNOW THAT THEY ARE OFFERING A NEW COURSE?
IT'S A STUDY OF THE FEMALE ANATOMY, BY BRAILE.
Submitter comment: THE INFORMANT HEARD THIS AT THE UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
HERMAN THE BULL
HERMAN THE BULL WAS ON ONE SIDE OF THE FENCE, AND
BETSIE THE COW WAS ON THE OTHER. BETSIE WINKED AT
HERMAN AND HERMAN JUMPED THE FENCE. BETSIE ASKED,
"YOU'RE HERMAN THE BULL, AREN'T YOU?" "HERMAN,
HELL," SAID HE, "YOU'D BETTER CALL ME DASIE."
(HERMAN DIDN'T JUMP HIGH ENOUGH)
Submitter comment:
THE INFORMANT HEARD THIS AT THE NATIONAL BANK OF
DETROIT, MAIN BRANCH, ABOUT TWO YEARS AGO.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 04-08-1965
DO YOU KNOW HOW TO KEEP A POLACK OUT OF THE WATER?
THROW IN A BAR OF SOAP. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO SAVE A POLAK WHO IS DROWNING? (PERSON WHO IS LISTENING, AT THIS POINT ANSWERS NO). GOOD.
COLLECTED FROM A FRIEND.
Submitter comment: HEARD THIS FROM A FRIEND AT SCHOOL.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 05-15-1965
A LADY WENT INTO A BUTCHER SHOP ONE DAY TO BUY SOME
BRAINS. LOOKING INTO THE CASE, SHE SAW GERMAN BRAINS
FOR $4 A POUND, NEXT TO THEM RUSSIAN BRAINS FOR $5 A
POUND, AND NEXT TO THEM POLISH BRAINS FOR $9 A POUND.
"WHY ON EARTH IS THERE SUCH A DIFFERENCE IN PRICE
BETWEEN POLISH BRAINS AND THE OTHERS? " SHE INQUIRED
OF THE BUTCHER. "LADY," HE REPLIED, "DO YOU REALIZE
HOW MANY POLACKS IT TAKES TO MAKE ONE POUND OF BRAINS?"
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT PASSED ON THIS JOKE TO ME AFTER HEARING
A FRIEND TELL IT AT WORK.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 05-05-1965
TWO MEN WERE TALKING AND ONE ASKED THE OTHER, "DO YOU
KNOW WHY IT TAKES THREE POLACKS TO CHANGE A
LIGHTBULB?" "NO," REPLIED HIS FRIEND. "WELL, IT
TAKES ONE TO SCREW IN THE BULB AND THE OTHER TWO TO
TURN THE LADDER."
Submitter comment:
I HEARD THIS PARTICULAR JOKE SEVERAL TIMES FROM
SEVERAL DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 05-06-1965