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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

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WHEN I'M DEAD AND IN MY GRAVE,
NO MORE WHISKEY SHALL I CRAVE,
FOR ON MY TOMBSTONE SHALL BE WROTE,
MANY A QUART'S WENT DOWN MY THROAT.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; GARDEN CITY

Keyword(s): DRINKING ; METER: ANAPESTIC DIMETER ; MONOLOGUE QUATRAIN EPITAPH EUPHEMISM ; POOR GRAMMAR ; RHYME: MASCULINE, AABB

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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SPARKLE, STARKLE, LITTLE TWINK,
WHO THE TELL YOU ARE I HINK.
I'M NOT IMBRICATED,
I'M NOT AS DRUNK AS SOME TINKLE PEEP I AM.
I'VE ONLY HAD TEA MARTOONIES,
ANYWAY I'VE ALL DAY SOBER TO SUNDAY UP IN.
I FOOL SO FEELISH, I DON'T KNOW WHO IS ME YET,
BUT THE DRUNKER I STAND HERE,
THE LONGER I GET.

Submitter comment: LEARNED IN GRADE SCHOOL.

Where learned: OHIO

Keyword(s): CONTRADICTIONS MONOLOGUE HUMOR ; EUPHEMISM PARODY DRINKING ; NONSENSE WORDS METER TROCHEE ; TANGLETALK

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse Lyrical Verse

Date learned: 00-00-1948

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IF YOU'RE GOING TO PUSH ON THE THROTTLE,
DON'T PULL (DRINK) ON THE BOTTLE.

Submitter comment: A WARNING!

Where learned: DETROIT ; MICHIGAN, ASSUMED

Keyword(s): AUTOMOBILE CAR ; DRINKING DRUNKENNESS

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Food Drink
Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Proverb Proverb
ART CRAFT ARCHITECTURE -- Means of transportation Vehicle propelled by mechanical or other force on land
Food Drink -- N447

Date learned: 11-00-1971

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VERSE

MM[ CANDY IS DANDY,
BUT LIQUOR IS QUICKER.

Submitter comment: THIS WAS WRITTEN IN AUTOGRAPH BOOK 1938

Data entry tech comment: DIVIDED BY KEYPUNCHER

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): DRINKING ; OBSERVATION

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Autograph Verse Chimney corner wisdom, advice, humorous fortune

Date learned: 10-06-1970

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IT WOULD BE BAD LUCK TO PASS A PERSON GOING THE
OTHER DIRECTION ON A FLIGHT OF STAIRS.

Submitter comment: FAMILY SUPERSTITION--IRISH

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DEARBORN

James Callow Keyword(s): WALKING

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Street Trip Relations between relatives, friends, host and guest Social class Rank
BELIEF -- Sign Geometric figure Angular forms
BELIEF -- Bad luck Activities

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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IT IS BAD LUCK TO SPLIT A TREE, THAT IS IF ONE PERSON
WALKS ON THE LEFT SIDE OF THE TREE AND ANOTHER PERSON
WALKS ON THE RIGHT SIDE.

Submitter comment: INFORMANT LEARNED IN CHILDHOOD.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): WHILE WALKING TOGETHER.

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Bad luck Activities
BELIEF -- Bad luck Plants

Date learned: 01-26-1971

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IF YOU GET A HOLE IN YOUR LEFT SOCK BEFORE YOU GET
ONE IN YOUR RIGHT SOCK, YOU ARE GOING TO GET SOME
MONEY.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): STOCKING

Subject headings: Observation

Date learned: NOT GIVEN

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Entry filtered.

THE GORDON NAGEL TRAIL

THERE WAS A GIRL AND A GUY PARKING ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD ALONG THE
GORDON NAGEL TRAIL. THE GUY GOT PISSED BECAUSE THE GIRL WOULDN'T PUT
OUT SO HE KICKED HER OUT OF THE CAR AND TOOK OFF. SHE WAS NEVER HEARD
FROM AGAIN. IT IS SAID THAT SHE DIED IN THE WOODS BY THE ROAD AND NOW
HER GHOST LIVES THERE. AT MIDNIGHT EACH NIGHT SHE COMES BACK TO THE
PLACE HER BOYFRIEND LEFT HER AND SEARCHES FOR HIM. IT IS SAID THAT IF
YOU DRIVE BY THAT PLACE AT MIDNIGHT YOUR CAR WILL STALL AND WILL NOT
START UNTIL SHE HAS SEARCHED YOUR CAR FOR HER BOYFRIEND.

Submitter comment: THERE HAVE BEEN SEVERAL REPORTS OF CARS STALLING ON THIS ROAD LATE AT
NIGHT. IT IS AN ISOLATED ROAD BETWEEN TWO TOWNS. IT HAS BEEN SAID
THAT THE HIGH VOLTAGE POWER LINES THAT RUN ALONG THE ROAD CAUSE THE
CARS TO STALL BUT THIS HAS NEVER BEEN PROVEN.

Where learned: PENNSYLVANIA ; POTTSVILLE

James Callow Keyword(s): PARKING

Subject headings: PROSE NARRATIVE -- Ghost Spirit Phantom Specter
PROSE NARRATIVE -- Product or activity of man or animal
BELIEF -- Product or activity of man or animal
Filter - Mature Content

Date learned: 00-00-1968

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FOR GOOD LUCK FOR A YEAR, A GOOD LUCKING PERSON, MAN OR WOMAN
1MUST RING THE DOORBELL ON NEW YEARS EVE OR DAY.

Submitter comment: I KNOW OF MANY FAMILIES BESIDES THE LOCKHARTS WHO BELIEVE IN THIS

Where learned: DETROIT ; TOLD IN

James Callow Keyword(s): GOOD LOOKING? HANDSOME?

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- January 1 New Year's
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- December 31 New Year's Eve
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- Measure of time Year
CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- December 21 solstice to March 20
BELIEF -- Good luck P881.42

Date learned: 01-01-1972

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MURDER PROSE

THIS CHICK AND GUY IN CLEVELAND WERE OUT IN THE PARK AND THE
GUY IN THE
CAR THOUGHT HE HEARD NOISES, BUT DIDN'T PAY ANY ATTENTION. THE
SECOND TIME HE HEARD IT, HE KNEW IT WAS A NOISE BEING DONE
DELIBERATELY.
IT KEPT UP AND THE GUY DECIDED TO GET OUT; BY THE WAY, THIS WAS A
CONVERTIBLE. HE TOLD THE GIRL TO LOCK THE DOORS AND GET DOWN ON THE
FLOOR. HE STEPS OUT. SO HE'S OUTSIDE, NOW THIS IS PRETTY LATE AT
NIGHT. SHE GOT PRETTY WORRIED BECAUSE HE DIDN'T COME BACK.
THE NEXT THING
SHE KNOWS IS A FAINT SCRATCHING ON THE TOP OF THE CAR IN A
RHYTHMIC MOTION.
SHE DOESN'T DO ANYTHING, ONLY EXACTLY WHAT HE SAID.
LATER ANOTHER
CAR PULLS UP, SHE COULDN'T SEE WHO IT WAS. THEN SHE SAW A
FLASHLIGHT FLASHING AROUND IN THE CAR. IT WAS A COP. HE SAID
FOR HER
TO GET OUT. THE COP SAID DON'T LOOK BEHIND YOU AND GET INTO
MY CAR.
SHE DID, BUT HER CURIOSITY WAS AROUSED. IT WAS JUST THE BREAK OF
DAWN, SO THERE WAS JUST ENOUGH LIGHT. SO SHE LOOKED BEHIND AND
SAW HER
BOYFRIEND HANGING BY HIS NECK FROM A TREE SWINGING ABOVE THE CAR.

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; RENO HALL

James Callow Keyword(s): OHIO ; PARKING

Subject headings: Favorites
PROSE NARRATIVE -- Human Being

Date learned: 09-25-1972

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Entry filtered.

Ethnic Joke: Polish

WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A POLISH WEDDING AND A POLISH
FUNERAL? ONE LESS DRUNK.

Data entry tech comment:

BN updated by TRD

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; WARREN

James Callow Keyword(s): DRINKING

Subject headings: RIDDLE -- Riddle Question

Date learned: 00001970 SUMMER

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WHAT TIME IS IT?

WHAT TIME IS IT? TIME TO GET A NEW WATCH. THIS REBUKE CAME
FROM MAUREEN'S HIGH SCHOOL DAYS AT MERCY

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): ASKING TIME OF DAY

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula

Date learned: 11-08-1972

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WHAT TIME IS IT?

WHAT TIME IS IT? HALF-PAST KISSIN' TIME, TIME TO KISS AGAIN
MAUREEN'S GRANDFATHER JOE LANNEN AN 87 YEAR OLD WIDOWER WAS HER
INFORMANT. HE IS OF IRISH DESCENT AND RESIDES AT 14545 WOODMONT
IN DETROIT

Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): ASKING TIME OF DAY

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula

Date learned: 11-08-1972

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SAINT PATRICK'S DAY

DRINKING GREEN BEER IS ANOTHER TRADITIONAL CUSTOM. YOU DRINK THE
HEALTH OF IRELAND, GOD, AND YOUR FAMILY.

Where learned: HOME ; RELATIVES HOME

James Callow Keyword(s): DRINKING A TOAST

Subject headings: CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- March 17 Feast of St. Patrick
Food Drink -- Alcoholic beverage Fermented
BELIEF -- Color
SPEECH -- Formula

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TESTS

SMOKE ONLY BEFORE AND AFTER A TEST AND YOU WILL PASS IT.

Where learned: HOME ; MICHIGAN ; DEARBORN

James Callow Keyword(s): MAGICAL CONTROL ; SMOKING TABU DURING EXAMINATIONS

Subject headings: BELIEF -- School

Date learned: CA1963-1975

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CORNCOB PIPES

SMOKING A CORNCOB PIPE WILL BRING GOOD LUCK.

Where learned: HOME ; MICHIGAN ; DEARBORN ;

James Callow Keyword(s): SMOKING

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Product or activity of man or animal
BELIEF -- Good luck P881.1
BELIEF -- Good luck P881.2

Date learned: CA1963-1975

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IF YOUR BEES SWARM, AND SHOW SIGNS OF MOVING AWAY, OR IF A WILD
SWARM FLIES ONTO YOUR PREMISES, ALL THE FAMILY HAD BETTER 'RUN OUT
AND RING BELLS AND BLOW HORNS FOR ALL YOU ARE WORTH.' THE BEES WILL
EITHER BE SO CHARMED OR CONFUSED THAT THEY WILL SETTLE DOWN.

Submitter comment: HIS FATHER KEPT SEVERAL SWARMS OF BEES AND FOLLOWED THIS ON
ONE OCCASION, AT WHICH TIME THE BEES SETTLED DOWN AND THE WILD ONES
WERE INCORPORATED INTO THE GROUP.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

James Callow Keyword(s): NOISE NOISEMAKING

Subject headings: BELIEF -- Insect

Date learned: 03-10-1968

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GERMAN PROVERB

BEER AFTER WINE IS VERY FINE;
WINE AFTER BEER, OH DEAR.
BIER AUF WEIN, SCHMECHT UNS FEIN. (GERMAN)
WEIN AUF BIER, GERADE DIR.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Keyword(s): FOOD

James Callow Keyword(s): ADVICE: NEGATIVE ; ADVICE: POSITIVE ; DRINKING ; ELLIPSIS ; RHYME

Subject headings: Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Proverb
PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim

Date learned: 11-14-1968

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TRUTH

DON'T TAKE ANY WOODEN NICKELS.

Submitter comment: HIS GRANDFATHER SAID THIS.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; YPSILANTI

James Callow Keyword(s): ADVICE: NEGATIVE ; GULLIBILITY ; LEAVETAKING FORMULA

Subject headings: SPEECH -- Formula
PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim

Date learned: 10-15-1967

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BEFORE A FRESHMAN CAN STEP ON THE BIG M IN THE CENTRE OF THE
DIAG, HE MUST HAVE TAKEN HIS FIRST EXAM, OR HE WILL FLUNK OUT OF
SCHOOL WITHIN THE YEAR.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ROYAL OAK

James Callow Keyword(s): SLANG--DIAG FOR DIAGONAL? ; WALKING PROHIBITION

Subject headings: BELIEF -- School

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