Dr. James T. Callow publications
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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive
Your search for B662 returned 343 results.
RON: HOW DID YOU LIKE THE PLAY LAST NIGHT?
DON: I SAW THE FIRST ACT, BUT NOT THE SECOND.
RON: WHY DIDN'T YOU STAY?
DON: I COULDN'T WAIT THAT LONG. IT SAID ON THE
PROGRAM "TWO YEARS LATER."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 10-00-1968
TWO DRUNKS WERE DRIVING ALONG. THE ONE DRUNK SAYS
TO THE OTHER, "LOOK OUT FOR THAT BRIDGE! IT'S
COMING RIGHT AT US!" SO THE OTHER ONE SAYS,
"I'M NOT DRIVING, YOU ARE!"
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 09-16-1969
A COP PULLS OVER THE TWO DRUNKS AND SAYS, "LET ME SEE
YOUR LICENSE." AND THE ONE DRUNK WHO IS DRIVING SAYS,
"THAT'S A GOOD ONE ON YOU, OFFICER. I HAVEN'T GOT
A LICENSE!"
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 09-16-1969
THE GREAT BINGE
THERE WAS A NOTORIOUS DRUNKARD WHO COULD GO ON THE
LONGEST DRINKING BINGES OF ANY DRINKER IN THE
NORTHERN HILLS OF ARKANSAS. ONE TIME, HE WAS ON A
THREE DAY BINGE. ON THE THIRD DAY, HE WAS WALKING
HOME, AND PASSED OUT AND ROLLED IN THE DITCH ON THE
SIDE OF THE ROAD. THE NEXT MORNING, A GRADER
CAME BY AND FOUND HIM LYING IN THE DITCH. THE MEN THOUGHT
HE WAS DEAD, SO THEY THREW HIM OVER THE TOP OF THE
GRADER AND PROCEEDED TO GRADE THE ROAD. THEY GRADED
THE ROAD TO THE NEXT TOWN ABOUT THREE MILES FROM WHERE THEY
FOUND THE DRUNK. AS THEY STOPPED THE DRUNK WOKE UP AND
WALKED AWAY NOT KNOWING WHAT HAD HAPPENED OR WHERE HE
WAS OR HOW HE GOT THERE.
Where learned: NOT GIVEN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-08-1968
CITY BOY IN THE COUNTRY
A BOY FROM THE CITY COMES TO VISIT HIS COUSIN IN THE
COUNTRY. THE COUNTRY BOY SAYS, "LET'S GO EAT SOME
PERSIMMONS." SO THE TWO BOYS GO DOWN TO THE PERSIMMON
TREE. THE COUNTRY BOY CLIMBS UP THE TREE TO GET THE
RIPE ONES, BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT THE GREEN PERSIMMONS
WILL MAKE A PERSON PUCKER UP SO BAD, THAT HE WON'T BE
ABLE TO TALK FOR A LITTLE WHILE. THE CITY BOY DOESN'T
KNOW THIS AND WHILE HIS COUSIN IS UP IN THE TREE, HE
GRABS A GREEN PERSIMMON AND EATS IT. THEN IT HAPPENS:
CITY BOY: HE(Y?) COUSIN.
COUNTRY BOY: WHAT?
CITY BOY: COME DOWN HERE QUICK!
COUNTRY BOY: WHAT FOR?
CITY BOY: I'M CLOSING UP FAST.
Where learned: NOT GIVEN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-08-1968
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THE DRUNK AND THE BARTENDER
A DRUNK WALKED INTO A BAR AND SAID, "I'LL BUY
EVERYONE HERE A DRINK." THE BARTENDER GAVE EVERYONE
A DRINK AND GAVE THE DRUNK A BILL FOR $224. THE DRUNK
REPLIED TO THIS, "HA, HA, I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY."
THE BARTENDER THEN THREW HIM OUT INTO THE STREET,
AFTER BEATING HIM UP QUITE SEVERELY. TEN MINUTES
LATER THE DRUNK CAME BACK IN AND POINTED TO THE
BARTENDER SAYING: "I'LL BUY EVERYONE IN THE HOUSE
A DRINK EXCEPT YOU. YOU GET TOO NASTY AFTER ONE
DRINK."
Where learned: NOT GIVEN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: NOT GIVEN
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IN A LITTLE ITALIAN CITY THERE LIVED A VERY POOR
MAN. ALL HE OWNED WAS AN OLD BICYCLE OF WHICH HE WAS
VERY PROUD. ONE DAY HE WENT TO A SMALL GROCERY
STORE TO BUY SOME VEGETABLES AND WHEN HE CAME
BACK, HE FOUND HIS BICYCLE ALL BROKEN INTO LITTLE
PIECES--PROBABLY SOME EVIL BOY DECIDED TO PLAY A
BAD JOKE ON HIM. THE MAN BEGAN TO CRY. AT THAT
TIME, A FUNERAL PROCESSION ARRIVED AND THE MAN JOINED THE
RELATIVES OF THE DEAD WOMAN, CRYING SO PITIFULLY THAT
A FRIEND OF THE DEAD WOMAN STOPPED HIM AND SAID,
"COME ON NOW, SHE WAS OLD AND DECREPIT, YOU KNOW."
TO THAT THE MAN REPLIED, "YES, BUT SHE STILL HAD
TWO PEDALS AND A HANDLE-BAR!"
Submitter comment:
THE ABOVE IS AN EXAMPLE OF THE FUNNY STORIES CHILDREN
TELL IN ITALY. I REMEMBER HEARING AND TELLING ONE
SIMILAR TO THIS WHEN I WAS YOUNGER.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): TRANSLATION---ITALIAN VERSION ON 5 X 8 CARD.
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 10-06-1971
A LADY WENT TO A PRIEST TO COMPLAIN ABOUT HER
HUSBAND'S TERRIBLE DRINKING. SHE PLEADED WITH THE
FATHER TO TALK TO HER HUSBAND TO END HIS "EVIL WAYS."
SO THE FATHER REQUESTED THAT THE HUSBAND COME IN TO
TALK. THE HUSBAND RELUCTANTLY AGREED TO GO.
"SON, I HAVE HEARD THAT YOU ARE PLAYING WITH THE
'DEVIL'S BREW.' BUT I AM NOT GOING TO TELL YOU TO
STOP SIPPING THE 'DEVIL'S NECTAR.' INSTEAD, I AM
GOING TO TELL YOU ABOUT A MAN WHO DRANK SO MUCH THAT
WHEN HE WENT TO BLOW OUT A CANDLE HIS BREATH MADE IT
IGNITE MORE AND HE CAUGHT ON FIRE. NOW SON, I
WANT YOU TO GO HOME AND THINK ABOUT THAT."
THE MAN WENT HOME AND THOUGHT ABOUT IT. HE RETURNED
TO THE PRIEST TWO WEEKS LATER. "WELL, SON, HAVE YOU
THOUGHT ABOUT IT?" "INDEED, I HAVE FATHER! I WON'T
GIVE UP DRINKING BUT I PROMISE YOU I WILL NEVER BLOW OUT
A CANDLE."
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT REMEMBERED THIS STORY BEING TOLD AT A WAKE
IN THE EARLY 1920S. INFORMANT ADDED THAT THIS STORY
HAS BECOME A CLASSIC AMONG HIS CIRCLE OF FRIENDS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; FARMINGTON
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-15-1971
AN IRISHMAN BY THE NAME OF CORBETT CAME TO AMERICA
BECAUSE HE HEARD IT WAS THE LAND OF GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY.
LIKE MANY IMMIGRANTS HE WENT TO WORK IN A FACTORY.
HIS JOB WAS WORKING A MACHINE THAT MADE ROUND DISKS FOR
MACHINE PARTS. BUT CORBETT HAD HEARD AMERICA'S
"STREETS WERE PAVED WITH GOLD" AND MONEY COULD BE FOUND
EVERYWHERE. SO HE ASSUMED THAT THE DISKS HE WAS MAKING
WERE VALUABLE TREASURES. SOMEHOW THE "TREASURES" THAT
WERE NOT USED WERE NEVER PICKED UP, SO HE TOOK IT
UPON HIMSELF TO BE THE COLLECTOR.
ONE DAY AFTER WORK HE WENT TO CLANCEY'S BAR. AFTER
SEVERAL GLASSES OF BEER CORBETT DECIDED TO PAY FOR
THEM. FROM HIS POCKET HE DREW ONE OF THOSE LARGE
DISKS AND LEFT FOR THE DOOR. CORBETT WAS JUST ABOUT
TO LEAVE WHEN CLANCEY SHOUTED AND TOLD HIM TO COME
BACK AND PAY HIM. CORBETT STAGGERED BACK TO THE BAR
AND CAREFULLY LOOKED AT THE TOKEN.
"LORDY BE! YOU MEAN I LEFT YOU THAT?"
HE QUICKLY TOOK A SMALLER TOKEN OUT OF HIS POCKET
AND STAGGERED TO THE DOOR. CLANCEY WAS STRICKEN
WITH AMAZEMENT.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT SAID THAT THIS INCIDENT ACTUALLY HAPPENED
ALTHOUGH HE HAS HEARD MANY VERSIONS OF THE STORY
HIMSELF. INFORMANT SAID THIS HAPPENED IN THE LATE
1920S.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; FARMINGTON
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-15-1971
THERE ONCE WAS TWO DRUNKS AT THE WAKE OF THEIR BEST
FRIEND. AFTER SEVERAL HOURS, THEY COULD NO LONGER
STAND TO BE SOBER, AND DECIDED TO HAVE A DRINK. THE
ONLY PROBLEM WAS THAT THEY DID NOT HAVE ANY LEFT.
SO THEY DECIDED TO GO TO THE CORNER BAR. THEY DID
NOT WANT TO LEAVE THEIR "DEPARTED FRIEND," SO THEY
TOOK HIM WITH THEM. WHEN THEY GOT TO THE BAR, THEY
ORDERED THREE DRINKS INSTEAD OF TWO. ROUND AFTER
ROUND THEY FOLLOWED THE SAME ROUTINE, EACH TAKING
TURNS DRINKING THE CORPSE'S DRINK.
AFTER A WHILE THE TWO DRUNKS BECAME HUNGRY SO THEY
DRAGGED THE CORPSE OVER TO THE TABLE WHILE THEY
WENT TO EAT IN ANOTHER ROOM. MEANWHILE, THE
BARTENDER WENT OVER TO THE TABLE WHERE THE CORPSE
WAS SLUMPED OVER AND DEMANDED PAYMENT FOR THE DRINKS.
AFTER SEVERAL ATTEMPTS TO WAKE HIM, HE THREATENED
TO KILL HIM IF HE DID NOT RESPOND. THE BARTENDER,
SEEING THAT HE WOULD NOT GET A RESPONSE, TOOK THE BODY
AND THREW IT AGAINST THE WALL. AT THAT MOMENT THE TWO
DRUNKS RETURNED, SCREAMING FOR THE POLICE.
"YOU'VE KILLED OUR FRIEND!"
"IT WAS HIS FAULT! HE PULLED A KNIFE!"
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT FIRMLY STATED THAT THIS ACTUALLY OCCURRED AND
THAT HE PERSONALLY KNEW ALL THOSE INVOLVED. INFORMANT
SAID THAT IT OCCURRED AROUND 1917 BUT HAS SINCE BECOME A
FAVORITE STORY OF OLDER DETROIT IRISHMEN.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; FARMINGTON
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-15-1971
THERE WAS ONCE A DRUNK WHO WAS GIVEN A JOB AS A
POLICEMAN IN A SMALL INDIANA TOWN. AFTER A TRAINING
PROGRAM, HE WAS ALLOWED TO GO ON HIS BEAT, WHICH ONLY
SPANNED TWO BLOCKS. TO BOOST HIS COURAGE, HE TOOK
A "NIP OR TWO." AFTER A FEW DAYS HE DISAPPEARED.
MOST PEOPLE THOUGHT HE WENT ON A BINGE. A FEW DAYS
LATER, HOWEVER, HE SUDDENLY APPEARED HAGGERED AND
TATTERED AT THE POLICE STATION.
"WHAT HAPPENED?" SHOUTED THE OTHER POLICEMEN.
"WELL, I WAS COMIN' OUT OF O'TOOLE'S BAR AND I SAW
THIS TRUCK GOIN' THROUGH A STOP SIGN. SO I DECIDED
TO HOP ON THE BACK OF THE BUS AND GIVE EM A TICKET.
HOW DID I KNOW HE WAS GOIN' TO PITTSBURG?"
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT HEARD THIS STORY IN A SPEAKEASY DURING
PROHIBITION. HE DOES NOT REALLY BELIEVE IT
HAPPENED BUT CALLED IT A "GEM."
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; FARMINGTON
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-15-1971
TWO STONE DEAF DRUNKS WERE SITTING IN A PUB WHEN ONE
ASKED, "WHERE ARE WE?" "WIMBLY," THE OTHER ANSWERED.
"LORDY BE! I THOUGHT IT WAS THURSDAY! LET'S HAVE
ANOTHER DRINK!"
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT SAID HE HEARD THIS STORY FROM AN OLD
IRISHMAN VISITING AMERICA AROUND 1925. INFORMANT
CONSIDERS THIS ONE OF HIS FAVORITE STORIES.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; FARMINGTON
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-15-1971
TWO DRUNKS WERE SITTING IN A PUB WHEN ONE SAID TO
THE OTHER, "WHAT IS THE QUICKEST AND CHEAPEST WAY TO
GET TO THE OTHER SIDE OF IRELAND?" "SWIM," MUMBLED
THE OTHER.
Submitter comment:
INFORMANT SAID THAT HE HEARD THIS RECENTLY FROM AN
OLD FRIEND WHO JUST RETURNED FROM IRELAND.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; FARMINGTON
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 11-15-1971
I ONCE TRIED TO WRITE A SONG ABOUT DRINKING, BUT I
COULDN'T GET PAST THE FIRST TWO BARS.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PUN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 00-00-1971
LEGEND
KAREN TELLS ME THERE ARE MANY STORIES IN ARMENIAN
TRADITION ABOUT A MAN CALLED NASAHADEHAJA. HE
WAS SUPPOSEDLY A GREAT PHILOSOPHER WHOM EVERYONE
LISTENED TO. ONE DAY NASAHADEHAJA WAS SITTING
UNDER A TREE CRYING AND A WOMAN CAME UP AND SAID,
"NASAHADEHAJA, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?" HE ANSWERED THAT HE
WAS WORRIED THAT WHAT IF HE HAD A SON WHO CLIMBED
UP THE TREE, FELL DOWN, AND DIED. KAREN LAUGHED AT
THAT POINT, THOUGH I REALLY DIDN'T SEE THE HUMOR IN
THE STORY. SHE SAID THE MORAL WAS NOT TO WASTE YOUR
LIFE WORRYING ABOUT WHAT COULD (UNDERLINED) HAPPEN.
Where learned: COLUMBIA REALTY OFFICE
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 02-26-1971
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE ALCOHOLIC WITH THE FINICKY
STOMACH? HE COULDN'T EAT OLIVES UNLESS THEY WERE
STERILIZED IN GIN.
Where learned: Vietnam
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Stupid man or woman |
Date learned: 10-30-1967