Dr. James T. Callow publications
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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive
Your search for B660 returned 470 results.
JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE COMPOSER WHO TOOK TOO MANY BATHS?
HE BEGAN TO WRITE SOAP OPERAS.
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE MAN WHO SAT IN FRONT OF AN ELECTRIC FAN
WITH A B-B GUN BECAUSE HE WANTED TO SHOOT THE BREEZE?
James Callow Keyword(s): SHOOT THE BREEZE: ENGAGE IN CONVERSATION
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE GIRL WHO WENT TO THE BEACH AND BAKED
HERSELF UNDER THE HOT SUN FOR SIX HOURS? SHE WANTED TO BE
THE TOAST OF THE TOWN.
James Callow Keyword(s): TOAST OF THE TOWN: CELEBRITY
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE ACCIDENT AT THE ARMY CAMP? NO, WHAT
HAPPENED? A JEEP RAN OVER A POPCORN BOX AND KILLED TWO KERNELS.
James Callow Keyword(s): PUN: KERNELS FOR COLONELS
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE BANKER WHO COULD NO LONGER RIDE A BIKE
BECAUSE HE LOST HIS BALANCE?
James Callow Keyword(s): ACCOUNTING
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE NEW DANCE CALLED THE ELEVATOR? IT HAS
NO STEPS.
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE COP THAT RAN OVER HIMSELF?
A YOUNG POLICE OFFICER WENT TO THE CORNER STORE TO
BUY HIMSELF A PACK OF CIGARETTES. AFTER LEARNING THAT
THIS STORE DID NOT HAVE HIS BRAND, HE ASKED THE STORE
CLERK IF SHE COULD GO ACROSS THE STREET FOR HIM AND BUY
HIM HIS BRAND. "I'M TIRED," HE REPLIED.
SHE EXPLAINED TO HIM THAT SHE WAS THE ONLY ONE WORKING
AND SHE WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO GO FOR HIM. THE POLICEMAN
ACCEPTED HER REFUSAL AND RAN OVER HIMSELF.
Submitter comment: ANOTHER ONE OF GRANDPA FOURNIER'S DUMB JOKES.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): JOKES
James Callow Keyword(s): PUN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00001978CA
"I DON'T HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM. I DRINK, I GET DRUNK,
I FALL DOWN: NO PROBLEM!"
Submitter comment:
MY INFORMANT TELLS ME THAT THIS IS A FAVORITE JOKE OF
HIS FATHER'S.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 11-08-1985
Entry filtered.
BLACK-AMERICAN JOKE
CLOTELLE AND WILLIE MAE WERE EXCELLENT RABBIT
HUNTERS. ONE DAY THEY BOTH HAPPENED TO SPOT
A RABBIT AND THEY BOTH SHOT AT THE RABBIT
AT THE SAME TIME. THEY ARGUED CONTINUOUSLY
ABOUT WHO THE RABBIT BELONGED TO. THE
DEPUTY SHERIFF CAME ALONG AND ASKED "WHAT
Y'ALL ARGUING BOUT? THEY EACH CLAIMED THE
RABBIT WAS THEIRS. HE COULDN'T SETTLE THE
ARGUMENT, SO HE TOOK THEM TO THE STATION
TO SEE THE HIGH SHERIFF. THE HIGH SHERIFF
WAS SITTING IN A CHAIR EATING WALNUTS. HE
ASKED THE WOMEN WHAT WAS THE PROBLEM? CLOTELLE
REPLIED, "I KILT THE RABBIT"; WILLIE MAE SAID,
"I KILT THE RABBIT". THE SHERIFF THEN SAID,
"WELL, WHICHEVER ONE OF YOU PERFORMS THE BEST
TRICK, GETS THE RABBIT." CLOTELLE CHEWED
TOBACCO, SO SHE STOOD 12 FEET FROM THE DOOR
AND SPIT A CLEAN SHOT THROUGH THE KEYHOLE
WITHOUT TOUCHING A SIDE. THEN WILLIE MAE
JUMPED UP AND SAID, "SHERIFF, WHATCHA EATING,
WALNUTS?" THE SHERIFF REPLIED, "YEAH." WILLIE
MAE INSTRUCTED HIM TO SIT IN HIS CHAIR, CLOSE
HIS EYES, REAR YOUR HEAD BACK AND THROW ME ONE
OF THEM WALNUTS. HE DID SO. SHE PUT THE WALNUT
BETWEEN HER LEGS, CRACKED IT, PEELED IT AND SHOT
IT BACK IN THE SHERIFF'S MOUTH. THE SHERIFF
THEN REPLIED, "WILLIE MAE, WHEN YOU FINISH FRYING
THAT THAR RABBIT, YOU COME ON BACK DOWN HERE AND
CRACK SOME MORE WALNUTS FOR ME."
Submitter comment:
I COULD NEVER GET THE EFFECT WRITING AS MR.
HAMMETT DOES TELLING.
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-20-1985
BLACK-AMERICAN JOKE
ONCE TWO FRIENDS WERE WALKING DOWN
MAIN STREET IN NATCHEZ, MISSIPPI.
ONE OF THE MEN STUTTERED VERY BADLY.
THE STUTTERER LOOKED UP AND SUDDENLY
CRIED OUT "MA MA MA MA MA MA MA MAN
DID U U U U U U U U YOU SEE SEE SEE
THAT GIR GIR GIR GIR GIR GIRL WI WI
WI WI WI WITH THEM PUR PUR PUR PUR
PURTY LEGS?" HIS FRIEND REPLIED,
"WHAR?" THE STUTTERER SAID, "OH, OH
OH, OH, HER GONE NOW." THEY PROCEEDED
WALKING WHEN THE STUTTERER NOTICED
ANOTHER PRETTY GIRL AND WENT THROUGH
THE SAME LONG QUESTION TO HIS FRIEND;
HOWEVER, BY THE TIME HE GOT IT OUT,
HIS FRIEND HAD MISSED SEEING THE
PRETTY GIRL AGAIN. AS THEY CONTINUED
THEIR WALK, THE STUTTERER CRIED OUT
AGAIN, "MA MA MA MA MA MAN, DI DI DI
DI DID YOU," AND BEFORE HE COULD GET
FINISHED WITH HIS QUESTION, HIS FRUSTRATED
FRIEND CRIED OUT, "MAN, I SEED IT, I
SEED IT." THE STUTTERER THEN REPLIED,
"WELL IF YOU SEED IT, WHATCHA GO AND
STEP IN IT FOR?".
Submitter comment:
MANNERISMS, ACCENT AND JESTURES OF THIS
PERSON IS AUTHENTIC.
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-20-1985
BLACK AMERICAN
ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A FRENCHMAN
NAMED HAROLD BENOIT. HE STEPPED OFF
THE BUS IN NATCHEZ, MISSISSIPPI, AND
WAS CONFRONTED BY A GENTLEMAN WITH A
GUN IN HIS HAND, WHO ASKED, "ARE YOU
HAROLD BENOIT?" THE FRENCHMAN REPLIED,
I SUSPECT YOU'RE RIGHT. THE MAN THEN
ASKED, " YOU EVER BEEN TO PITTSBURGH?"
MR. BENOIT CHECKED HIS LITTLE BLACK
BOOK UNDER P'S, AND REPLIED, YES, I'VE
VISITED PITTSBURGH. THE MAN THEN ASKED,
"WELL, DIDJA EVER KNOW OR MEET A LADY
MORRIS?" BENOIT CHECKED HIS BOOK UNDER
A'S FOR ACQUAINTANCES, AND RESPONDED,
YES, I KNEW A LADY MORRIS. THE MAN
THEN ASKED, "DIDJA EVER HAVE AN AFFAIR
WITH LADY MORRIS?" BENOIT CHECKED HIS
BOOK UNDER F FOR AFFAIRS AND RESPONDED,
YES, I SURELY DID HAVE AN AFFAIR WITH
LADY MORRIS. THE MAN THEN REPLIED
ANGRILY, "WELL I'M SIR MORRIS AND I
DON'T LIKE THAT ONE BIT." BENOIT
THEN LOOKED IN HIS BLACK BOOK UNDER
O'S FOR OPINIONS AND RESPONDED, "I
DON'T BLAME YOU SIR, I DIDN'T LIKE
IT EITHER."
Submitter comment: HILARIOUS
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI
Keyword(s): JOKE
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-20-1985
BLACK-AMERICAN JOKE
WHEN I WAS A YOUNG BOY, BLACK PEOPLE
WEREN'T USED TO CARS WITH AIR CON-
DITIONING. ONE DAY OLD NATHAN WAS
WALKING DOWN THE ROAD AND MR. NETTERVILLE
DROVE ALONG AND ASKED NATHAN IF HE WANTED
A RIDE. NATHAN ACCEPTED AND GOT IN THE
AIR-CONDITIONED CAR. MR. NETTERVILLE
AFTER ABOUT TEN MINUTES ASKED NATHAN WHERE
HE WAS GOING. NATHAN RESPONDED, "I WAS
ON MY WAY TO THE LOW 40'S TO DO SOME PLOWING,
BUT SINCE THE WEATHER HAS CHANGED, YOU CAN
LET ME OUT SO I CAN GO BACK HOME AND KILL
A HAWG."
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-20-1985
BLACK-AMERICAN JOKE
I WAS ON MY WAY DOWN IN LOUISIANA ONE DAY
TO DO SOME HUNTING. A MAN GOT ON THE BUS
WITH WHAT HE CLAIMED WAS THE BEST HUNTING
DOG IN THE WORLD. THE OTHER HUNTERS
CHALLENGED HIM TO PROVE IT. THEY ARRIVED
AT THE HUNTING GROUNDS AND THE DOG HIT THE
TRAIL YELPING AWAY. HE STRUCK A TRAIL
IMMEDIATELY THAT RUN HIM ABOUT TWO MILES,
WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, HE STOPPED AND WAS
SEEN TIP-TOEING VERY QUIETLY FOR ANOTHER
TWO MILES. SUDDENLY THE DOG BEGAN TO
BARK AND YELP WHOLEHEARTEDLY. THE MEN
CURIOUSLY ASKED, "WHY WAS HE QUIET BACK
YONDER IN THAT STRETCH?" THE OWNER
REPLIED, "DIDN'T CHA SEE THAT NO POSTED
SIGN OVER THAR?"
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-20-1985
BLACK-AMERICAN JOKE
ONCE AT A HUNTING CAMP A MAN WAS BRAGGING
ABOUT HIS PRIME SQUIRREL DOG AND HOW
TERRIBLY GOOD HE WAS. OF COURSE HE HAD
TO SHOW PROOF, SO HE TOOK THE DOG OUT
AND THE DOG IMMEDIATELY STRUCK A TRAIL.
WHEN THE MEN CAUGHT UP WITH THE DOG,
HE WAS LYING ON THE GROUND WITH TWO
FOOTS UP IN THE AIR. THEY ASKED WHY;
THE OWNER EXPLAINED THAT HE HAD TREED
TWO SQUIRRELS. THE MEN EXCLAIMED HOW
GOOD THAT WAS. THE DOG THEN STRUCK
ANOTHER TRAIL AND THEY FOUND HIM THIS
TIME LYING ON THE GROUND WITH FOUR
FOOTS IN THE AIR. OF COURSE THIS
TIME HE HAD TREED FOUR SQUIRRELS. THE
MEN MARVELED AT HIS COMPETENCY. THEN
BLUE BROKE AWAY AGAIN AND WHEN THE
HUNTERS CAUGHT UP WITH HIM, HE WAS LYING
ON THE GROUND WITH FOUR FOOTS IN THE AIR
AND HIS TAIL IN HIS BEHIND. THE HUNTERS
ASKED THE OWNER WHAT BLUE WAS DOING THIS
TIME. THE HUNTER SAID THAT BLUE WAS
SAYING THAT THERE WERE FOUR SQUIRRELS IN
THE TREE, BUT THEY SCREWED AROUND COMING
ACROSS THE HOLLER SO LONG THAT THE SQUIRRELS
WENT IN THE HOLE.
Where learned: MISSISSIPPI
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 09-20-1985
ONE NIGHT MY WIFE AND I WERE INVITED TO GO TO AN ENGAGEMENT
PARTY. MY WIFE SAID, "I'M NOT GOING UNLESS I BRING HIS WIFE
SOMETHING."
WE WENT TO THE GROSSE POINTE FLORIST TO BUY A GIFT. I SAID,
"LOOK, I FOUND A PLANT."
"HOW MUCH," SHE ASKED.
I SAID, "THIRTY FIVE DOLLARS."
"THAT'S TOO EXPENSIVE," SHE SAID. "HERE'S ONE FOR TWENTY
DOLLARS."
JUST AS SHE SAID THAT, THE PLANT SLIPPED FROM HER HANDS
AND FELL ONTO OTHER FLOWER ARRANGEMENTS. WE HAD TO PAY
FIFTY-TWO DOLLARS WORTH OF DAMAGE. THE MORAL OF THE STORY
IS: WE SHOULD HAVE PAID THE THIRTY-FIVE DOLLARS, IT WOULD
HAVE BEEN LESS EXPENSIVE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; SAINT CLAIR SHORES
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1980
HELEN'S GARNDMOTHER WENT TO A LITTLE COUNTRY TOWN TO VISIT
RELATIVES. THE GRANDMOTHER AND GRANDFATHER WENT TO CHURCH
IN THAT LITTLE TOWN ON SUNDAY. RIGHT BEFORE THE SERVICE
THE PEOPLE FOUND THAT HELEN'S GRANDMOTHER WAS AN ORGANIST.
SHE WAS ASKED TO PLAY THE ORGAN FOR THE SERVICE. SHE WENT
UP TO THE ORGAN AND THE PREACHER TOLD THE CONGREGATION
THAT THEY WOULD NOW SING A HYMN. THE CONGREGATION SAT THERE
QUIETLY, THE PREACHER STOOD THERE QUIETLY, AND HELEN'S
GRANDMOTHER SAT THERE QUIETLY. THE PREACHER DIDN'T
ANNOUNCE THE HYMN TITLE OR NUMBER. FINALLY, HELEN'S
GRANDMOTHER STARTED A FAMILIAR HYMN, AND EVERYONE STARTED TO
SING.
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1920
RAY WAS EATING AT AN OUTDOOR SIDEWALK CAFE. A BIRD FLEW
ONTO RAY'S HEAD. HE REACHED UP AND FELT A FURRY LITTLE THING.
HE REACHED UP HIS HAND AND SWIPED THE BIRD OFF, AND
IT LANDED ON THE TABLE OF AN AUSTRALIAN COUPLE.
Where learned: ITALY ; FLORENCE
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 07-00-1985
Entry filtered.