Dr. James T. Callow publications
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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive
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DIVORCE JOKE
MY WIFE'S COFFEE IS GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE.
Submitter comment:
I'VE HEARD THIS ON THE JOHNNY CARSON SHOW IN CALIFORNIA,
HEARD IT AT THE PLACE WHERE I WORK, AND PLACES WHERE
THERE ARE LOTS OF DIVORCES AND SEPARATIONS; IT'S SUPPOSED
TO BE FUNNY.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; FRANKLIN VILLAGE
James Callow Keyword(s): PUN ON COFFEE GROUNDS
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 07-00-1983
"M'AN COCO POTE D'ENFER" IS A WOMAN WHO LIVES IN AN UNDERWATER
CAVE, AND IT IS BELIEVED THAT SHE ATTACKS FISHERMEN AND DIVERS.
Submitter comment:
SOME PEOPLE SAID THAT THEY HAVE BEEN IN HER UNDERWATER CAVE, AND
WHAT THEY SAW WAS A HUGE TABLE FULL OF DISHES.
Where learned: GUADELOUPE
Keyword(s): "M'AN COCO" MEANS "MADAME COCO". "POTE D'ENFER" MEANS "HELL'S GATE" ; SUPPOSELY THAT IS WHERE SHE LIVES. ; WHICH IS THE NAME OF THE NORTHERN EXTREMITY OF GUADELOUPE, AND
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Supernatural Being |
Date learned: 00-00-1966
IF SOMETHING IS STOLEN, AND THERE ARE MANY SUSPECTS, YOU CAN KNOW
THE REAL PERSON THAT STOLE THE ITEM BY DOING THIS SIMPLE TEST.
OPEN THE BIBLE TO JOB CHAPTER SEVENTEEN, PLACE A KEY IN THAT
SECTION, AND USE A ROPE TO TIE THE KEY AND THE BIBLE TOGETHER.
LET EACH OF THE SUSPECT SWEAR SAYING THUS, "IF I TAKE THE LOST ITEM
LET ME BE MENTALLY SICK IMMEDIATELY". IF THE PERSON WHO STOLE THE
ITEM SAYS THIS, HE WILL BECOME MENTALLY SICK WITH IMMEDIATE
EFFECT.
Submitter comment: THE INFORMANT LOOKED SERIOUS WHILE NARRATING THE ITEM.
Where learned: NIGERIA ; LAGOS
James Callow Keyword(s): DETECTION OF THIEF ; THEFT
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Curse BELIEF -- Means of Causing or Avoiding Illness BELIEF -- Use of Object |
Date learned: 02-00-1967
LIMERICK ON A FAMILY TRIP
THERE ONCE WAS A GIRL NAMED CHER,
WHO WAS ALWAYS BRUSHING HER HAIR.
ONE DAY PEOPLE SAY
HER HAIR BLEW AWAY.
AND NOW POOR CHER'S HEAD IS BARE.
Submitter comment:
THIS IS A POEM THAT MY SISTER MADE UP WHILE WE WERE PLAYING
A GAME IN THE CAR ON A FAMILY TRIP. THE GAME CONSISTS
OF EVERYBODY MAKING UP A FIVE-LINE POEM WITH A PERSON'S
NAME IN IT. AT THE END THE PERSON WITH THE BEST LIMERICK
GETS A PRIZE OF SOME SORT. USUALLY THE PRIZE TURNED OUT TO
BE A MILKSHAKE AT MCDONALD'S RESTAURANT.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DEARBORN HEIGHTS
James Callow Keyword(s): IMPROMPTU COMPOSITION OF POETRY
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Wit Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
LIMERICK ON A FAMILY TRIP
THERE ONCE WAS A GIRL NAMED JULIE.
HER HAIR WAS TANGLED AND UNRULY.
HER MOM HAD IT SHORN.
HOW JULIE DID MOURN.
FOR THE MICE HAD NO HOME WITHOUT JULIE.
Submitter comment:
THIS WAS A LIMERICK MADE UP IN THE GAME PLAYED ON A
FAMILY TRIP.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DEARBORN HEIGHTS
James Callow Keyword(s): IMPROMPTU OF POETRY
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Wit Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
LIMERICK ON A FAMILY TRIP
THERE ONCE WAS A BOY NAMED BILL
WHO SWALLOWED AN ATOMIC PILL.
HE STARTED TO COUGH.
THE BOMB WENT OFF.
THEY FOUND HIS HEAD IN BRAZIL.
THERE WAS ALSO A GIRL NAMED JANE
WHO ALWAYS HAD A VERY STRANGE PAIN.
SHE TOOK ONE OF BILL'S PILLS
NEVER KNOWING IT KILLS,
AND WAS NEVER HEARD FROM AGAIN.
SO DON'T FOOL AROUND WITH A PILL,
UNLESS YOU ARE MENTALLY ILL.
FOR THE PILL THAT YOU TAKE
COULD BE THE MISTAKE
OF ENDING YOUR LIFE WITHOUT WILL.
Submitter comment:
THIS LIMERICK WAS MADE UP IN A GAME PLAYED IN THE CAR ON
A FAMILY TRIP.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DEARBORN HEIGHTS
James Callow Keyword(s): IMPROMPTU OF POETRY
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Wit Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse |
Date learned: 00-00-1980
JOKE
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE GIRL WHO WENT TO THE BEACH AND BAKED
HERSELF UNDER THE HOT SUN FOR SIX HOURS? SHE WANTED TO BE
THE TOAST OF THE TOWN.
James Callow Keyword(s): TOAST OF THE TOWN: CELEBRITY
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Jest Anecdote |
Date learned: 00-00-1983
JOKE
OLD REFRIGERATORS NEVER DIE, THEY JUST LOSE THEIR COOL.
James Callow comment: TO "LOSE YOUR COOL" IS SLANG FOR LOSE YOUR APLOMB OR COMPOSURE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PARODY OF PROVERB
| Subject headings: | PROVERB -- Proverbial Metaphor PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim |
Date learned: 00-00-1984
I HEARD THE STORY FROM SOMEWHERE, I DON'T RECALL WHERE, ABOUT
THE GIRL WHO WAS RUN OVER BY A TRUCK ON THE STREET CALLED
STRASBURG IN DETROIT. NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES THAT STREET
HAS BEEN RESURFACED YOU CAN STILL HEAR THE GIRL POUNDING
UNDERNEATH YOUR CAR AS YOU DRIVE DOWN THAT STREET BECAUSE
WHEN SHE WAS RUN OVER SHE WAS TRAPPED BENEATH THE TRUCK AND
WITNESSES SAW HER POUNDING AND SCREAMING UNDERNEATH THE TRUCK
AS THE TRUCK DRAGGED HER DOWN THE STREET.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): GHOSTLY SOUNDS FROM SCENE OF ACCIDENT
James Callow Keyword(s): KNOCK-KNOCK STREET
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Ghost Spirit Phantom Specter BELIEF -- Product or activity of man or animal |
"O'LEARY'S BAR"
'TWAS A COLD WINTER'S EVENING.
THE GUESTS WERE ALL LEAVING.
O'LEARY WAS CLOSING THE BAR,
WHEN HE TURNED AND HE SAID TO THE LADY IN RED,
"GET OUT! YOU CAN'T STAY HERE NO MORE."
SHE WEPT A SAD TEAR IN HER BUCKET OF BEER
AS SHE THOUGHT OF THE COLD NIGHT AHEAD,
WHEN A GENTLEMAN DAPPER STEPPED OUT OF THE PHONE BOOTH
AND THESE ARE THE WORDS THAT HE SAID:
"YOUR MOTHER NEVER TOLD YOU
THE THINGS A YOUNG GIRL SHOULD KNOW
ABOUT THE WAYS OF COLLEGE MEN AND HOW THEY COME AND GO--
MOSTLY GO!!!!!"
NOW AGE HAS TAKEN HER BEAUTY
AND SIN HAS LEFT ITS SAD SCAR.
SO, REMEMBER YOUR MOTHERS AND SISTERS, BOYS,
AND LET HER SLEEP UNDER THE BAR
NEXT TO THE GIN,
WITH HIRAM WALKER,
IN SOUTHERN COMFORT.
AND THERE WAS GRANNY SWINGING ON THE OUTHOUSE DOOR
WITHOUT HER NIGHTIE
AND GRANDPA YELLING, "MORE, MORE, MORE!"
SHE WORE PAJAMAS.
Submitter comment:
WHEN THIS IS SUNG BY MEMBERS OF KAPPA BETA GAMMA SORORITY, THE
PARTS OF THE "LADY IN RED" AND THE "GENTLEMAN DAPPER" ARE
ACTED OUT.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PUN ON BRAND NAMES OF ALCOHOLIC DRINKS
| Subject headings: | Shadow / Pantomime Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ballad, Song, Verse Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Social reunion |
Date learned: 09-00-1985
WHEN WE DRINK, WE GET DRUNK.
WHEN WE GET DRUNK, WE GO TO SLEEP.
WHEN WE GO TO SLEEP, WE COMMIT NO SIN.#
WHEN WE COMMIT NO SIN, WE GO TO HEAVEN
SO LET'S ALL GET DRUNK AND GO TO HEAVEN.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): CHAIN OF REASONING ; HUMOR ; SYLLOGISM
| Subject headings: | PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim |
IN AFGHANISTAN, THE VARIOUS MOUNTAIN TRIBES PLAY A
POPULAR GAME. THE GAME GOES LIKE THIS.
THE MEN OF THE TRIBE, MOUNTED ON HORSEBACK, ARE EQUIPPED
WITH POLES THAT HAVE A LONG BLADE ON THE END. WHILE ON
HORSEBACK, THEY MUST KILL A YOUNG CALF WITH THEIR POLES
AND CUT OFF THE HEAD. THEN THEY MUST ROLL THE HEAD OF THE
CALF FROM ONE END OF THE FIELD TO THE OTHER, AND THEN
BACK AGAIN TO WHERE THEY STARTED. THE ONE IN POSSESSION
OF THE HEAD AT THIS POINT WINS THE GAME.
Submitter comment:
SINCE THE SOVIET INVASION OF AFGHANISTAN, THE AFGHANIS
NOW USE CAPTURED SOVIET POW'S FOR THIS GAME INSTEAD OF
THEIR CATTLE, WHICH THEY FEEL THAT THEY MUST CONSERVE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): BEHEADING ; SEVERED HEAD OF HUMAN USED AS BALL ; WAR PRISONERS
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Special Object or Implement CUSTOM FESTIVAL -- War |
Date learned: 08-00-1987
WHY DID THE BLACK MAN WEAR A TUXEDO TO HIS VASECTOMY?
ANSWER. IF I'M GONNA BE IMPOTENT I MIGHT AS WELL LOOK
IMPOTENT.
Submitter comment:
I GOT THIS JOKE FROM THE MOVIE "SOUL MAN." IT WAS TOLD
BY TWO WHITE GUYS IN FRONT OF A BLACK GUY TO MAKE HIM
FEEL BAD.
Where learned: HOME ; MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): IMPOTENT- USED INSTEAD OF THE WORD IMPORTANT TO MAKE ; THE BLACK MAN'S SPEECH SEEM BAD.
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- BLAC |
Date learned: 10-00-1987
JAIN BUDDHISTS DON'T EAT MEALS AFTER SUNSET FOR FEAR THAT THEY
WILL EAT GERMS AND SIN.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; SOUTHFIELD
Keyword(s): JAIN IS A CLASS OF BUDDHISTS
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Measure of time Eating For menu, see N222. |
Date learned: 00-00-1967
Some people say that a man of dark color is crazy about a
high yellow, but high yellow will throw you, and when
you come home, there will be another mule kicking in your
stall. A brown skin girl is the best gal after all.
Where learned: VIRGINIA
James Callow Keyword(s): African-American color of skin
| Subject headings: | BELIEF -- Body part Senses BELIEF -- Color SPEECH -- Formula |
Date learned: 00-00-1939
IT'S NOT THE COUGH THAT CARRIES YOU OFF;
IT'S THE COFFIN THEY CARRY YOU OFF IN.
Submitter comment:
TOLD TO THE INFORMANT BY HER FATHER, WHENEVER SHE HAD
A BAD COLD.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
Keyword(s): VIRUS
James Callow Keyword(s): HUMOR ; PUN ON COUGHING, COFFIN
| Subject headings: | PROVERB -- Proverbial Apothegm Maxim |
326 Youth Who Wanted to Learn What Fear Is
There once was a little girl that claimed she was very
brave, and wasn't afraid of anything. So one day her
brothers dared her to go to the grave yard to steal a
tombstone and bring it back to show them. The little girl
did indeed go to the graveyard to get that tombstone but
never returned. What everyone says that happened was that as
she was putting her dress over the stone to carry it out the
stone fell on her dress and pulled her down. Of course the
little girl thought that the spirit of the grave was tugging
on her dress, and she was so scared that she died right there
on the spot.
Where learned: IOWA ; Des Moines
James Callow Keyword(s): dying of fright ; FEAR TEST
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Magic |
Date learned: 00-00-1910