The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

THE RETARD

FAR AWAY, CLOSE TO A FOREST, LIVED A POOR WIDOW WITH A
RETARDED SON. SHE MADE A LIVING FROM A FEW ACRES SHE
OWNED. SHE HAD ONE COW FOR MILK, SOME SHEEP, CHICKENS,
AND GEESE.
ONE DAY, SHE WAS VERY ILL AND HAD NO ONE TO HELP HER,
SO SHE DECIDED TO SELL HER COW TO PAY FOR HER DOCTOR
BILL.
SHE CALLED HER SON AND TOLD HIM TO TAKE THE COW TO THE
MARKET AND NOT TO SELL IT TO ANYONE WHO WOULD TALK
MUCH, BUT SELL IT ONLY TO THE PERSON WHO WOULD PAY THE
BEST. THE RETARDED SON TOOK THE COW AND WAS STANDING
AT THE MARKET. MANY PEOPLE ASKED HOW MUCH HE WANTED,
BUT HE WOULDN'T TELL THEM, BECAUSE THEY WERE TALKING.
HE TOOK THE COW BACK ON THE ROAD AND STARTED TO WALK
HOME. BY THE SIDE OF THE ROAD STOOD A STATUE OF ST.
ANTHONY. THE RETARD YELLED TO THE STATUE IF HE WOULD
BE INTERESTING IN BUYING THE COW.
THE STATUE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING, SO HE TOOK A STICK
AND BEAT IT TILL THE STATUE FELL APART. WHEN IT FELL
APART, THERE WERE TWO BAGS OF MONEY INSIDE. ONE OF
SILVER AND ONE OF GOLD. HE TIED THE COW TO A LITTLE
FENCE AND STARTED TO SORT THE MONEY.
MEANWHILE, A NEIGHBORING RANCHER WAS GOING BY. HE
STOPPED AND ASKED THE RETARD WHAT HE WAS DOING.
THE RETARD SAID THAT HE WAS SORTING THE MONEY. THE
RANCHER ASKED THE RETARD IF HE TOO COULD HAVE SOME OF
THE MONEY. THEN HE WAS TOLD THAT HE COULD HAVE ALL THE
SILVER MONEY. HE STARTED PICKING UP THE SILVER, BUT
WAS TAKING SOME OF THE GOLD, WHEN THE RETARD DISCOVERED
HIM. THE RETARD LOST HIS TEMPER AND STARTED HITTING
THE RANCHER UNTIL HE HAD KILLED HIM.
THE RETARD THEN TOOK THE MONEY TO HIS MOTHER. WHEN
THE MOTHER ASKED IF HE HAD SOLD THE COW, HE TOLD HER
HE HAD AND ALSO THAT HE HAD KILLED THE RANCHER. THE
POOR WOMAN GOT UP FROM THE BED AND TOOK HER SON TO
BURY THE RANCHER.
LATER, SHE THOUGHT ABOUT IT, AND DECIDED THAT HER SON
WOULD TALK ABOUT KILLING THE RANCHER. SHE DECIDED TO
KILL ONE OF HER RAMS AND SHE BURIED IT IN THE PLACE OF
THE RANCHER AND MOVED THE RANCHER'S BODY TO ANOTHER
PLACE.
THE NEXT MORNING THE NEWS SPREAD AROUND THAT THE
RANCHER'S HORSES CAME BACK WITHOUT HIM. EVERYONE WAS
TALKING ABOUT THE RANCHER WHO HAD DISAPPEARED.
THE RETARD TOLD THE PEOPLE HE HAD KILLED THE RANCHER
AND THEY REPORTED IT TO THE POLICE. THE POLICE CAME
AND PLACED HIM UNDER ARREST AND TOOK HIM TO THE AREA
OF THE CRIME AND TOLD HIM TO DIG FOR THE RANCHER'S
BODY. THE RETARD STARTED TO DIG AND HE FIRST UNCOVERED
THE RAMS HORNS. HE LOOKED TO THE POLICEMEN AND ALL
THE NEIGHBORS STANDING BY AND ASKED, "DID YOUR RANCHER
HAVE HORNS?"
THE QUESTION WAS VERY SILLY AND EVERYONE LEFT THE RETARD.
HE CAME HOME AND ENJOYED THE MONEY WHICH HE TOOK FROM
THE STATUE. ROBBERS HAD HIDDEN IT THERE AND THOUGHT
THAT NO ONE WOULD FIND IT.

Where learned: POLAND

Date learned: 00-00-1935