The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

TWELVE BOTTLES OF WHISKEY

I HAD TWELVE BOTTLES OF WHISKEY IN MY CELLAR AND MY WIFE
TOLD ME TO EMPTY THE CONTENTS OF EACH AND EVERY BOTTLE
DOWN THE SINK OR ELSE! SO I SAID I WOULD AND PROCEEDED
WITH THE UNPLEASANT TASK. I WITHDREW THE CORK FROM
THE FIRST BOTTLE AND POURED THE CONTENTS DOWN THE SINK,
WITH THE EXCEPTION OF ONE GLASS, WHICH I DRANK. I
EXTRACTED THE CORK FROM THE SECOND AND DID LIKEWISE WITH
THE EXCEPTION OF ONE GLASS, WHICH I DRANK. I THEN
WITHDREW THE CORK FROM THE THIRD BOTTLE AND POURED THE
WHISKEY DOWN THE SINK WITH THE EXCEPTION OF ONE GLASS,
WHICH I DRANK. I PULLED THE CORK FROM THE FOURTH
SINK AND POURED THE BOTTLE DOWN THE GLASS, WHICH I
DRANK.
I PULLED THE BOTTLE FROM THE CORK OF THE NEXT AND
DRANK ONE SINK OUT OF IT, AND THREW THE REST DOWN THE
GLASS. I PULLED THE SINK OUT OF THE NEXT GLASS AND POURED
THE CORK FROM THE BOTTLE. THEN I CORKED THE SINK WITH
THE GLASS, BOTTLED THE DRINK AND DRANK THE POUR.
WHEN I HAD EVERYTHING EMPTIED, I STEADIED THE HOUSE WITH
ONE HAND, COUNTED THE BOTTLES, CORKS, GLASSES AND SINKS
WITH THE OTHER, WHICH WERE TWENTY-NINE AND AS THE HOUSE
CAME BY, I COUNTED THEM AGAIN AND FINALLY HAD ALL THE
HOUSES AND BOTTLES AND CORKS AND GLASSES AND SINKS
COUNTED, EXCEPT ONE HOUSE AND ONE BOTTLE, WHICH I DRANK.

Submitter comment: TELLER GETS INCREASINGLY DRUNK AND INCREASINGLY ILLOGICAL AS
HE PROCEEDS WITH THE TALE.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT

Date learned: 11-19-1970