The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

"O'LEARY'S BAR"

TWAS A COLD WINTER'S EVENING THE GUESTS WERE ALL LEAVING,
O'LEARY WAS CLOSING THE BAR.
WHEN HE TURNED AND HE SAID TO THE LADY IN RED
"GET OUT YOU CAN'T STAY ANYMORE."
SHE WEPT A SAD TEAR IN HER BUCKET OF BEER
AS SHE THOUGHT OF THE COLD NIGHT AHEAD.
WHEN A DAPPER PHI KAPPER STEPPED OUT OF THE CRAPPER
AND THESE ARE THE WORDS THAT HE SAID,
HER MOTHER NEVER TOLD HER THE THINGS A YOUNG GIRL SHOULD KNOW
ABOUT THE WAYS OF COLLEGE MEN AND HOW THEY COME AND GO--
MOSTLY GO--
NOW AGE HAS TAKEN HER BEAUTY AND SIN HAS LEFT ITS SAD SCAR
SO REMEMBER YOUR MOTHERS BOYS AND LET HER SLEEP UNDER THE BAR.
NEXT TO THE GIN. IN WHAT?
IN SOUTHERN COMFORT. WITH WHO?
WITH HIRAM WALKER.
AND THERE WAS GRANNY SWINGIN' ON THE OUTHOUSE DOOR,
WITHOUT HER NIGHTY, AND GRAMPS WAS YELLING MORE, MORE, MORE.
SHE WORE PAJAMAS.

Submitter comment: THERE ARE MANY RUN-ON SENTENCES BECAUSE THE PIECE IS MEANT
TO BE SUNG.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT