The James T. Callow Folklore Archive

A CANNIBAL STORY

A MAN DECIDED THAT HE WANTED TO GO ON A SAFARI
IN DEEPEST AFRICA. HE AND HIS ENTIRE PARTY WERE
CAPTURED BY CANNIBALS ON THE FIRST DAY OUT. SINCE
HE WAS THE ONLY WHITE MAN, THE NATIVES DECIDED TO COOK
HIM FIRST. THEY PUT HIM IN A LARGE POT OF WATER.
THE CHIEF CAME OVER WITH A BIG KNIFE AND CUT OFF HIS
EAR. THE MAN WAS NOT GOING TO LET THEM KNOW HE WAS
IN PAIN, SO HE DIDN'T MAKE A SOUND. THE CHIEF ATE THE
EAR AND WASHED IT DOWN WITH A VERNOR'S GINGERALE.
HE CAME BACK AND REMOVED AN ARM, THE NATIVES DEVOURED
IT AND, AGAIN, IT WAS WASHED DOWN WITH A VERNOR'S
GINGERALE.
WHEN THE CHIEF RETURNED A THIRD TIME, THE MAN FINALLY
SAID SOMETHING. "I SUPPOSE THIS TIME YOU'RE GOING
TO CUT OFF MY THING AND WASH IT DOWN WITH VERNOR'S."
THE CHIEF SAID, "UH-UH. EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT THINGS
GO BETTER WITH COKE."

Submitter comment: LYNN HEARD THIS STORY FROM SOME FRIENDS AT
UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN.

Data entry tech comment: ALLUSION TO TELEVISION COMMERCIAL FOR COCA-COLA.

Where learned: MICHIGAN ; UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT ; DETROIT

Date learned: 00-00-1967