Dr. James T. Callow publications
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The James T. Callow Folklore Archive
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ROCK AROUND THE CROSS
ONE AND TWO, THREE AND FOUR,
PILATE SAID "NO" BUT WE YELLED FOR MORE
REFRAIN:
WE'RE GONNA ROCK AROUND THE CROSS TONIGHT
ROCK, ROCK, ROCK, UNTIL THE BROAD DAYLIGHT
WE'RE GONNA ROCK, GONNA ROCK, GONNA ROCK AROUND THE CROSS TONIGHT.
FOUR AND FIVE, SIX AND SEVEN
WE'RE ALL GOING TO HELL CAUSE THERE AIN'T NO HEAVEN
REFRAIN:
SEVEN AND EIGHT, NINE AND TEN
WE'RE GONNA TEAR CHRIST DOWN AND HANG HIM UP AGAIN.
REFRAIN:
Submitter comment:
SUNG TO THE TUNE OF: "ROCK AROUND THE CLOCK".
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1967
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OI, OI, OI
CHORUS:
OI, OI OI, OI
DELTA SIGMA PHOI-OI
LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE
TO MY LITTLE BABY BOY-OI-YA-OI,OI
DELTA SIGMA PHOI-OI
HEY, SEND MY BOY TO COLLEGE TO
LEARN TO READ AND WRITE
AND NOW HE'S DATING CHRISTIAN
GIRLS ON YOM KIPPER NIGHT.
CHORUS
HEY, SEND MY BOY TO COLLEGE TO
LEARN TO READ AND SPELL
AND NOW HE THINKS THAT RASH HASHAN
IS A COLLEGE YELL.
CHORUS
HEY, IF YOU'VE GOT A GIRL THAT'S ABLE
AND, YOU NEED A KITCHEN TABLE
I CAN GET IT FOR YOU WHOLESALE
CHORUS
HEY, IF YOU'VE GOT A GIRL THAT'S NIFTY
ONLY $37.50
I CAN GET IT FOR YOU WHOLESALE
CHORUS
HEY, IF YOU'RE CONTEMPLATING MARRIAGE
AND YOU NEED A BABY CARRIAGE
I CAN GET IT FOR YOU WHOLESALE
CHORUS
HEY, THIS IS A FRATERNITY
THAT GUARANTEES MATERNITY
I CAN GET IT FOR YOU WHOLESALE.
CHORUS
Submitter comment:
I LEARNED THIS SONG ALONG WITH MANY OTHERS, FROM DELTA SIGMA PHI
PARTIES WHICH I HAVE ATTENDED SINCE FALL OF 1962. AT EVERY PARTY
WE GATHER AROUND AND SING THESE SONGS.
Data entry tech comment:
Informant and collector are the same person.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT ; DELTA SIGMA PHI FRATERNITY HOUSE
Keyword(s): SATIRE OF JEWS
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Emotion Filter - Mature Content |
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THREE IRISHMEN
THREE IRISHMEN, THREE IRISHMEN
SITTIN IN A DITCH.
ONE CALLED THE OTHER A DIRTY SON OF A BEAVER
A BEAVER SITTIN ON A LOG
ALONG CAME A BUMBLE BEE AND STUNG HIM ON THE COCK_TALE
GINGER ALE, FIVE CENTS A GLASS
IF YOU DON,T LIKE IT SHOVE IT UP YOUR
ASK ME NO MORE QUESTIONS FOR I WILL TELL NO LIES.
IF YOU GET HIT WITH A BUCKET OF SHIT,
BE SURE TO CLOSE YOUR EYES.
Data entry tech comment:
Updated by TRD
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; BATTLE CREEK
Keyword(s): Irish ; Lyrics ; MUSIC ; RHYME ; SONG ; Tune
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1959
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IN 1944 MY FATHER WENT TO WAR
IN 1944
MY FATHER WENT TO WAR.
HE PULLED THAT TRIGGER,
AND SHOT THAT NIGGER.
IN 1944.
Submitter comment: SHE IS TELLING WHAT HER FATHER DID IN THE WAR.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ballad, Song, Verse Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 11-04-1977
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I FOUND IT IN THE NAVY
I LOST MY DICK IN THE ARMY,
I FOUND IT IN THE NAVY,
I POPPED IT UP A LADY,
AND POP GOES THE BABY.
(YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT IN SCHOOL.)
Submitter comment:
K.W. SLANG: DICK FOR PENIS.
THIS IS THE TYPE OF ENVIROMENT MY INFORMANT WAS IN
DURING HER CHILDHOOD.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Ballad, Song, Verse Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 11-04-1977
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SONG
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
I'M CRACK'IN UP FROM A LACK OF SHACK'IN UP. I'M GOIN' MAD FROM
THE LACK OF BEING HAD, AND I COME FROM THE ISLAND OF
COME-ON-I-WANNA-LAY-YA, WON'T SOMEONE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME.
I WANNA GET LAID, I WANNA GET PAID, WON'T SOMEONE
TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME, PLEASE-PLEASE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): SEX
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Good humor Jest Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1974
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COUNTING OUT RHYME
EENIE MEENIE MINIE MOE CATCH A NIGGER BY THE TOE IF HE HOLLERS
LET HIM GO, EENIE MEENIE MINIE MOE.
Submitter comment:
THE CHILDREN SIT IN A CIRCLE AND THE CALLER TOUCHES ONE FOOT
FOR EACH WORD HE SAYS. THE LAST PERSON TOUCHED WITHDRAWS HIS
FOOT. THIS CONTINUES UNTIL ONLY ONE PERSON IS LEFT. HE THEN IS IT.
Data entry tech comment:
Updated on 09.10.12
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; MILFORD
Keyword(s): Rhyme, Game, Slur,
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Game Verse Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Game Verse Game Verse Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1979
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WHEN YOU GROW OLD AND YOUR BALLS GROW COLD AND THE HEAD OF YOUR
DICK TURNS BLUE, AND WHEN YOU TRY TO DIDDLE AND IT BENDS IN THE
MIDDLE, THEN YOU KNOW GODDAMIT YOU,RE THROUGH.
Submitter comment:
THIS LITTLE SAYING WAS TOLD TO ME BY A MAN WHO HAD LIVED FOR
MANY YEARS IN THE THUMB AREA. HE HAD HEARD THIS WHEN HE WORKED FOR
A LUMBER COMPANY IN THAT AREA.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; SOUTHFIELD
James Callow Keyword(s): AGING ; SLANG: DICK FOR PENIS
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Lyrical Verse Lyrical Verse Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1977
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VERSE
KEEP YOUR ZIPPER UP
AND YOUR HAMMER DOWN,
AND WHEN YOU GET HOME,
YOU CAN TURN THEM AROUND.
Submitter comment:
I HEARD THIS VERSE RECITED BY A TRUCKER IN A CONVERSATION WITH SOME
OTHER TRUCKERS ON A CB RADIO. I TOOK IT TO BE ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING
HE WANTED TO HURRY UP AND GET HOME TO MAKE LOVE TO HIS WIFE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT ; CAR
James Callow Keyword(s): ADVICE
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Verse without Music Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1978
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BULLSHIT
"I THE PRINCE OF WALES SAY HORSESHIT"
"BULLSHIT"
"WHO SHIT?"
"RABBITSHIT"
"BULLSHIT"
"WHO SHIT?"
Submitter comment:
IN THIS DRINKING GAME EACH PERSON CHOOSES A NAME
FOR EXAMPLE, HORSESHIT, COWSHIT, ETC. THE NAME MUST
BE THAT OF AN ANIMAL FOLLOWED BY THE WORD SHIT.
THE GAME FOLLOWS THAT WHENEVER YOUR NAME IS CALLED
YOU MUST REPLY WITH "BULLSHIT"
THE OTHER PERSON THAN ASKS, "WHO SHIT?" AND THE PERSON IS EXPECTED
TO SAY ONE OF THE OTHER PERSONS' ANIMAL NAMES.
WHENEVER SOMEONE MAKES A MISTAKE THEY MUST CHUG THEIR BEER,
OR WHATEVER THEY ARE DRINKING AND THEN BEGIN THE
GAME AGAIN
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; DETROIT
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Special Object or Implement Food Drink -- Alcoholic beverage Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1975
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THE CANDY BAR SITUATION
Historical record from James Callow Folklore Archive.
ONE DAY MR. GOODBAR THOUGHT HE WOULD LIKE A BIT OF HONEY,
SO HE WENT DOWN TO FIFTH AVENUE AND PICKED UP MISS HERSHEY.
THEY WENT BEHIND THE POWERHOUSEE.
MR. GOODBAR SAID, "LET'S PRODUCE 3 MUSKETEERS".
MR. GOODBAR STARTED FEELING HER MOUNDS,
WHICH TO HIM WAS PURE ALMOND JOY.
HE SNICKERED UP HER MILKY WAY.
THEN SHE FELT HIS BUTTERNUTS AND CRIED, "OH HENRY, I AM
FOREVER YOURS".
THE RESULTS, BABY RUTH
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; HUNTINGTON WOODS
James Callow Keyword(s): EUPHEMISMS FOR BREASTS, VAGINA, AND GONADS ; PUNS ON NAMES OF CANDY BARS ; SEX
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Formula tale Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: CA00001977
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GOOD MORNING BY DONNA SMITH, AGE: 8
THE SUN WAS SHINING BRIGHTLY
AND I COULD HARDLY WAIT,
TO PONDER AT MY WINDOW
AND GAZE AT MY ESTATE.
THE BREEZE WAS BLOWING BRISKLY,
IT MADE THE FLOWERS SWAY,
THE GARDEN WAS ENCHANTING
ON THIS INSPIRING DAY.
MY EYES FELL ON A LITTLE BIRD
WITH A BEAUTIFUL YELLOW BILL.
I BECKONED HIM TO COME AND
LIGHT UPON MY WINDOW SILL.
I SMILED AT HIM CHEERFULLY
AND GAVE HIM A CRUST OF BREAD,
THEN I QUICKLY CLOSED THE WINDOW
AND SMASHED HIS FUCKING HEAD.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ROYAL OAK
James Callow Keyword(s): ANTICLIMAX ; CRUELTY TO ANIMALS ; FIRST-PERSON NARRATIVE ; SURPRISE ENDING
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Narrative Verse Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: CA00001977
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DO YOU KNOW A MAN IS MADE UP OF USELESS PARTS?
AN ADAM'S APPLE THAT IS NOT AN APPLE.
TWO CALVES THAT NEVER BECOME COWS.
TWENTY NAILS THAT WILL NOT HOLD BOARDS.
A CHEST THAT WILL NOT HOLD LINEN.
TWO TITS THAT WILL NOT GIVE MILK.
A BELLY BUTTON THAT WILL NOT BUTTON.
AN ASS THAT WILL NOT PULL A PLOW.
TWO BALLS THAT WILL NOT ROLL.
AN ORGAN THAT WILL NOT PLAY.
WHAT ARE YOU SMILING ABOUT?
YOU HAVE A PUSSY THAT WILL NOT CATCH MICE.
Submitter comment: THIS IS WRITTEN OUT ON PAPER AND GIVEN TO A GIRL BY ANOTHER GIRL.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; ROYAL OAK
James Callow Keyword(s): PARADOXES IN SLANG
| Subject headings: | SPEECH -- Formula Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: CA00001977
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VERSE
JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY,
THE WIND BLEW UP HER NIGHTY.
HER THING ALL BARE,
AND FULL OF HAIR.
JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY/
Submitter comment:
WHEN SOMEONE SAYS JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY IN OUR HOUSE,
MY FATHER USUALLY SAYS THIS VERSE.
Where learned: MICHIGAN ; HUNTINGTON WOODS
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Speech Speech Filter - Mature Content |
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VIRGINITY IS LIKE A BALLOON, ONE PRICK AND ITS GONE.
Where learned: RESTROOM WALL
James Callow Keyword(s): SLANG-PRICK FOR PENIS
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Art Craft Architecture Art, Craft, Architecture Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1978
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BAWDY BOOK TITLE
THE HOLE IN THE MATTRESS BY MR. COMPLETELY
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PUN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Explanation of a name Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1967
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BAWDY BOOK TITLE
THE PLASTIC BATHING SUIT BY SEYMOUR HARE.
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
James Callow Keyword(s): PUN
| Subject headings: | PROSE NARRATIVE -- Explanation of a name Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1961
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AUTOGRAPH BOOK RHYME
YOU MAY SIT ON MY LAP
BUT I PITY YOU IF YOU MARRY A JAP.
Submitter comment: FROM INFORMANT'S JUNIOR HIGH AUTOGRAPH BOOK 1929-1933
Where learned: PENNSYLVANIA ; GLENSHAW
Keyword(s): ADVICE ; ETHNIC SLUR ; MARRIAGE
| Subject headings: | Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Autograph Verse Cynical insight Ballad Song Dance Game Music Verse -- Proverb C880.400 Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 10-02-1971 ; 00001929-1933
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BAWDY BOOK TITLE
UNDER THE GRANDSTANDS
BY SEYMOUR BUTTS
Submitter comment: DID THESE AS A FRESHMAN AT THE UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
| Subject headings: | Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1961
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BAWDY BOOK TITLE
POUNDING IN THE DARK
BY IBEN JACKENOF
Submitter comment: DID THESE AS A FRESHMAN AT THE UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
Where learned: UNIVERSITY OF DETROIT
| Subject headings: | Filter - Mature Content |
Date learned: 00-00-1961